HPW 3C Unit 3 Socialization Lesson 12 – Child Behaviour Theorists, Discipline vs. Punishment

Child Behaviour Theorists By the end of this lesson, the student will demonstrate an understanding of various child behaviour theories. The student will evaluate techniques and child care practices promoted by experts in the field.

Barbara Coloroso Barbara Coloroso is an internationally recognized speaker in the areas of parenting, teaching, positive school climate and non-violent resolution. She is a world renowned author who has written a number of parenting books. Her most famous book is "Kids Are Worth It". She is highly sought as a keynote guest speaker and has spoken at hundreds of different workshops and conferences. When seeking real solutions to parenting dilemmas - always seek out the advice from Barbara Coloroso. Coloroso clip:

BARBARA COLOROSO SIX CRITICAL LIFE MESSAGES 1) I Believe in You 2) I Trust in You 3) I Know You Can Handle It 4) You Are Listened To 5) You Are Cared For 6) You Are Very Important to Me

THINK ABOUT IT: For each of the 6 Life Messages, explain by using 2 examples for each how each message contributes to the positive socialization of a child. I Believe in You I Trust in You Know You Can Handle It You Are Listened To You Are Cared For You Are Very Important to Me

Discipline That Works - The Difference Between Discipline And Punishment. Discipline and punishment are not the same. Discipline is about guiding children in ways that support their development of self-control. It is respectful, accepting and comforting. It enhances self-worth. Punishment is used to hurt. It focuses on the child rather than on the act or behaviour. Discipline is ongoing. It is the way you talk to your child, the way you treat your child, the way you live. It is how you help your children respond to the day-to-day events in their lives.

DISCIPLINE: WHAT IT IS AND WHAT IT IS NOT Punishment: adult oriented requires judgement impose power from without arouses anger and resentment invites more conflict

Discipline: shows children what they have done wrong gives them ownership of the problem gives them ways to solve the problems they have created leaves their dignity intact We are there to listen, support and offer options......we are not there to judge.

SECOND OPPORTUNITY 1. Give kids a responsibility 2. Give them a consequence that is logical, realistic and palatable to you. 3. When they blow it, give them the opportunity to do the first responsibility again AFTER they have experienced the consequences for blowing it the first time. SAY WHAT YOU MEAN..... MEAN WHAT YOU SAY..... DO WHAT YOU SAID YOU WOULD DO!

Effective Discipline Strategies 1. Set reasonable limits: These should be appropriate for the child's age. 2. Use consequences: These are important to teach a child responsibility and decision making. 3. Take corrective action as soon as possible: Correct the misbehaviour by carrying out logical consequences. 4. Stay calm: It helps the parent stay focused. 5. Timeouts: Provide the child with a 'short' time away from the inappropriate behaviour. Rule of thumb is 1 minute for each year of the child. 6. Set a good example: Discipline is best taught by example

Ineffective Discipline Strategies 1. Bribing: The child learns to expect to be rewarded for appropriate behaviour. 2. Making Children Promise to Behave: Children do not yet understand the concept of a promise. 3. Shouting or Yelling: This makes a child fear his parent. 4. Shaming or Belittling: Doing so can harm the child's self-confidence. 5. Threatening to withhold love: This creates the fear of being rejected or abandoned.

Key Question Read the following cases. In each, state whether the parent has used positive discipline. If so, state why. If not, correct with an appropriate method discipline and explain your reasoning. 1.Three year old Sasha frequently hits his 6 month sister. Each time Sasha's mom yelled at him and said "I will not love you anymore if you don't stop hitting your sister". 2.Five year old Linda usually watches DVD's from 6:30 - 7:30 p.m., and then gets ready for bed by 8:00 p.m. Lately, she has begun to dawdle and has not gotten to bed until 8:30 p.m. Her father has told her that if it takes so long to get ready, she will not be able to watch DVD's and will have to start getting ready for bed at 7:00 p.m. 3.Four year old Katie decided to throw a temper tantrum at the grocery store while she was shopping with mom. She wanted a specific type of cereal which mom would not buy. Mom said to Katie, "If you promise to stop screaming, I'll buy you a chocolate bar at the check out counter. 4.Five year old Logan recently talked back to her father because she did not like cleaning up after playing with her toys. Logan's dad gave her a 5 minute timeout. They talked about her behaviour afterwards.

Key Question Pretend you are a reporter covering the Barbara Colorosso Seminar that is being held in Toronto. Your report will be featured in the "Life Section" of the Toronto Star. Your assignment is to report on the "Effective Parenting Messages" Barbara Colorosso promotes with parents. Write a 3 paragraph article highlighting her significant messages and give your opinion of these messages to your readers.