To answer this question, you need to explain what has caused Antonio to mature and the effect of that experience (how you can tell that Antonio has matured).

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Presentation transcript:

To answer this question, you need to explain what has caused Antonio to mature and the effect of that experience (how you can tell that Antonio has matured). This is a cause and effect paragraph. Since Tony is still only six years old, how is “the time of youth” fleeing?

* Cause: two specific reasons w/ textual evidence as proof * Effect: two specific effects w/ textual evidence as proof * You must have a clear topic sentence. * Statement / Point--clear statements (your ideas) * Proof /Evidence—Give relevant proof (quotes, examples) for each statement * Analysis—Don’t just repeat what you’ve already said. Make a connection to the topic, to the point you’re trying to make, to a deeper point. Conclude the paragraph with a sentence that wraps up without repetition.

You must have a clear topic sentence. * summarizes the main idea captures the intent of the entire paragraph. Must be general enough to express the paragraph’s overall subject, but should be specific enough that the reader can understand the paragraph’s main subject and point.

Topic sentence: student samples:  Although the protagonist, Antonio Marez, of Bless Me, Ultima is only six, he is mature well beyond his years.  In “Bless Me, Ultima”; Antonio Marez is beginning to discover his maturity.  Antonio is a seven year old boy, who is experiencing things, a normal seven year old would not.

Topic sentence: student samples:  Antonio Marez, the boy who discovers himself and his family’s wishes at the age of six.  Throughout the first three chapters of Bless Me, Ultima there is a slight change in Tony.  In “Bless Me Ultima” our main character Antonio has been effected by certain events that have prematurely entrenched him in the adult world.

Topic sentence: students samples  Throughout the novel “Bless Me, Ultima” the main character, Antonio, slowly loses his youth because of two specific events that happen in his life.  “The day dawned, and already the time of youth was fleeing the house…” Tony says this in the book Bless Me, Ultima

Statement, Proof, Analysis, Transitions:  Statement / Point: make a clear statement (your idea, your reason, your words)  Proof / Evidence: provide proof with a relevant example or quote. It is relevant if it supports your topic sentence. Use transition, “For example,” “For instance,” etc.  Analysis : Explain the significance of the example; make a connection to the topic; develop the topic; be persuasive—stay on topic and don’t waste words.

My Example: (statement) One event that causes Tony to mature is his encounter with Lupito on the night of Lupito’s death. (proof) For example, Tony is on the river bank, close enough to see that Lupito is not aiming his gun at the men on the bridge. Tony shouts “No, no” but he says, “it was too late for anything. The frightened men responded by aiming their guns over the side of the bridge” and shooting (22). (analysis) The incident is traumatic for Tony because he realizes that Lupito is not a danger to the men on the bridge when they all fire at Lupito. Thus he witnesses men whom he knows and respects, including his father, killing another human being without just cause.

Student Samples: This is a bizarre trait for any child, let alone a six year old, but Antonio has undergone this change due to the fact that his innocence was snatched away from him at such a young age. There are not many events or things that can take a child’s innocence, but Antonio has had to experience plenty of them, such as, watching the murder of a man which is shown in the quotes “I saw Lupito lifted off his feet and hurled backwards by bullets” (22) and “He looked up at me and is face was bathed in water and flowing, hot blood” (22).

Student Sample: The first time I saw a change of maturity in Tony was when he was standing under the bridge, watching the scene with Lupito. Tony is already quite mature for his age, but I believe that Tony has matured greatly from this incident. Antonio says “ A priest could have saved Lupito. Oh why did my mother dream for me to be a priest?” (23). This quote is a perfect example of what causes Antonio to mature. To rewind a bit, Lupito is the man who kills Chavez’ brother. The death of Lupito is witnessed by Antonio.

Student Sample: Moreover, when Antonio talks of his mother he always describes how she expects him to be a Priest. Furthermore he was brought up to be very responsible so that he is respected enough to be a priest. Plus I believe this responsibility also shapes him to be more mature than other kids his age.

Student Sample: Antonio sees Lipido get killed by men he knows, which cause him to mature. Antonio has followed his father to the bridge where Lupido is hiding. He is on the bank when he sees Lupido coming towards him. After he arrives he is “lifted off his feet and hurled backward by the bullets” (22). Antonio is very close to Lupido when his is happening. This is traumatic for anyone, but for a boy, who is seven, this is mind-shattering. Anthony could not be blamed, if he is scarred for the rest of his life because of this event. Because of this event, Antonio is forced to mature, so he understands why his father, and his friends did this. In order to understand, Antonio goes to Ultima for advice. Ultima explains to Antonio that what he witnessed is “the ways of men” (25. :

Student Samples: Some ways that describe how time was fleeing, was Tony had become wiser and more mature. An example of Tony gaining wisdom comes from the passage, “The war had taken my brothers away and so the school would take me away. (32). Tony wishes he could stay near his mom forever, but understands that cannot happen. He understand that he must go to school and learn. Just like he must leave to go to school, his brothers have left to go fight the war.

USE TRANSITIONS SO THE READER CAN FOLLOW YOUR IDEAS NEW IDEA: ALSOFURTHERMORE MOREOVER ANOTHER REASON IS QUOTE:FOR EXAMPLE FOR INSTANCE AN EXAMPLE IS

DO NOT WRITE YOUR ESSAY LAST MINUTE! YOU SHOULD RUN YOUR GRAMMAR /SPELL CHECK BUT BE AWARE THAT THE COMPUTER MAKES MISTAKES READ ESSAY ALOUD AND LISTEN FOR AWKWARD PHRASING HAVE SOMEONE ELSE READ YOUR ESSAY. REVISE EACH SET OF STATEMENT-PROOF-ANALYSIS SO THAT IT IS CLEAR MAKE SURE YOUR QUOTE IS RELEVANT & SUPPORTS THE POINT YOU’RE MAKING, NOT SOME INCIDENTAL IDEA MAKE SURE YOUR IDEAS ARE EXPRESSED IN DIRECT, CLEAR AND FORMAL LANGUAGE Avoid using flowery language or big words that obscure the meaning—eschew obfuscation! Take time to write well so you can be proud of your work.

DUE DATE FOR FINAL “YOUTH IS FLEEING” PARAGRAPH ESSAY: TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 29, 2015