Chapter 15 Divorce

Chapter Outline Ways of Measuring Divorce Prevalence Macro Factors Contributing to Divorce Micro Factors Contributing to Divorce Gender Differences in Filing for Divorce Consequences for Spouses Who Remain Unhappily Married

Chapter Outline Consequences for Spouses Who Divorce Effects of Divorce on Children Conditions of a “Successful” Divorce Alternatives to Divorce Divorce Prevention

True or False? The divorce rate has continued to increase so that by 2006, 6 in 10 new marriages were predicted to end in divorce

Answer: False Current estimates suggest that about 40% of those who married in the past couple of decades will divorce (Hawkins et al., 2002). Goodwin (2003) noted that 20% of first marriages will end in divorce within five years, 33% within 10 years, and 43% within fifteen years of marriage.

True or False? After 15 years of marriage, about 43% of couples will have divorced.

Answer: True After 15 years of marriage, about 43% of couples will have divorced.

True or False? Spouses in loveless, conflicted, unhappy marriages are less healthy/happy than those who divorced/left these type relationships.

Answer: True Spouses in loveless, conflicted, unhappy marriages are less healthy/happy than those who divorced/left these type relationships.

True or False? Whether a spouse initiates the divorce (the “dumper”) or reacts to a spouse who does (the “dumpee”) makes no difference in terms of adjustment to the divorce.

Answer: False Sakraida (2005) interviewed women who both initiated and were the recipient of a terminated relationship and found that the person being dropped (the “dumpee”) was more vulnerable to depression and ruminated more about the divorce.

Divorce The legal ending of a valid marriage contract. Crude divorce rate –How many divorces have occurred for every 1,000 people in the population. Refined divorce rate –The number of divorces and annulments in a given year divided by the number of married women in the population times 1,000.

Divorce: Macro Factors Increased Economic Independence of Women –Finding gainful employment outside the home made it possible for the wife to afford to leave her husband if she wanted to. Changing Family Functions and Structure –Many of the protective, religious, educational, and recreational functions of the family have largely been taken over by outside agencies.

Divorce: Macro Factors Liberalized Divorce Laws –All states now recognize some form of no- fault divorce. Fewer Moral and Religious Sanctions –Increasingly, marriage is viewed in secular rather than religious terms. –Hence, divorce has become more acceptable.

Divorce: Macro Factors Starter Marriages –Suggests something temporary, like a starter house from which the owners will eventually move. More Divorce Models –The less deviant the person perceives divorce, the greater the probability the person will divorce if that person’s own marriage becomes strained.

Divorce: Macro Factors Mobility and Anonymity –Divorce thrives when pro-marriage social expectations are not operative. Individualistic Cultural Goal of Happiness –Unlike familistic values in Asian cultures, individualistic values in American culture emphasize the goal of personal happiness in marriage.

Question Which of the following is not a macro factor of divorce? A.value changes B.liberalized divorce laws C.women's economic independence D.individualistic attitudes

Answer: A Value changes are not a macro factor of divorce.

Divorce: Micro Factors Loss of Love –Couples who no longer viewed themselves as being in love are much more likely to divorce. Negative Behavior –When a spouse’s negative behavior continues to the point of creating more costs than rewards, either partner may begin to seek a more reinforcing situation.

Divorce: Micro Factors Lack of Conflict Resolution Skills –Without skills to resolve conflict, partners drift into patterns of communication that escalate conflict. Value Changes –Because people change throughout their lives, the person that one selects at one point in life may not be the same partner one would select at another.

Divorce: Micro Factors Satiation –Refers to the state in which a stimulus loses its value with repeated exposure. Extramarital Relationship –Extramarital involvements sometimes hurry a decaying marriage toward divorce.

Divorce: Micro Factors Perception That Being Divorced Is Better Than Being Married –2/3 of applications for divorce are filed by women. –This based on the fact that they achieve greater power over their own life, money, and greater control over their children.

Micro Factors Contributing to Divorce American couples are socialized to marry for love and to stay married as long as love is alive. When love dies, spouses are vulnerable to divorce. Pg. 429

Question What is a micro factor of divorce? A.value changes B.social pressures C.religious beliefs D.economic institutions

Answer: A Value changes are a micro factor of divorce.

Question When the novelty of marriage wears off, couples usually experience: A.satiation B.infidelity C.increased happiness. D.boredom

Answer: A When the novelty of marriage wears off, couples usually experience satiation.

