Module 11-1

Changes in thoughts, feelings and behaviors regarding standards of right and wrong Intrapersonal Interpersonal – regulates social interaction & arbitrates conflict

Yes, similar moral prescriptions are found in all major religions. Civilizations will not success where there are no laws against murder, theft, and lies and no regulation of sexual behavior.

Humanist Psychology says No - Hoffman (1970) Cautions against Love withdrawal (anxiety) Don’t like you; going to leave you Cautions against Power assertion (hostility) Spanking, threatening, removing privileges Makes parents appear to have poor self-control Recommends Induction Reasoning, consequences Works best with older children, middle SES

Some strategies work better- Thompson Warm-responsive parent-child relationships Secure attachment linked to conscience development Proactive strategies Conversational dialogue Other strategies – Be a good role model Foster an internal sense of morality Tell them about expected behaviors Use reason with punishment

Diana Baumrind Authoritative Authoritarian Indulgent (permissive-indulgent) Neglectful (permissive-neglectful)

Most successful Style Involves acceptance of and involvement with children, warm, attentive, sensitive reasonable control and insistence on mature behavior gradual granting of autonomy Results in cooperative children with self-control, high self-esteem, social & moral maturity, & good school performance

Low in acceptance/involvement, autonomy granting High in coercive control – degrade, yell, command, criticize, punish Children are anxious and unhappy. Boys become defiant. Girls become dependent. In adulthood don’t take initiative. Controlling strategies work for low-SES, African- American parents.

Warm and accepting Overindulging or inattentive Little control of the child’s behavior Children are impulsive, disobedient and rebellious, overly demanding and dependent on adults Tend to be non-achieving, especially boys

Low acceptance and involvement Little control General indifference Emotionally detached, depressed May become child neglect Disrupts attachment, cognition, and emotional and social skills

Spanking Considered necessary & desirable for centuries 70-90% of American parents have spanked their children Recent survey, 26% of parents of 3-4 year olds spank frequently 67% yell at their children frequently A number of countries have outlawed spanking

Out of control model for handling situations The “woodshed” was not out of control Punishment can instill fear, rage or avoidance This is temporary unless the parent-child relationship has other problems. Doe s the punishment fit the crime? Punishment tells children what not to do rather than what to do So? Tell them what to do along with the punishment.

Punishment can be abusive Abuse is abuse. It should not be disguised as punishment. Are we talking about spanking, or all punishment? Remember Hoffman? Are we thinking that children are “innately good?” Any evidence for this? Do parents believe that they have lost the right to discipline? What is the basis of that right?

Social Conventional Reasoning Social rules & conventions are arbitrary & created by people Moral Reasoning Moral rules are obligatory, widely-accepted, and somewhat impersonal Ethics exist apart from social convention

Turiel – 1978, year-old children conceptualize the social world in three separate domains Moral Social-conventional Psychological (personal) They realize that the rules for each of these have different levels of changeability.

Factors (Behaviorist view) Reinforcement & punishment Depends upon consistency & timing Models Depends upon characteristics such as warmth & attractiveness Situations Children behave inconsistently depending upon peer pressure, likelihood of being caught, personal characteristics Self-control Convinced by reasoning, punishment

Albert Bandura Moral competence – knowledge, capabilities, skills, awareness of rules Moral performance – motivation, rewards, incentives Self-regulation – avoiding self-condemnation and fostering self-satisfaction & self-worth

Sigmund Freud The desire to avoid feeling guilty is the foundation of moral behavior. Superego consists of: Ego ideal – rewards by conveying a sense of pride and personal value Conscience – punishes disapproved behaviors by making the child feel guilty & worthless

Responding to another’s feelings with a similar emotional response Examples of development of empathy Some infants show global empathy 1-2 years, may feel discomfort but cannot translate into action Early childhood – add perspective-taking may feel social or humanitarian empathy

Heinz dilemma – Wife near death One drug might save her Cost $200 to make; charged $2000 Heinz raised $1000, offered to pay later Druggist said no Heinz stole the drug

Level 1: Preconventional External rewards & punishments Level 2: Conventional Abide by internal standards of others (law or parents) Level 3: Postconventional Recognizes alternative codes, explores options, chooses one

Stage 1 – heteronomous Moral thinking is tied to punishment Stage 2 – individualism, instrumental purpose & exchange “live & let live” Equity of exchange: “I do you a favor; you do me one.”

