What is Love? Jacob Calkins

Definition strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties (2) : attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3) : affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests loversbenevolence

So What Does That Mean In the dictionary they make love out to be such a simple thing, but is it? Everyone has found a time in their lives where they find themselves in love with someone or something. So does this simple definition really catch the true meaning of what love really is? For some it probably could, for others it is much more complicated than that.

Why Talk About Love? Love is one of those things that is different for everyone. Everyone has their own tastes in people and also have their own expectations. Our lives have followed the same pattern for generations. We are born into this world, we grow and mature, we find love, we grow old and we die. Why is love so important though? Love is something we all need in our lives in order to feel happiness. It does not have to be towards a certain person but could even be an activity such as football or working out. Whatever it may be, we hold on to that love and run to it when we need help.

Love and Deception The media is fascinated with this idea of portraying the perfect love scenario. It can be seen in movies, books, and even television shows, that love can be perfect. The more that love becomes a prominent topic in the media the more it makes it seem that we will never find “true love”. Sex also plays a big role in this illusive idea of love. Because sex has become such a sociably acceptable thing, the human race is losing touch on “making love” with people that you are interested in.

Love At First Sight If love is so hard to find because we have this idea of a perfect relationship, is it possible to find love at first sight? It depends on who you ask. Some people might say no, others can give instances where they knew that someone was the right person as soon as they saw them. In fact 11% of 493 people that were surveyed by Ayala Malach-Pines from the University of Israel said that they found love at first sight. Love at first sight could logically happen because within the first few seconds of seeing someone you will judge them on their looks, appearance and charisma.

When You Find Love What Can It Do It all depends on who you are and what you expect from love. For some it might be the feeling of security or a way to vent feelings. Others it can be a way to heal the body and mind of all evils by overwhelming themselves with the feeling of love. “He felt his limbs growing fuller and flexible with life, his body gained an unknown strength. He was a man again, strong and rounded. And he was a child, so soothed and restored and full of gratitude. And she, she was the great bath of life, he worshipped her.”

Do You Feel Lost Without Love You may not feel lost without love, but there is definitely that desire to have someone or something in your life. Without something to run to for some sort of salvation, people find themselves not in depression but feel like they are missing out on something. A song that represents the lost feeling after you lose love is Believe by Cher –

What Attracts You To Someone It is easy to tell if you are attracted to someone as soon as you meet them. Ever heard of tall, dark and handsome? Your judgment of someone is within the first minutes you see them. But what makes you fall in love with someone? There personality is what really captivates you. If someone has the same ideas as you and also talks the same as you, you are more likely to be attracted to them.

Everyone Is Different Everyone has their own idea of love. Some people like members of the same gender, but does that make them weird or wrong? No of course not, that is why love is such a beautiful thing. There is no right or wrong answer to love, it is just what makes you happy. So why do we judge people so heavily on their relationships? Ignorance and Envy. People are close minded to the different views of people and think that their opinion is the only one that matters. Also they actually envy the fact that people are happy with their partners when they are either not in a relationship or currently struggling with one.

Personal Opinion Love is a difficult thing to grasp especially because there are so many people in the world and so many opportunities to find new people. I feel as though I have found true love before so I know what it feels like to have someone or something that I would do anything for. I fell in love with two things, the sport of football and my high school sweetheart. Football was an easy way for me to vent all my hostility and anger out while still having fun. I would do anything to be out on the field and play with my teammates. At the same time finding my love in the sport of football I found my high school sweetheart. I genuinely loved this girl and would do anything for her. Day in and day out we would talk about anything that came to mind. She was my best friend but my lover at the same time. Yes we got intimate with each other but that was not what it was all about. For me it was having that person that I could go to and no have to worry about being judged. I could tell her how I felt about anything and she was there with an open mind and an open heart. Sadly it ended and of course I was heartbroken. Although I was heartbroken not once did I think that I could never find another person that would make me feel the way she did. Love will always make its way back to you, you just have to be willing and able to accept it.

Personal Interviews

Bibliography Featherstone, Mike. "The Lost Innocence of Love." Love and Eroticism. London: Sage, Print. Fisher, Helen. "Love at First Sight - Helen Fisher Love Column - Oprah.com." Oprah.com. N.p., n.d. Web. 24 Apr Lawrence, D. H. "Death and Love." Women in Love. New York: Modern Library, N. pag. Print. May, Rollo. Love and Will. New York: Norton, Print. Merriam-Webster. The Merriam Webster Dictionary. Merriam Webster.: n.p., n.d. Print