My approach to individual counseling. SPIRITUALLY SENSITIVE PERSON-CENTERED COUNSELING

 My approach combines the pluralism of William James with the incongruence and empathy of Carl Rogers. WILLIAM JAMES & CARL ROGERS

 William James is the author of The Varieties of Religious Experience (1902/2004).  “Although all the special manifestations of religion may have been absurd (I mean its creeds and theories), yet the life of it as a whole is mankind’s most important function” (Letter to Miss Frances R. Morse, in The Letters of William James, vol II, 1920, p. 127). WILLIAM JAMES

 Monists view the soul as an illusion and the body as the only reality.  Dualists view the soul and body as two separate realities.  William James was a pluralist, by which he meant:  There is no system of rules that works in every situation or at all times.  He considered monism a hypothesis -- and his intuition was that it was not a correct hypothesis. WILLIAM JAMES, CON’T

1. Physical. 2.Mental. 3. Emotional. 4.Attachment issues. 5. Social/relational. 6. Spiritual. 7.Moral. 8. Creative (the ways we see and express the world differently). 9. Revolutionary (the ways in which we wish the world were different). 10.Maslow’s basic needs: physiological, safety, love and belonging, esteem. 11.Maslow’s higher needs: self-realization, self-transcendence. 12.Meaning and meaningful work. PLURALISM: AT LEAST 12 AREAS OF INCONGRUENCE, WHICH MAY OVERLAP

 We do not experience in feedback from others what we expect and want to experience and/or  We do not feel we can honestly and accurately communicate our feelings &/or thoughts in a relationship.  When we are congruent in a communication w/ another, we are authentic with that person.  If the client does not feel that there is an incongruence in their life and a need for congruence and authenticity, then no amount of counseling will result in inner or inter-personal growth.  One possible exception may be group counseling, which can inspire and resolve incongruence. INCONGRUENCE

 Psychological contact.  Incongruence in any of the 12 areas of concern for the client.  Genuineness, authenticity, & congruence from the counselor.  Unconditional positive regard and acceptance (non-possessory love/agape).  Empathy.  Perception by the client of the counselor’s empathy and acceptance.  Understanding (of the client’s emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and moral concerns, and ability to restate those accurately).  Privacy and Confidentiality.  Patience and Optimism. SPIRITUALLY SENSITIVE PERSON- CENTERED COUNSELING IS:

 The client may keep turning outside herself for guidance.  S/he may look to a moral or religious code for guidance.  S/he may look to her parents or family for guidance.  S/he may look to the counselor for answers.  The key is to keep tuning the client back into her/himself for guidance.  The counselor does this by repeating his/her understanding of the client’s meanings and feelings in each of 12 critical areas of incongruence and  Waiting for the client to re-voice her/his concerns again.  With each re-statement, the client will go deeper and arrive closer to an accurate expression of her true-self. KEEP TURNING THE CLIENT BACK TO THEIR OWN JUDGMENT

 These are all matters of process.  They all concern how to approach the client, not what the client is expected to learn.  The only additions to Rogers are explicitly naming the 12 critical areas, including spiritual and moral.  These additions are tacit and need never be made explicit unless the client leads there. PROCESS VS. CONTENT

 If counseling is all a process and just a matter of referring the client back to their own judgment, why is the counselor needed? Because:  Existential philosophy pointed out it takes two to create meaning.  Growth takes two: one to grow and the other to witness and validate that growth.  Mental health is relational experience.  Without the counselor’s prodding, we would become lazy.  Without the counselor’s reflecting our meaning accurately and empathically, we would loose faith in ourselves. WHY IS THE COUNSELOR NEEDED?

 We require some positive feedback (some smiles).  A little “yes” goes a long way. YES & NO

 For dialogue and learning and growth, we must also have a little “no,” a little negative feedback, a little conflict between our worldview and the world’s view of us.  Many person’s self-esteem is so fragile that even a little negative feedback can be devastating – especially coming from a person of power and authority such as the counselor.  They have received negative feedback all their lives: from parents, teachers, et al.  They already carry that negative, critical voice inside them.  Who are we to tell them what is “right” for them?  They must figure out what is right for them. NEGATIVE FEEDBACK

 To be effective in counseling, all the “no” must come from within the client.  It must be a “no” that is congruent with the client’s true-self, not imposed from without.  Clients can be trusted to continue to question themselves until they feel Ok about themselves alone and in relationships.  That is the goal of therapy; not for the client to behave in ways that are Ok with the therapist (or anyone else, including other family members), but to behave in ways that are Ok w/ the client’s true-self.  The counselor’s job is limited to correctly and empathically reflecting the client’s meanings and feelings in 12 problematic areas.  Then waiting for the client to re-state their own concern again: with each re-statement, the client will go a little deeper, get a little closer to expressing themselves authentically.  The client will take it from there: I believe each individual is a soul who has infinite capacity for growth – and desire to grow.  Each client knows in what ways they need and want to grow.  We, client and counselor, also need occasional breaks. NEGATIVE FEEDBACK, CONTINUED:

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