Stage 3: Mutual interpersonal expectations, relationships & interpersonal conformity Value trust, caring & loyalty to others; children like “good girl; good boy” Stage 4: Social systems morality Understanding the social order, law, justice and duty

Stage 5: Social contract or utility and individual rights Values, rights & principles undergird the law; laws are evaluated by how well they protect human rights & values Stage 6: Universal ethical principles Moral standard based on universal human rights; will follow conscience rather than law

Cosmic perspective See one’s self as one with the universe Already a religious position - Hindu, New Age

Link between moral thought & moral behavior? Albert Bandura – people do not usually engage in harmful conduct until they have justified the morality of their actions to themselves Socially worthy cause God’s will

Religion provides the assumptions which underpin moral reasoning and decisions. Religion takes morality from individual to collective and universal. Religion provides the authority for moral prescriptions.

Rest – Assessment techniques What are the moral issues? Stages 5 & 6 do not stand up across cultures Example – Buddhist monks & emphasis on compassion India – social rules are inevitable

Haidt (2008) Traditionalist [collectivist] societies expect individuals to limit their desires and play their roles within the group “Western conservatives also seem to be morally challenged.” Conclusion: Kolhberg has an individualist, liberal, progress bias.

Carol Gilligan – gender bias Justice perspective – male norm that puts principles above people Care perspective – moral perspective that views people in terms of connectedness and emphasizes relationships & caring for others

70% of N.A. couples have children There is a pattern of delayed childbearing Fewer children (1.8 average in the U.S.) Parenthood is still regarded as one of life‘s most meaningful experiences.

Higher SES (Middle Class) parents: Develop children’s initiative and delay gratification Create home atmosphere in which children are more nearly equal participants Less likely to use physical punishment Less directive; more conversational with children Neighborhood variation affects child development Sociocultural Influences

Largest group is African-American young women (60% of births) Why? May have to do with black male unemployment Tap the extended family One-third marry later Still have problems of poverty, poor school achievement of children and antisocial behavior.

DINKs - double-income, no kids How many couples are voluntarily childless? 3-6% or 10-15% Often has to do with career commitment

Career Women (Hewlett, 2002) 33% were childless at age 40 42% who worked in corporations were childless 49% of (6-figure) ultra-achievers were childless 25% of high achievers age (&31% of ultra- achievers) would like to have a child No high achiever had a child after age 39 and no ultra- achiever after age 36

The birth of a child will save a failing marriage. The child will think, feel, behave as the parents did. Parents can expect the child to respect & obey them. The child is someone who will always love them. The child is a “second chance” to achieve. Parents can mold the child into what they want. Mothers are naturally better parents than fathers. Parenting is an instinct and requires no training.

Physical Abuse Sexual Abuse Neglect (physical, educational, emotional) Emotional/psychological Abuse

Most common offender is a young, poor, single mother who is overwhelmed and engages in neglect and psychological abuse Factors are social isolation, unrealistic expectations of the child, substance abuse, depression, poverty, sickly or difficult child, other life stresses

Physiological – stress hormones, abnormal brain wave patterns Emotional – rejection, anxiety, self-blame, psychological pain Social – discipline problems at school, poor peer relations Eventually serious learning and adjustment problems, depression, substance abuse, academic failure, delinquency

Research indicates that a trusting relationship with another person is the most important factor is preventing mothers with childhood histories of abuse from repeating the cycle. Parents Anonymous

Many people become grandparents in their 40s. They like being a valued elder, child indulger, having a form of immortality, and being able to transmit family history and values. Grandparents may offer childcare, and even greater support to a custodial parent of their grandchildren. Grandparents of the non-custodial parent often have to negotiate for visitation rights.

Surrogate parenting: grandparents take custody of their own grandchildren because the parent is not functioning due to such factors as drug abuse, mental illness, incarceration, adolescent pregnancy, divorce. Includes about 5.6 million children

Grandparents may be tired and emotionally drained, but joyful at being of help to the children. Children tend to fare better in school that those from single-parent or blended homes.