“But I’m Too HURT to FORGIVE” Final Week: “But I’m Too HURT to FORGIVE” Sermon Series… “Buts from the Pews” Confessions from Ordinary Christians

Joseph (See Book of Genesis) “Blended Family” Uncle Esau plotted to kill his father (Jacob) 10 Half-Brothers (Older) 1 Full-Brother (Younger) Three “Step-Moms” (Rachel is favored) Shown Favoritism (Coat of Many Colors) Shepherd (Ordinary Occupation) Gifted: Interpret Dreams Age 17: Sold into slavery by his brothers (Dad thought he was eaten by wild animal)

Joseph “Cliff Notes” Version Sold into slavery in Egypt Dad (Jacob) thinks Joseph is dead Became a servant at Potiphar’s Home Sent to Pharaoh’s jail Interprets dreams in jail Pharaoh calls Joseph to interpret his dream Pharaoh appoints Joseph Governor of Egypt Oversees the selling of grain to the people during the famine.. Joseph’s brothers are sent by dad to buy grain

Joseph “Cliff Notes” Continued… Joseph “messes” with his brothers Brothers return a second time for more grain (still not knowing Joseph is the Governor) Joseph takes them all into his home… He reveals himself to his brothers Joseph tells brothers to move their entire family (families) to Egypt Joseph and Dad (Jacob) reunited Family lives happily in the “Hollywood” of Egypt Jacob dies 17 years later…

Genesis 50:15-21 “When Joseph's brothers saw that their father was dead, they said, "What if Joseph holds a grudge against us and pays us back for all the wrongs we did to him?" So they sent word to Joseph, saying, "Your father left these instructions before he died: 'This is what you are to say to Joseph: I ask you to forgive your brothers the sins and the wrongs they committed in treating you so badly.' Now please forgive the sins of the servants of the God of your father." When their message came to him, Joseph wept.  His brothers then came and threw themselves down before him. "We are your slaves," they said. But Joseph said to them, "Don't be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don't be afraid. I will provide for you and your children." And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them.”

What Can We Learn from Joseph? Joseph lived-out Romans 12:21, “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” Forgiveness is not assumed! Joseph’s brothers weren’t certain of their forgiveness for 17 years! They hid fear in their hearts… Forgiveness can be granted with or without the offending party’s cooperation… Joseph chose to deal with his brothers kindly, out of love, supplying their needs…

“It’s Not Possible!” Agree or Disagree?: “I can forgive, but I cannot forget.” “I cannot forgive ________ completely.” “Three strikes and you’re out.”

Forgiveness the World’s Way Alienation Revenge Pain Anger Isolation Depression Indifference Insincerity Grudges Sarcasm Remembering what has been forgiven…

Forgiveness: God’s Way Hebrews 8:12, “For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more." Isaiah 43:25, “I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.” 2 Corinthians 5:17, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” Ephesians 1:7, “In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace” Colossians 2:13-14, “When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your sinful nature, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, having canceled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross. Colossians 3:13, “Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

The Most Important Part… Genesis 50:20-21, “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don't be afraid. I will provide for you and your children." And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them.”

Warning Mark 11:25, “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins." Matthew 6:14, “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.” Matthew 5:22-24, “But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, 'Raca,' [EMPTY HEAD-Insult] is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, 'You fool!' will be in danger of the fire of hell. "Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.

How Many Times? Matthew 18:21-22 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?"  Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” Forgiveness does not equate to Stupidity… Trust takes many years to re-build…

“A Parable Moment” by Jesus Matthew 18:23-35 Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents [A Lot of $$$] was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. "The servant fell on his knees before him. 'Be patient with me,' he begged, 'and I will pay back everything.' The servant's master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. "But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii [7200]. He grabbed him and began to choke him. 'Pay back what you owe me!' he demanded. "His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, 'Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.' "But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt.

“A Parable Moment” by Jesus Matthew 18:23-35 When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened. "Then the master called the servant in. 'You wicked servant,' he said, 'I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?' In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. "This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart."

But I’m too Hurt to Forgive! “Forgiveness is ME giving up the right to hurt you for hurting ME.” -Unknown “There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness.” -Josh Billings “To be wronged is nothing unless you continue to remember it.” –Confucious “Forgotten is forgiveness.” –Unknown “Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.” –Paul Boese “One forgives to the degree that one loves.” -Unknown

My Favorite Quote and My Business Card “Forgiveness is not an emotion, it is a decision.” –R. Worley My Business Card

Remove the Band-Aid! Put the Band-Aid on the pointer finger of your dominant hand… Forgive Much and Love Much- Like Joseph! Godly Solutions: Take Time to Heal Don’t Withhold Forgiveness Rehab with Jesus Forgive and Release Receive Christ’s Grace Choose Reconciliation Point all people to Jesus Wound Healer Pain Manager Fall Preventor