Interpersonal Interventions Goal: To eliminate or reduce stress factors that involve other people

Assertiveness Skills Assertive Behavior: The ability to express yourself and satisfy your own needs. Feel good about this and not hurt other in the process.

Non-Assertive Behavior Denying your own wishes to satisfy someone else’s. Sacrificing your own needs to meet someone else’s needs. May be described as co-dependent behavior.

Aggressive Behavior Seeking to dominate or to get your own way at the expense of others. May be described as manipulative behavior

Assertive Behavior and Stress Relationship exists between stress and your ability to meet your needs. Non-assertive people have unmet needs, leading to dissatisfaction and stress. Aggressive people meet their needs at others expense - frequently have pattern of unsuccessful relationships.

Seven Basic Human Needs A sense of safety and structure A sense of belonging/group membership A sense of self worth and contributing A sense of independence and control over ones life A sense of closeness /relationships A sense of competence/mastery A sense of self awareness

Nonverbal Assertiveness Stand up straight, face people when they talk to you, look them in the eye Speak in a clear, steady voice Speak fluently, without hesitation, with confidence

Verbal Assertiveness: DESC Form (1) Step 1: Describe: Paint a verbal picture of the other person’s behavior or situation. “When you……..” Note: Address the behavior-not person (behaviors can be bad, not people)

Verbal Assertiveness: DESC Form (2) Step 2: Express: Express your feelings about the other person’s behavior or situation. “I feel ________” Note: Don not say “you make me feel____”

Verbal Assertiveness: DESC Form (3) Step 3: Specify: Describe in detail how you would like the other person’s behavior to change. “I would prefer….like….________” Note: This is a request, not an order”

Verbal Assertiveness: DESC Form (4) Step 4: Consequences: Select consequences you have decided to apply to the person’s behavior or situation. Describe what you will do or will not not do. “If you_______, I will______” “If you don’t_______, I will________” Note: Only select consequences you are willing to follow through with.

Conflict Resolution Allow enough time to resolve issue Listen - pay attention to what is being said, reflect info. back to person. Begin with agreement “I agree that this is a stressful situation…..” Avoid following this statement with a “but” Offer alternative or solution Use “I” Statements Avoid asking “why”