Welcome to Unit 5.

● Good transitions between paragraphs allow ideas to flow naturally. Choosing just the right transitional word or phrase can enhance the essay and make it easier to follow and understand.

Reading: For this week’s reading, we’ll look at words that we can use as transitions to help our reader follow us from point to point in our essay. Seminar: This week’s seminar is about revision. Please bring some of your work to class to post to the seminar space and work on together. Discussion: Our discussion this week will focus on transitional words. After going through the readings for the unit, post some of your that contains transitions to the db and let’s see how well we’re handling this concept. Project: Turn in your final draft of the process essay.

To Compare: ● alike, ● in the same way ● likewise, similarity, resembling

To Reflect Differences: ● but, still, however ● although, on the other hand ● while this may be true, though, despite, granted, on the contrary

To Add an Idea :  Furthermore  Also  in addition to  Further  Besides  too

To Show Time :  while, after, when, meanwhile, now, once, simultaneously

What does it mean to revise? To edit? Are they the same thing?

WHY do we revise and edit?

Revision = RE + VISION From the Latin revisere: “To see again” What do we look for when we revise?

1. “Whole-paper” issues / Higher-order concerns (HOCs) 2. Refine focus 3. Reassess purpose 4. Double-check the thesis 5. Check balance and organization 6. Consider audience

 Add  Remove  Move  Substitute

Next…we will discuss editing and revision. if revising is working on big issues, what do you think editing and proofreading is all about?

Every paper can be improved – no paper is at its best after the first draft. Each time you revise you catch little things that could be done better. Now, let’s learn about revision and editing.

 Revision is simply reseeing what you have written. Before you begin revising-- review your plan, your initial outline.

 Creating an outline of your draft helps you to make sure that your points work together.  It lets you see the continuity, unity, organization, examples, development.  It allows you to see if your paper has focus, clarity, and depth, or is it all generalizations with no support to prove or illustrate your points.

 Is this the focus –Is the focus of the thesis the point you want to prove in your essay?

 Do you have enough information? Support? Evidence?

Do you need to Add -- a word, a sentence, a paragraph? Use the acronym PREFACTS to check for support and details –  P ersonal experiences or observations  R easons  E xamples  F acts  A nalogies (comparisons)  C oncrete sensory images  T estimony  S tatistics.

Do you need to Add -- a word, a sentence, a paragraph? Use the acronym PREFACTS to check for support and details –  P ersonal experiences or observations  R easons  E xamples  F acts  A nalogies (comparisons)  C oncrete sensory images  T estimony  S tatistics.

 Word, sentence, or paragraph  “Lard” in the form of redundancies  “Dead would”  Repetition: return back, climb up  Cliches  Irrelevant information

 A section might be more effective earlier or later in the essay.  A sentence might be better at the end of the paragraph or at the beginning.

 Did you use "you", when your essay should be third person?  Is there a more specific word, a better illustration or example?  Did you use the same term over and over?  Did you use vague phrases such as "It is said..." "An article I read stated...." Be specific-- who said it? What was the name of the article?

 Your writing decisions include choosing the right words, use words precisely, use concrete words, use verbs that create action and strong images, use words that have distinct connotation. For example… Is the resort cabin a rustic cottage or a seedy shack?

Make notes on your draft in a DIFFERENT COLOR PEN OR PENCIL that way they will stand out.

Editing is the final polishing. It is checking:  Spelling  Punctuation  Grammar  Capitalization  Citation and MLA format

Wrap-up Every paper can be improved – no paper is at its best after the first draft. Each time you revise you catch little things that could be done better.