The Reasons for Marriage

 Reminders:  Article Assignment Due Monday. Be sure to include a copy of the article along with a typed or hand written response to the article. if you have any questions on the weekend. All info is on my Wiki!  “Nell” movie questions over-due.  Today’s Class Objectives:  Revisit the 3 meanings of marriage  Learn the “idea of marriage”  Discuss the various pros and cons of marriage

 Marriage is the most traditional social norm which represents one extreme of a continuum, viewing marriage as a sacred phenomenon.  This means that the family and marriage are divine and holy institutions created by God as a supreme being.  This was most widely accepted before the 20 th Century.

 Another traditional norm, widespread and widely accepted into the early 1990ss, views marriage and the family as rooted in social obligations.  The primary values of marriage and the family are to maintain social respectability, conform to kin and community wishes, and maintain a proper image within society.  Everything “bad” stayed behind closed doors.

 The third meaning of marriage suggests that families and marriages exist for the individual.  The concern is not with God or society, but with the individual.  IF people choose to marry outside their religion, ethnic group, social order, or educational level, that is their business.  According to this view, being happy in a marriage is what determines success.

 The idea of marriage is highly romanticized in our society through pop culture and the media.  Although marriage is still a popular institution, and many people marry, our society does little to prepare people for the new roles they will have to assume after marriage.  As we have studied, the rise of common-law relationships is on the rise and this could be a direct cause of the aforementioned point.

 Many religious institutions provide education and counseling programs but those not involved in church often do not have any preparation for entering marriage.  Only recently has the study of family been introduced into high school.  If you were getting married tomorrow, do you feel you would be fully prepared?

 Do the following in small groups (5-6)  Two groups will meet and brainstorm on the pros/positives and the reasons for marriage and compile a list on the provided sheets.  Two groups of will meet and brainstorm on the cons/negatives and reasons not to get marriage and compile a list on the provided sheet.  You will have 10 minutes then we will discuss the various results as a class.

 1. Emotional Support  Important to our wellbeing.  2. Commitment to a Permanent Relationship  When people marry, they expect to stay together and work at making the relationship last.  3. Primariness  Coming first with another person – having a deeper and more intimate relationship with one special person than all others is linked with the idea of permanence and monogamy.

 4. Sexual Exclusivity  For most people, marriage provides the setting that promotes sexual enjoyment and pleasure.  5. Procreation and Childbearing  In the past, many people married to have children and have economic support. Today we still want a stable relationship with children.

 1. Spite, Pity  To resolve feelings of rejection or “rebound”  2. Loneliness  To prevent isolation  3. Escape  To escape from an unhappy home situation (conflict, dictatorial parents, etc).

 4. Premarital Pregnancy  Abortion is not acceptable and to prevent an unwed pregnancy, the couple decides to marry. This often causes resentment, conflict, etc.  5. Economic Security  From spouse (pop-culture: “gold digger”).  6. Sexual Attraction  May be short lived.

 Now that you have a good sense of some of the pros/const and the positive and negatives of marriage, what do you think about it all?  In this class you have learned that there are definite upsides and downsides to marriage and it must be taken with seriousness.  The idea and concept of marriage has been thoroughly explored and now you should have a much more holistic sense of this age-old institution.  Finally, do this small informal (and anonymous) survey which I will tally for next class!