Warm-Up In what ways do friends contribute to your life? List as many examples as you can!

Peer and Dating Relationships Lesson 30

Objectives Evaluate the positive and negative effects of peer relationships and friends on physical and emotional health Evaluate the dynamics of social groups Demonstrate refusal strategies and apply skills for making responsible decision under pressure Examine strategies for maintaining safe and healthy dating relationships Identify the characteristics of a healthy dating relationship

Friendship Significant relationship between two people Based upon caring, respect, trust and consideration People you share hobbies, interests and other friends with Platonic friendship: friendship with a member of the gender in which there is affection but the two people are not considered a couple

Types of Friendships Casual Close Relationship between peers who share something in common People with whom you share some interest but you do not necessarily form deep emotional bonds with Close Strong emotional ties Comfortable sharing thoughts, experiences and feelings Trust and support each other True friends have several common attributes: Similar values, interests, beliefs and attitudes Open and honest communication Sharing of joys, disappointments, dreams and concerns Mutual respect, caring and support Concern about each other’s safety and well-being

Cliques Small circle of friends usually with similar backgrounds of tastes, who exclude people viewed as outsiders Often share similar attitudes, wear the same clothing, meet regularly in an area identified as their “turf” and engage in other behaviors that identify them as a clique Can have both positive and negative influences on peers Positive: provide members with a sense of belonging, self confidence Negative: members discouraged from thinking for themselves, exclusion of other people, prejudices and stereotypes enforced Prejudice: making assumptions of judgments about an individual without really knowing him or her Stereotype: exaggerated and oversimplified belief about an entire group of people, such as an ethnic or religious group or a gender What are some common stereotypes? What prejudices do individuals face because of stereotypes. In your WU NB write about a time you felt like you were being stereotyped. Why do you think people were stereotyping you? How did it make you feel? How did you deal with it? After considering how you felt, think about if you have ever placed another person in a sterotype.

Building and Strengthening Friendships Be loyal Trust and depend on each other Speak respectfully of each other Encourage each other Be supportive Acknowledge each other’s accomplishments Help each other through difficult times Respect each other Common courtesy Avoid taking friends for granted Keep your promises

Peer Pressure The influence that people you age may have on you Positive or negative influences Positive: Encourage participation in healthful behaviors Discourage participation in risky behaviors Negative: Pressure others to take part in behaviors with negative consequences Harassment: persistently annoying others Engaging in behaviors against one’s values Manipulation: indirect, dishonest way to control or influence others

Resisting Negative Peer Pressure Avoid it if possible Develop friendships with people who share your values and interests Stay true to yourself Be assertive Stand up for your rights in a firm but positive way Use refusal skills Communication strategies that can help you say no when you are urged to take part in behaviors that are unsafe, unhealthy or that go against your values Step 1: State your position Just say no! Step 2: Suggest alternatives Suggest another activity in place of the one you do not want to partake in Step 3: Stand your ground Use strong body language Maintain eye contact Leave the situation

Passive and Aggressive Responses Passive: tendency to give up, give in or back down without standing up for one’s own rights and needs Passive teens may thing they are making friends by going along May cause others to view them as pushovers Aggressive: overly forceful, pushy, hostile or otherwise attacking in an approach Aggressive teens may react by yelling, shouting, shoving or insulting others Most people react to aggressive behavior by avoiding the individual Being ASSERTIVE, not passive or aggressive will serve as a useful skill throughout life, especially when resisting peer pressure Complete activity 12

Dating Don’t be pressured into dating, make sure it is your choice Group dates are a great option Dating allows teens to develop and practice social skills What to do on a date? Sports or athletic activities Promote health Allow dates to get to know each other better in a friendly, relaxed atmosphere Community activities Choose an event or activity that interests both of you Charitable activities Volunteering together can help build strong friendships A great option for group dates Brainstorm some local ideas where you could go on a date

Avoiding Risky Situations Avoid places where alcohol and drugs are present Alcohol and drugs impair judgment People under the influence are more likely to engage in risky behaviors Avoid being alone with a date at home or in an isolated place You may find it more difficult to maintain self-control when you are home alone or in an isolated place with a date

Relationships An ongoing relationship with just one person may help you develop skills and behaviors that will someday prepare you for the responsibility in marriage However, dating only one person during adolescent may limit your chances of socializing with others Teen years are a time to try different roles and relationships Don’t stay in a relationship just because it is comfortable Common dating problems include staying in a relationship because you don’t know how to leave it gracefully OR clinging to a person who wishes to end the relationship Honesty and open communication will help resolve difficulties

Setting Limits Curfew As you mature you’ll need to set your own limits May be set by a parent or guardian Set time that you must be home As you mature you’ll need to set your own limits Age, where you’ll go, what you’ll do Make your limits clear to avoid potentially risky situations Think about limits you have for yourself. Write them down. I have mentioned a few limits here, but there are many more you need to think about.

Read time health pg 324, find lyrics about relationships…how does this song portray a relationship? How do you think this effects society’s view about relationships? Think about the media in general…do you feel pressured to date or not to date because of the media? What kind of messages do tv shows, movies and songs send to teens about relationships? Extension: exploring issues pg 314…create a survey to find out what your classmates consider to be the most important values in a friendship. Is it different between boys and girls?