Healthy vs. Unhealthy Relationships Source: CALM

Healthy Relationships Have the Following Characteristics: Talking about your feelings Respecting date’s friends and activities Considering the other person’s opinions and feelings Respecting differences in other people Stating differences of opinion Having an equal say in the relationship Figuring out a solution that is good for both of you

Unhealthy Relationships Have the Following Characteristics: Believing one sex has more rights than the other Shouting or yelling when you are angry at your date Using the silent treatment Pestering our date until you get what you want Pouting to get what you want

Abusive Relationships Have the Following Characteristics: Dominating & controlling your date’s other relationships and activities Name calling (putdowns) Threatening harm Intimidating by hitting or destroying property Being extremely jealous and possessive of your date Pushing, hitting, restraining or holding your date against his/her will Forcing sexual touching or intercourse

Types of Abusive Relationships Intimidation (threatening violence) Emotional Abuse (putdowns, silent treatment) Sexual Abuse Physical Abuse Isolation (keeping someone from having other friends, jealousy)

If You Think Your Friend is Being Abused: Listen and believe your friend Identify the abuse behaviour to your friend Tell your friend “You are not to blame” If your friend chooses not to leave, help create a safety plan Continue to be a friend even if you are frustrated by decisions or actions Get new ideas on how to help your friend from people such as community counsellors

If You Think Your Friend is Being Abusive Confront your friend and name abusive behaviours when you see them Challenge your friend’s stereotyping and putdowns of people Talk about the consequences of violence Encourage your friend to get help Be there for your friend when they accept responsibility and get help