EAP9:Argumentative Essays Where did it all go wrong? How can we make it right?

ORGANISATION AND PLANNING Lack of planning Poor introductions and conclusions Lack of argumentation Lack of proof-reading Reference to research and data that you appear to have invented LANGUAGE ISSUES Confusing use of articles and problems of singular or plural nouns Chinglish vocabulary Non-academic language Referents The same mistakes I’ve seen and corrected many times before Poor use of linkers

LACK OF PLANNING Write a plan and check that it answers the question before you start writing. Don’t include points that are irrelevant to your argument.

POOR INTRODUCTIONS AND CONCLUSIONS The introduction should include some relevant background information to introduce the topic, and it should give your reader an idea of the structure of your whole argument. Your conclusion should be like a reply to your introduction. It should summarise your argument in a new way, and then possibly include your opinion or a reference to the future. Mark will now give you some introductions to look at to exemplify the problems you had.

LACK OF CLEAR ARGUMENTATION Look at the notes I made on a randomly selected paragraph and tell me if you can see a clear line of argument...

ORGANISATION AND PLANNING Lack of proof-reading: count the number of subject-verb agreement mistakes you make. You know how to fix these! Reference to research and data that you appear to have invented: - According to the data from the Chinese government. Every year only about 30 percent of overseas student who graduate from University come back to china. - From some recent researches, there is a trend that many teenage boys and teenage girls have early sexual experiences and some of the young girls become unwanted pregnancies. In an advanced investigation, these adolescents are more exposed to alcohol and drug abuse and perform less well in school than their inexperienced peers. Almost all parents think it would be a horrible thing if it happens on their own children, so they always command their children to come back home early - Nowadays teenager is a large group in the world.

LANGUAGE ISSUES Confusing use of articles and problems of singular or plural nouns Chinglish vocabulary Non-academic language Referents Poor use of linkers a)The speed of the idea of multi-culture spreaded b)It is so cool. c)Comparing their homeland to the develop countries, the latter one is much more beautiful, charming and attractive. d)Using IT, THIS, THOSE, THESE etc when it is not clear what these words refer to. e)Fighting for China f)Advance the culture transmission / culture communication

Culture communication have also played a significant role in international business. Thus, this gives opportunities for a country which has more students going overseas. Because they know how to coorperate with people in different culture, avoide conflicts and make large profit. Moreover, it is also important for their country to introduct their own culture and receive the others’. For those who do not come back, they also can do something for their nation. A good respectation of their country can be built by their own success

EFFECTIVE PLANNING

“It is better for children to be educated in single-sex classes.” Student A: Think of an argument against this point of view. Student B : Think of an argument to support this point of view. As diplomatically as you can, present your arguments to each other. Defend your own position and provide rebuttals for your partner’s points.

What is the main point being made in this introduction? Where can you find it? What do you expect to find in the rest of the essay? What background information is given as a starting point for the discussion:

Should the USA send a manned mission to Mars? Group A: Read the essay on page 151 of Oshima & Hogue. Group B: Read the essay on page 154 of Oshima & Hogue Prepare to give a presentation on the content of your essay. To help you, make simple notes on separate pieces of paper divided into BACKGROUND INFORMATION, MAIN POINTS, and CONCLUSION. For every MAIN POINT, make notes in your own words on the support provided by the writer.