Parents & College Admission: Resources to Help ASCA Annual Conference June 26, 2011 Bob Bardwell Amy Thompson

Types of Parents Helicopter parents who hover around their children and offer too much help; Rolls-Royce parents who demand the absolute best for their children; Subway parents who lurk underground “and surface at the most awkward times, asking the most peculiar questions Junker parents who let personal dramas subsume their child’s college quest. Hybrid parents begin the process one way, evolve into another type by the end.

Ways to help parents through this process This is the student’s journey and all about “fit” Provide information for the common jargon If you have a good student and money is tight, there are options. Informational nights, teach the parents how to communicate with colleges Get high school alumni involved with the informational nights Help parents understand FERPA release Provide a parent page and newsletters Our goal is to focus on channeling the parents’ energy to empower the student and support this process.

Letting Go or Holding On  What do parents expect from us as counselors?  What demographic components of our institutions influence these expectations?  What information/familiarity do we need to have regarding post high school options for our students? (professional organizations, counselor college tours, training, etc.)

Letting Go or Holding On (continued)  Important counselor knowledge to assist parents – school counselor developmental curriculum, courses, extra-curricular activities, community service, volunteer, summer options, work, GAP year, student counselor meetings, parent informational programs, parent conferences  Develop a strong sense of dialog/communication with parents - positive rapport, well informed, knowledgeable, honest, confident  GOAL in Parent-Counselor relationship is to create a partnership where the parent is an ASSISTANT in the process.  Parents as assistants– How much? How often? In what areas?

How to keep the focus on Counseling (or at least try to....) with challenging parents  With all that we have our daily schedules, how do we carve time to be present for kids and parents?  What are some strategies for making our guidance and counseling offices welcoming and safe spaces for counseling conversations? What are ways to reinforce the “counseling NOT placement” message. Mission Statement - reinforces values ( we are a counseling office NOT a placement office) Physical Space - make resources readily accessible, transparent Weekly & Yearly Schedule – demonstrate opportunities of access Web Presence - go to where the students and parents are getting their information

Mission Statement The mission of Thomas Jefferson High School's Department of Student Services (DSS) is to provide students with a safe, optimum environment in which to grow and realize their potential in the academic and personal/social areas of their lives. The holistic education of each young person is the foundation of our approach for and with students. All individual conferences, group meetings, school-wide programs, and the other services we provide encompass this mission. From the beginning of freshman year to graduation day, the Student Services Department continuously works with students and their parents/guardians to design an academic plan that advances personal goals and satisfies the rigorous graduation requirements for a ‘TJ Diploma’. During the academic year, the Student Services Department offers a variety of programs on subjects ranging from ethics and leadership to the college application and transition process. Through newsletters, guidebooks and other publications, the DSS keeps the TJ community informed of student- related issues, resources and important calendar dates. Taken from TJ website, June 2011

The Biggest Parental Concern: Money!  What is our role?  Do you complete the process for them?  What is the community expectation/need?  Are there other resources available?  How do we discuss affordability with families?  What about scholarships?

Resources to help parents discuss financing a college education (continued)  Counseling strategies  Listen  Provide support and encouragement  Connect families with college financial aid administrators  Depending upon community expectation  Refer to financial planners or FAFSA preparers

Resources to help parents discuss financing a college education  Programs  Speakers  Books  Web-based Resources  Free stuff  Federal Government  State Agencies  Non-profit organizations  Private companies

Communication is Key!  When parents feel informed and included, most tend to trust you and the process. Facebook and/or School-Based Website Twitter EduBlogs Blasts Newsletters and other mailings Parent Programs

Contact information  Bob Bardwell Monson High School, MA  Amy Thompson York Community High School, IL