Parenting Styles, Child Abuse, and Social Development

Parenting Styles If I had my child to raise all over again, I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later. I'd finger-paint more, and point the finger less. I would do less correcting and more connecting. I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes. I'd take more hikes and fly more kites. I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play. I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars. I'd do more hugging and less tugging. ~Diane Loomans, from "If I Had My Child To Raise Over Again"

Authoritarian Parents are the “bosses Parents are the “bosses May believe the child has no right to question their decisions. May believe the child has no right to question their decisions.

Democratic or Authoritative Children participate in decisions affecting their lives. Children participate in decisions affecting their lives. Are more confident of own values and goals. Are more confident of own values and goals. Establishment of limits Establishment of limits Responding to the child with warmth and support. Responding to the child with warmth and support.

Democratic or Authoritative Are more likely to make own decisions with or without advice. Are more likely to make own decisions with or without advice. Why? Why? Assume responsibility gradually. Assume responsibility gradually. Identify with parents who love Identify with parents who love and respect them. Parents present a model of responsible, cooperative independence. Parents present a model of responsible, cooperative independence.

Permissive or Laissez-Faire Children have the final say. Children have the final say. Parents may try to guide, but give in when the children insist on having their own way. Parents may try to guide, but give in when the children insist on having their own way.

Uninvolved Egocentric Egocentric Uncommitted to their roles Uncommitted to their roles Distant Distant

Effects of Parenting Styles Democratic: are more confident of their own values and goals. Democratic: are more confident of their own values and goals. More likely to make their own decisions with or without advice. More likely to make their own decisions with or without advice. Has assumed responsibility gradually. Has assumed responsibility gradually. More likely to identify with parents who love and respect them. More likely to identify with parents who love and respect them. Parents present a model of responsible, cooperative independence for them to imitate. Parents present a model of responsible, cooperative independence for them to imitate.

Child Abuse Physical or mental Physical or mental Sexual abuse Sexual abuse Negligence/mistreatment Negligence/mistreatment 3 million reports every year. 3 million reports every year.

Causes of Child Abuse Many abusive parents were themselves abused. [1/3 according to childhelp.org] Many abusive parents were themselves abused. [1/3 according to childhelp.org] Many abusive parents have little patience Many abusive parents have little patience Unrealistic expectations. Unrealistic expectations. Overburdened, stressed out Overburdened, stressed out Unemployment Unemployment Lack of contact with family, friends, or social groups. Lack of contact with family, friends, or social groups.

How to reduce child abuse? Parent education. Parent education. Learn new ways of dealing with their children. Learn new ways of dealing with their children. Resources and support Resources and support