+ Dealing with Our Fears! ماوراء الخوف والقلق؟ St. George & St. Joseph Coptic Orthodox Church, Montreal, QC Family Meeting – September 23, 2015 Yousry Armanios, M.D.

اقول لكم يا احباءي: لا تخافوا من الذين يقتلون الجسد وبعد ذلك... (لوقا 12:4)

Worries & Fears! “Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, … Are you not of more value than they? Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?” (Matthew 6:25-27)

Faith vs. Worrying! “Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” (Matthew 6:34)

What Can Worrying Do to Us? Sleep Irregularities - Nightmares Physical Suffering: Cardiovascular, GIT … General Anxiety Panic Attacks Impact on School, Job, Family Life … etc. Making Wrong Decisions Depression

On Top! على القمة ! جلست على قمة العالم عندما صرت: “I have sat on top of the world when I desired nothing and feared nothing!” (Saint Augustine)

أمراض القلق (امثلة) Expressing Our Worries! + مرض القلق + مرض الفزع + مرض الكمالية + مرض الوسواس + When worrying becomes a disorder! Anxiety Disorders: Anxiety; Panic Attacks; Obsessive Compulsive Disorder; Perfectionism; PTSD … etc

Our Fears & Worries: How We Develop the “W-word”! Our Early Childhood Years

Our Fears & Worries: How We Develop the “W-word”! + Anyone in Your Family was a Worrier? + Were You the Caring Family Member? + Worried about Things in Your Life Today: 1.Health (Life in General)? 2.Your Significant Others? 3.Finances – Job – Career … 4.Role of the Media!

The Stereotype: “I am so Scared”! Adolescents & Teenagers Young Adults Getting Married After Marriage Parents Empty Nests Seniors

Are These Real Issues? 1. Role of Magnifying vs. Minimizing 2. Role of Reality! 3. Role of Guilt & God’s Punishment! 4. Forgiveness!

Dealing with Fears & Worries Faith & Spirituality Support Assurance: “Do Not Worry!” (360+ times) “Systematic Desensitization” “Reconditioning” Repentance & Communion! Fearing God?!

No Fear in Love! “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.” (1John 4:18)

Worried about Your Own Salvation? Are You?!

Finally: “Do Not Be Afraid,” 366 Times “Do not fear, for those who are with us are more than those who are with them.” (2 Kings 6:16)

And, Never Be Afraid! “Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom.” (Luke 12:32)

Depression The Other “Twin”!

Sorrow & Depression What is the Difference Between Depression and Sadness or Sorrow?

What is Depression? Profound or Deep Sadness Plus Loss of Interest or Motivation

How Does Depression Hurt? "I feel sad all the time" "I just don’t like myself" "I don't enjoy being with friends or others” “I no more love the things I used to enjoy" "I've had a lot of trouble sleeping" "I’m having aches, and I don't know why." "I feel like my life is not worth of anything"

Depression Occurs Because of: Things Inside Us ( In trinsic – Genetic Factor) Primary Depression: Serious and needs Medical Attention for Life! Things Outside Us ( Ex trinsic – Acquired) Secondary Depressions: Sometimes Very Serious and Counseling (and sometimes Medical Attention) till Complete Recovery!

Body Language

Secondary Depression: How Does It Start? Childhood: 1.Child Abuse & Bullying (Low Self-worth) 2.Exposure to Child Neglect (Insecurity) 3.Miscommunication & Lack of Validation 4.Build-up of Guilt & Anger 5.Exposure to Family Disruptions (Fear) 6.Exposure to “Depression-at-Home” 7.“My Child is Like an Angel”!

Later in Life Loneliness Introversion & Withdrawal Anger, Resentment & Depression Addiction & Depression (Emotional Pain) Dysfunctional Life Aspects

Dopamine, Serotonin (Endorphins) How Do They Work?

Acting Out Depression & Anxiety 1. Hyperactivity & Restlessness (Children) 2. Indulgence in Pleasurable Activities: Drugs; Alcohol; Sex; the Internet; Eating; Shopping; Gambling … etc. 3. Engagement in Negative Relationships 4. Withdrawal from Social Interactions

The Outcome Avoiding negative feelings doesn’t work Suffering more emotional pain More loneliness, anger and self-pitying Believing that “No one understands!” Blaming self or others for all problems Losing Interest in Life gradually May think that death solves problems

The Solution! Hope & Support Faith in a Better Future, in Christ Forgiveness: Confession & Communion Healthy Spirituality & Spiritual Attitudes Non-Judgmental Social Approaches Appropriate Intervention: Counseling Medical Treatment (whenever needed)

Finally: “ Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!” (Philippians 4:4)

Thank You Questions & Answers Dr. Yousry Armanios