Drawing the Line Learning About Sexual Assault Lesson 7

Ground Rules To create a safe environment: Do not use put downs. Be sensitive to others. You have the right to privacy/confidentiality. Use correct terminology. Do not divulge private information. There are no dumb questions. Talk to your parents for more information.

Introduction Today we will be discussing the crime of sexual assault. In the 2013 YRBS, 8% of 9 th –12 th grade students in SDUSD reported being forced to have sexual intercourse when they did not want to. In most sexual assaults, the perpetrator and target know each other. Both males and females can be perpetrators or targets of sexual assault.

What is Sexual Assault? Sexual assault is not about sexual attraction, it is about power and control over another person. What are some things that give a person power and control in a relationship? – –Age – –Strength – –Popularity – –Money

Sexual Assault Sexual Assault is a violent felony crime: Includes child sexual abuse, acquaintance rape and rape Motivated by power and control Most often perpetrated by males against females – –Males can also be targeted. – –Females can also be perpetrators. – –Assault can occur between people of the same sex.

Types of Sexual Assault Rape – –Unwanted sexual intercourse – –May include force, threats, fear of injury Child Abuse* – –A person of any age involved with a minor < 14 years old – –The victim is < 16 years old and the suspect is older than 21 – –Usually a felony Unlawful Sexual Intercourse** – –A person having sexual intercourse with anyone < 18 years – –May be a felony if more than a 3 year age difference CA Penal Code Sections 289* and 261.5**

Types of Sexual Assault Sexual Battery (Felony) – –Victim is held or restrained – –Skin-to-skin touching of body parts – –Example: Student pushes another student against a wall, reaches under her shirt and touches her breast Sexual Battery (Misdemeanor) – –Victim is not held or restrained – –Touching of body parts over/under clothing – –Example: Grabbing a student’s groin area

Scenario 1: Ty and Carrie Ty and Carrie go to a party in Mission Beach with a group of friends. Couples start pairing off, and Carrie and Ty end up in one of the bedrooms. Carrie enjoys kissing Ty, but she is not ready to have sex with him. It is their first time alone and things move pretty fast. His hands are under her shirt and she keeps telling him NO. Ty thinks that even though Carrie is saying NO, she really likes the way he is touching her. Ty continues to touch Carrie and she is afraid he won’t stop.

Ty and Carrie 1. 1.Is Ty committing a crime? 2. 2.What do you think is going on with Ty? 3. 3.What do you think is going on with Carrie? 4. 4.What could have prevented this from happening?

Scenario 2: After the Game One of the varsity teams has just finished a game and players are joking around in the locker room. The joking turns physical and Joe gets tackled by a couple of teammates. As the rest of the team stands around, two players hold Joe down against his will and pull off his shorts. One of the guys grabs a golf club and tries to stick the handle into Joe’s rectum. Joe is terrified and is able to get away, so there is only slight contact.

After the Game 1. 1.How would you describe this behavior? 2. 2.Who is guilty here? 3. 3.Is this harmless behavior since they are all teammates?

Scenario 3: Brandy and Damon Brandy, a college junior, and Damon, a high school freshman, met at a party. Brandy was friends with Damon’s brother and knew Damon was still a “virgin.” Brandy thought it would be funny to be the first to have sex with him. Brandy’s friends encouraged her to go for it. Brandy was getting drunk and started flirting with Damon and rubbing against him. While Damon was flattered by the attention, he was really uncomfortable and did not want to have sexual contact with Brandy. When he tried to move away, Brandy pursued him and accused him of being gay.

Brandy and Damon 1. 1.Was Brandy’s behavior okay? 2. 2.What are some “red flags”? 3. 3.What do you think is going on with Damon?

Scenario 4: Dan and Jennifer For the past two months, senior Dan has been seeing sophomore Jennifer. She goes to his house when his parents are out of town and they start fooling around. She says she isn’t ready to have sex with him and they stop before intercourse. He pressures her by saying he knows she had sex with her previous boyfriend. That night he keeps pressing the issue and each time he asks she says “NO.” She must have said “NO” fifteen times. She became so tired of his pressuring her that she finally agrees.

Dan and Jennifer 1. 1.Is this rape? 2. 2.What are some “red flags”? 3. 3.What are some observations you can make about Dan and Jennifer’s relationship? Any advice for them?

How Do Gender Stereotypes Contribute to Sexual Assault? Think about the discussion on gender stereotyping from Lesson 1. Do you think gender stereotypes contribute to the perpetuation of sexual assault? How can males and females work together to end sexual assault?

What Everyone Should Know Know your sexual limits and communicate them. Always respect another person’s limits. Don’t assume you know what another person wants. Be up front with friends. Be assertive. It is never okay to have sex with someone without their consent. Having sex with someone who is mentally or physically unable to consent is rape. Ask for help if you feel threatened or unsafe.

If Sexual Assault Occurs Call the police (911). Contact a Crisis Hotline: Tell someone you trust and ask for support. If it happens to a friend, offer support. Save your clothing from the attack and do not shower. Remember that you are not responsible for the assault.

Summary Set clear boundaries and communicate them. Trust and act on your feelings. Everyone has the right to say “NO.” Talk to a school counselor, parent or trusted adult.