Pathfinder Communications Rules Created by James J. Messina, Ph.D.

Pathfinder P Principles A Activating T Tracking H Hugging F Formulating I Intervening N Negotiating D Discussing E Establishing R Releasing

Pathfinder P A T H Hugging F I Intervening N D Discussing E R

Communications Rules 1. Focus on feelings and not content 2. Dont parallel listen 3. Dont jump to assumptions about how children feel or what they mean 4. Dont compete with children for who knows more 5. Listen effectively to children

Communications Rules 6. Respond with understanding to children 7. Use "I statements" instead of "you statements" 8. Clarify what children are saying 9. Dont belittle or make fun of children 10. Dont put your words into children's mouths

Communications Rules 11. Make time to have discussions with children 12. Maintain your sense of humor 13. Describe behaviors not children 14. Stay focused on the "here and now" 15. Control your temper

Communications Rules 16. Use "open ended questions" 17. Dont use "door closers" 18. Be rational in discussions 19. Dont make comparisons to others with children 20. Help children recognize when actions are inconsistent with words