Welcome to the Open Sky Webinar The webinar starts at 6pm, see you soon!

Mindful Parenting: Emotional Regulation & Boundary Holding Presented by: Norman Elizondo Family Wellness Counselor, Open Sky Wilderness Therapy

Boundaries 101: Successful Strategies for Setting, Keeping, and Following Through with Boundaries to Support Healthy Relationships Jonathan Mitchell, MA, LPC Clinical Therapist Open Sky Wilderness Therapy

Boundaries are Relational! (read: RISKY)

With Relationship, Boundaries Take on Higher Stakes…

If Boundaries Haven’t Worked Explore the polarity: Non-Relational Punishment --- Lenient Friendship

If Boundaries Haven’t Worked When I make a boundary from a place in which I am triggered (e.g., have taken what is happening personally), I become less effective. However, I can always use this experience as a way of strengthening a relationship by becoming transparent and disarmed, thereby increasing my chances of a boundary being met!

If Boundaries Haven’t Worked How do I “break” relationship when I am holding a boundary? What happens to me personally when I hold a boundary and it is broken? Through this investigation, I can both become more effective in holding them, and grow closer to my children.

What Can This Look Like? Most of the time, when we struggle holding boundaries (or boundaries struggle to be held) something from our own family of origin is getting in our way (i.e., breaks the relationship in that moment).

Awareness The state or ability to perceive, feel, or be conscious of events, objects or sensory patterns.

We can purposefully focus awareness AwarenessPhysicalMentalEmotionalSpiritual

Mindfulness “…non-elaborative, nonjudgmental, present- centered awareness in which each thought, feeling, or sensation that arises in the attentional field is acknowledged and accepted as it is.” (Bishop et al., 2004)

The Four- line Feelings Check Physical (body): internal & external physical sensations, sight, sound, smell and taste Mental (mind): thoughts & cognitions Emotional (heart): mood & specific emotions Spiritual (soul): sense of connectedness & integration

If Boundaries Haven’t Worked When I make a boundary from a place in which I am triggered (e.g., have taken what is happening personally), I become less effective. However, I can always use this experience as a way of strengthening a relationship by becoming transparent and disarmed, thereby increasing my chances of a boundary being met!

If Boundaries Haven’t Worked How do I “break” relationship when I am holding a boundary? What happens to me personally when I hold a boundary and it is broken? Through this investigation, I can both become more effective in holding them, and grow closer to my children.

Hold the line 1.Statement of Imminent Consequences. 2.Verbally, experientially enforcing the consequence.

If Boundaries Haven’t Worked Explore the polarity: Non-Relational Punishment --- Lenient Friendship

Boundaries are Relational!

The Four- line Feelings Check Physical (body): internal & external physical sensations, sight, sound, smell and taste Mental (mind): thoughts & cognitions Emotional (heart): mood & specific emotions Spiritual (soul): sense of connectedness & integration

Present moment awareness allows us to purposefully choose our action and our speech.

LET EVERY BOUNDARY BE FUELED BY THE STATEMENT, “I LOVE YOU!” AND “I AM IN CHARGE.”

Holding boundaries is tough, emotional work so in the moment: 1.Practice Mindfulness and become Aware 2.Emotionally Regulate by practicing Three-fold breathing and Interoception 3.Validate the other person 4.Make, verbalize and hold the boundary.

Alignment, Relaxation Resilience

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