Divorce: Top 20 Factors 1. Courtship of less than two years 2. Having little in common 3. Marrying in teens 4. Differences in race, education, age, religion, social class, values 5. Not being religiously devout

Divorce: Top 20 Factors 6. A cohabitation history 7. Previous marriage 8. No children 9. Limited education 10. Urban residence

Divorce: Top 20 Factors 11. Infidelity 12. Divorced parents 13. Poor communication skills 14. Unemployment of husband 15. Employment of wife

Divorce: Top 20 Factors 16. Depression, alcoholism, or physical illness of spouse or child, as well as imprisonment 17. Having seriously ill child 18. Low self-esteem of spouses 19. Race 20. Retirement

Filing For Divorce: Gender Differences Women are more likely to seek a divorce. Feeling a sense of renewed “self identity” was the top reward women reported on the other side of the divorce. Men are less likely to seek a divorce since they view the cost as separation from their children.

Consequences For Spouses Who Remain Unhappily Married Hawkins and Booth (2005) analyzed longitudinal data of spouses in unhappy marriages over a 12-year period. They found that those who stayed unhappily married had lower life satisfaction, self-esteem, and overall health compared to those who divorced whether or not they remarried. They suggest there is no evidence that spouses in unhappy marriages are better off in any aspect of overall well-being than those who divorce.

Consequences for Spouses Who Divorce Fathers’ Separation from Children –Most divorced fathers believe the courts have little interest in protecting their relationship with their children. Shared Parenting Dysfunction –The set of behaviors on the part of each parent that are counterproductive to the child’s well-being.

Consequences for Spouses Who Divorce Parental Alienation Syndrome –A disturbance in which children are obsessively preoccupied with deprecation and/or criticism of a parent, denigration that is unjustified and/or exaggerated.

Minimizing Negative Effects of Divorce on Children 1. Healthy parental psychological functioning. 2. A cooperative relationship between the parents. 3. Parents’ attention to the children and allowing them to grieve. 4. Encouragement to see noncustodial parent. 5. Attention from the noncustodial parent.

Telling Children About Divorce Telling the children together gives children confirmation that both parents want this to happen and “neither parent is the bad parent.” Pg. 442

Question The deliberate, systematic attempt to eliminate the psychological connection of the other parent in a child's life is called A.maternal gate keeping B.paternal alienation syndrome C.maternal alienation syndrome D.parental alienation syndrome

Answer: D The deliberate, systematic attempt to eliminate the psychological connection of the other parent in a child's life is called parental alienation syndrome.

Your Opinion? To what degree do you believe the government should be involved in mandating divorce mediation?

Conditions of a “Successful” Divorce 1. Mediate rather than litigate the divorce. 2. Coparent with your ex-spouse. 3. Take some responsibility for the divorce. 4. Learn from the divorce. 5. Create positive thoughts. 6. Avoid alcohol and other drugs.

Conditions of a “Successful” Divorce 7. Relax without drugs. 8. Engage in aerobic exercise. 9. Engage in fun activities. 10. Continue interpersonal connections. 11. Let go of your anger for the ex-partner. 12. Allow time to heal.

Question Compared with litigation, what is the key feature of divorce mediation? A.There is lots of public exposure B.It is more expensive C.It fosters a better relationship between spouses D.It is more time consuming

Answer: C Compared with litigation, a key feature of divorce mediation is that it fosters a better relationship between spouses.

Question What is a condition for a successful divorce? A.co-parenting the children B.getting everything you want so you won't harbor needless resentment C.realize what's best for the couple is ultimately what's best for the children D.good litigation

Answer: A Co-parenting the children is a condition for a successful divorce.

Alternatives to Divorce An annulment returns the spouses to their premarital status. There are two types of separation—formal and informal. Desertion differs from informal separation in that the deserter walks out and breaks off all contact.

Question The action returning a couple to their premarital status is referred to as A.separation B.cohabitation C.divorce D.annulment

Answer: D The action returning a couple to their premarital status is referred to as annulment.

Requirements of Covenant Marriage Full disclosure of information that could affect the partner’s decision to marry. Oath that the marriage is a lifelong commitment. Agreement to consider divorce only for reasons such as abuse, adultery, and imprisonment on a felony or separation of more than two years. Agreement to see a marriage counselor if problems threaten the marriage.