Listening and Responding to Others 4 Listening and Responding to Others

Listening and Responding to Others Communication in a Changing World The Listening Process Active and Passive Listening Obstacles to Effective Listening Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener

Communication in a Changing World Listening is a major part of communication that many of us take for granted Good listening skills are important in both our professional and personal lives Improving your listening skills will make you a better communicator, assist you in your professional life, and enrich your interpersonal relationships

Communication in a Changing World “The most called-upon prerequisite of a friend is an accessible ear.” —Maya Angelou, poet

Communication in a Changing World Hearing and Listening Hearing refers to the act of perceiving sounds or other related stimuli Listening is the process of perceiving, constructing meaning from, and responding to spoken or nonverbal messages

Communication in a Changing World Figure 4-1. Communication Time Spent Listening

The Listening Process Attending, the first stage in the listening process, involves making the conscious choice to listen Interpreting, the second stage, involves giving meaning to sounds or related stimuli

The Listening Process Figure 4-2. Stages of the Listening Process

The Listening Process Responding, the third stage of the listening process, involves any discernable reaction including both verbal and nonverbal feedback Remembering, the final stage, involves the retention and recall of messages

The Listening Process “The greatest compliment that was ever paid me was when one asked what I thought, and attended to my answer.” —Henry David Thoreau, author and philosopher

Active and Passive Listening Active listeners focus on the moment, are aware of interactions as they unfold, respond appropriately, and are aware of distractions Passive listeners expend little or no energy in the listening process

Obstacles to Effective Listening Overcoming External Distractions Physical Environment Ask speaker to pause or repeat a statement Sit closer to the speaker Turn down the volume on electronic devices Message Context Understand and pay attention to the context in which we listen to messages Media Noise Think about the influence that medium will have on the listeners ability to understand you

Obstacles to Effective Listening Overcoming Attitudinal Obstacles Preoccupation with the Self Communicators who are consistently thinking about what they are going to say instead of listening to others miss much of the meaning in messages Preconceived Attitudes and Beliefs Often interfere with our listening effectiveness by leading us to categorize messages before fully understanding them

Obstacles to Effective Listening Overcoming Attitudinal Obstacles (continued) Personal Investment Personal investment can lead to selective attention, ambushing, and avoidance of threatening information Can be triggered by semantic noise, a barrier to listening triggered by a particular word or phrase used by a speaker, or indifference, a lack of interest in listening Indifference often results in pseudolistening, or pretending to listen

Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener Identifying Listening Goals Appreciation is the goal of listening for pleasure or enjoyment Comprehension is the goal for listening for understanding

Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener “Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.” —Jimi Hendrix, rock musician

Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener Identifying Listening Goals Empathy is the goal of establishing common ground between people by acknowledging the legitimacy of feelings and giving support to others Expressive communicators verbally acknowledge how others feel and share experience Instrumental communication is listening or responding to help other solve problems or goals Evaluation is the goal of listening to render an opinion or judgment

Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener Preparing to Listen Clear your mind Eliminate distractions Set goals Take notes when listening to presentations

Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener Improving Comprehension Maintaining an Open Mind Recognize your own interests and biases Separate the message from its source Identify key points in the message Listen for unanticipated information Using Perception Checks Paraphrase in your own words what the speaker said Ask questions Identify areas of agreement with the speaker

Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener Choosing Your Response The response you make will influence what happens next in the interaction Make active choices about your feedback Be careful about using negative feedback Validate the speaker

Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener Making Communication Memorable Staying Involved While Listening The best way to remember an interaction is to make an investment in it Organizing Information To be effective, the listener must often identify key points and regroup material

Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener Applying Communication Concepts Listening and Responding During Interviews Are your questions clear and direct? How might you rephrase your questions if the respondent has difficulty understanding you? Have you thought of follow-up questions that will allow the speaker to stress points more clearly?

Summary By improving our listening skills, we strengthen the foundation for shared meaning in communication and increase satisfaction with our interpersonal relationships The four stages of the listening process are (1) attending, (2) interpreting, (3) responding, and (4) remembering

Summary Active listeners frequently remember more information than passive listeners There are many obstacles, both internal and external, to effective listening in every communication situation The four listening goals are (1) appreciation, (2) comprehension, (3) empathy, and (4) evaluation

Summary Some of the ways to listen responsibly and effectively include Preparing physically and mentally to listen Taking notes Being open-minded Using perception checks Actively providing feedback Demonstrating comprehension Staying involved Organizing material and information