Coach Michele’s Group Coaching July 19, 2011

2Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Today’s Topic Mastery – The Power of Beliefs

3Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 How to Participate If you’d like to participate in the call, please press 5* If you’d like to just listen, don’t press 5* If you change your mind, you can always press 5* again to change your status

4Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Opening Q’s Before we start, I’d like to open the call to questions…It can be a follow up to last week, a success or personal development question, a question about your own life, a question about coaching, a comment or observation, or anything at all!

5Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Introduction Today we are going to talk about beliefs: What are beliefs? Why do they matter? How can our beliefs be "invisible"? How do we discover beliefs? How do we change beliefs? The role of emotional attachment How to use beliefs in coaching

6Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Beliefs Beliefs are simply thoughts that we think a lot

7Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Opening Discussion Do you tend to think much about your beliefs? Have you done belief work? What was your experience?

8Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Exercise You’ll need three pieces of paper On the first page, write down the following categories: MoneyCareer Love Life Social Life Family Life Body/Health Spiritual (spiritual, personal development, learning, etc.) Rate each of the categories, from 1 to 10, 10 being the highest, in terms of the current conditions in your life.

9Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Exercise, Page 2 Circle the category you rated the highest, and write that category name at the top of a blank piece of paper For two minutes, write as many thoughts as you can related to that topic, don’t analyze, just write as fast as you can – for Example, if you rated body/health the highest, you might write things like…I like my body, I am in great health, I love how my hair looks, exercise makes you strong, etc, all your thoughts about the Health/body topic Now, we are going to do the same with the category we rated the lowest

10Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Exercise Discussion Now, much of what you wrote for each heading can probably be termed beliefs – thoughts that you think fairly often Was this hard to do? Easy to do? What do you notice about your lists? Is there a difference between the area you rated high and the area you rated low?

11Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Why Beliefs Matter Unless you are in a period of transition, you’ll probably notice that your thoughts about each area of your life are a perfect match for the conditions. That is no coincidence We THINK that we believe things about reality…It’s actually the opposite…Reality is, what we believe it to be

12Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Quote and Discussion The thing always happens that you really believe in; and the belief in a thing makes it happen. Frank Lloyd Wright What if it really is true that what we believe determines our experience…What are the implications and ramifications of that?

13Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Invisible Beliefs We rely on our perceptions to tell us what is happening Our perceptions are filtered through our beliefs This is one of the main roles of the left brain So, we see what we expect to see Beliefs begin to hide as truth!

14Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Invisible Beliefs 2 Let’s say someone has the belief “people don’t like me” Their brain will specifically notice occasions that fit this belief model of reality Things that don’t fit the model will be rejected/not noticed/downplayed/explained away If you say to that person, hey, that’s just a belief, that people don’t like you…They’ll say, of course not, it’s a fact, and they’ll have tons of evidence to back it up. Because we filter our perceptions through our beliefs, they always WILL appear to be facts The beliefs become invisible to the believer, because they are just “facts” of their reality Thoughts/questions?

15Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Discovering Beliefs Even though I just showed you how beliefs can be invisible, they are hiding in plain sight! You simply need to start to become aware of the contents of your mind An exercise like we did a few minutes ago is a perfect method If you are challenged in a certain area of your life, you need to start paying attention to your thoughts (and you can also look around you to see your beliefs in action!) Thoughts/Questions

16Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Changing Beliefs Remember, beliefs are simply thoughts thought often To change your beliefs, you need to consciously, proactively choose and create your thoughts – remember the thoughts you choose will be designing your experience and your life Our right-brains play a special part in this

17Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Role of the Right Hemisphere Scientists are discovering that the role of the right-brain includes taking a fresh look at reality and suggesting changes to the beliefs of the left brain If the left-brain (ego) is emotionally attached to the beliefs, it may not want to let them go! This can cause confusion, angst, conflict, befuddlement, stuckness, etc.

18Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Belief Transition Example For example, let’s say a person developed a belief: I am the smartest in my class.For example, let’s say a person developed a belief: I am the smartest in my class. When they were younger it worked well for them, they experienced themselves as bright, they expected to perform well, so they did, and it gave them a lot of confidence. Some might have said they had a bit of an ego, but it didn’t bother them too much.When they were younger it worked well for them, they experienced themselves as bright, they expected to perform well, so they did, and it gave them a lot of confidence. Some might have said they had a bit of an ego, but it didn’t bother them too much. But, when they got to college, things were a little different. The right-brain was suggesting, hey, maybe we aren’t the smartest in the class after all. The ego may find this very threatening…It is emotionally attached to being the smartest…It would be too scary to not be the smartest!But, when they got to college, things were a little different. The right-brain was suggesting, hey, maybe we aren’t the smartest in the class after all. The ego may find this very threatening…It is emotionally attached to being the smartest…It would be too scary to not be the smartest! Because of the emotional attachment, the person may experience some discombobulation for a timeBecause of the emotional attachment, the person may experience some discombobulation for a time But if they let themselves evolve, prompted by the right-brain, they may develop a new belief that helps them even more, and is a better fit for reality…”I am one of many smart people in my class. We all have intelligent thoughts to offer. I can learn from these people!”But if they let themselves evolve, prompted by the right-brain, they may develop a new belief that helps them even more, and is a better fit for reality…”I am one of many smart people in my class. We all have intelligent thoughts to offer. I can learn from these people!”

19Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Beliefs and Coaching When people transform, part of what they are happening is they are changing beliefs, whether expressly discussed or understood or not. Certain coaching questions are great belief looseners: How do you know that? What if that weren’t true? Can you be absolutely sure that that is true? What if the opposite were true? How would it feel if the opposite were true? When people really start to look at how they are thinking, much of what they are thinking doesn’t stand up to rational scrutiny! As much as possible, let your clients discover for themselves what doesn’t make sense for them any more In general a person that is open, without a minimum of preconcieved notions, will suffer the least, be most conscious of what is actually happening, will evolve the fastest, and be most effective in the moment

20Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Final Discussion What are your final thoughts or things you’d like to add about beliefs? What are you going to take away from this call?

21Copyright (c) Michele Caron, 2011 Next Session Next session: Tuesday, August 2nd This is our success call Have a fantastic couple of weeks!