Life Works, Character Counts and the Friends of the Blake Library Present Teen Talk Speaker: Susan Dockerill Founder of Life Works Parenting Tools
Teen Talk Relationship Communication New Direction
RELATIONSHIP Nothing Works if the Relationship doesn’t work.
POWER Power Over Blame Others Angry Power Under Blame Self Guilt/Permissive Personal Power Take 100% Responsibility Empowered In Control of Your Life
FEAR False Evidence Appearing Real
ACT A Way of behaving when things don’t go your way. 3 to 5 years old
PAST Being right Attitude It’s not my fault Fighting Anger Out of Control Blame No Responsibility Life’s Unfair Lying No trust I didn’t do it Fear Anxiety Depression Arguments Hurt I hate you!
Feeling Stoppers Moralize Lecture Humiliate Interrupt Calling names ignoring Punishing Sarcasm Comparing to others Rescuing Assuming Making her feel guilty
If nothing changes the future will resemble the past. Default Future PastNOWFuture
RELATIONSHIP Re-Establish The Relationship Focus on what you want to have happen in the relationship. Clean up your part in why the relationship doesn’t work What are you attached to? What are you committed to?
Feeling Encouragers Listen Intently “What Else” Be Curious “Tell me some more” Then what happened?” Validate Feelings “ I can see you are really upset about this” Empathy “If I were you I’d feel the same way”
Communication How People Perform Correlates to how the situation occurs to them. How a situation occurs includes your view of the past (Why things are the way they are) and the future (where all this is going) Our actions relate to how the world occurs to us, not to the way it actually is.
If nothing changes the future will resemble the past. Default Future PastNOWFuture
RACKETS Complaint Act Pay Off Cost
Attatatchments Cell Phone IPOD Computer MY SPACE Being popular Not looking stupid Grades Computer TV Sex Clothes Weight Sports Friends Skateboarding Drugs and Drinking
What will happen if nothing changes?
If nothing changes the future will resemble the past. Default Future PastNOWFuture
Learn How To Live Powerfully and Love the Life You Live! Redirecting Children/Teen Behavior RCB BOOK and Workbook 5 Thursday Evenings 7:00 9:00pm May 21, 28 June 4,11,18
NOW WORD
What if you could learn how to communicate in a way… Touch Move Inspire
Attatatchments Cell Phone IPOD Computer MY SPACE Being popular Not looking stupid Grades Computer TV Sex Clothes Weight Sports Friends Skateboarding Drugs and Drinking
Word +Action = New Possibilities Invented Future PastNOWFuture
NOW WORD
Commitment Peace in your home Love Forgiving Taking Care of Yourself Friendship Financial Freedom Mutual Respect Happiness Listening Love Caring Keeping your word Living your dream Responsibility
RELATIONSHIP Re-Establish The Relationship Focus on what you want to have happen in the relationship. Clean up your part in why the relationship doesn’t work What are you attached to? What are you committed to?
TeensUniteUSA.COM New Possibility Website Connecting Teens to Careers Volunteer hours Peer Teen Coaching Teen Tutoring
NEW POSSIBILITES What is possible for you after tonight’s seminar? What are you committed to? What action will you take to keep this going?