Positive Parenting and Promoting Learning in the Home John Sharry

© John Sharry 2009 Parenting - An important note THERE IS NO ONE RIGHT WAY TO BRING UP CHILDREN What matters is finding a way that works for you, your children and your family BE CAREFUL ABOUT PARENTING EXPERTS Trust your own intuition and test ideas in your own experience

© John Sharry 2009 Parents Plus Programmes Video based parenting courses developed by the Parents Plus Charity in the Mater Hospital

Current Parents Plus Programmes Parents Plus Early Years Programme ( 1- 6 year olds) John Sharry, Grainne Hampson, Mary Fanning Parents Plus Childrens Programme (6-11 year olds) John Sharry, Carol Fitzpatrick Parents Plus Adolescents Programme (11 – 16 years olds) John Sharry, Carol Fitzpatrick

The importance of parents supportnng learning

The problem of learning in the home

Positive Parenting and Promoting Learning in the Home

© John Sharry 2009 POSITIVE DISCIPLINE Being firm, Able to set rules Teach child to behave POSITIVE PARENTING Being loving, Caring Encouraging Parenting – Getting the Balance Right

© John Sharry 2009 POSITIVE DISCIPLINE Homework routine/rules Consequences/ rewards POSITIVE PARENTING Fun learning Follow child’s lead and motivation Learning/ Homework – Getting the Balance Right

Principle ‘ Tuning into your Child’s Unique Motivations, Strengths and Talents’

Verbal Language Maths Logic Athletic, Physical Musical Rhythm Design/ Motor Experiential Natural A holistic view of Intelligence Reading Writing Social Interpersonal

Principle ‘ Supporing your child in their areas of weakness and demotivation’

REFLECTION Thinking of each of your children individually, What are their talent, motivations s and area of strength? What are their areas of weakness and demotivation? ?

Principle ‘ Establishing a Routine in the Home’

Principle ‘Encouraging your child in their homework

Principle ‘Encouraging your child in their homework – Three Steps ’ 1)Helping your child plan and get started 2)Being there to support and encourage 3)Reviewing how your child has got on

Further talks and information Positive Parenting Book – 8 Euro Parenting articles and features Parents Plus Programmes Q&A:

Principle ‘Switch from Criticism to Encouragement’

Criticism Cycle Parent notices what child is doing wrong Parent/ child Relationship can suffer Negative perception Child can feel defensive or undermined Parent in critical role Parent corrects or criticises

Positive Encouragment cycle Parent notices what child is doing right Parent/ child Relationship improves Positive perception Child enjoys praise Parent feels good Parent specifically praises

Five types of Encouragements 1)Acknowleging Feelings 2)Focusing on what is right, what is done well 3)Stating a positive goal or intention 4)Listening to your child’s positive intention 5)Expressing positive belief

Becoming an encouraging parent Critical Parent 1) Why are you so angry? Encouraging Parent I know you are upset at having to leave 3)That is the wrong place to put it 2) Why are you always late starting your homework? 4) Why are you so aggressive with your brother 5) Why didn’t you pick the blue block? Oh you got your books out, that is a start Put it here?/Let me show you I know you can get on with your brother Oh you picked the green block, you like green