SELF-ESTEEM

Workshop Overview Self-Esteem…What is it? Self-Esteem…What’s it made of? Types of Self-esteem The secret to improving Self-esteem

Self-Esteem…What is it? Self-esteem refers to the way we see and think about ourselves.

Self-Esteem…What’s it made of? Your self-esteem is made up of all the experiences and interpersonal relationships you’ve had in your life. Everyone you’ve ever met has added to or taken away from how you see yourself!

The Effects of High Self-Esteem People with high self-esteem possess the following characteristics: -They like to meet new people. -They don’t worry about how others will judge them. -They have the courage to express themselves. -Their lives are enriched with each new encounter.

-They are nicer to be around. -Their ideas are met with interest because others want to hear what they have to say. -They are magnets to positive opportunities! People with high self-esteem have an “I think I can” attitude!

Benefits of high self-esteem More persistent at a difficult task Increased respect for oneself and behave in ways that encourage others to respect (Me)more Improve unconscious behavior Feel better, live better

The impact of self-esteem on our lives: How we operate in the workplace School Home How we chose our friends Who we fall in love with

Average self-esteem: Fluctuate between feeling appropriate and inappropriate Sometimes act wisely, sometimes foolishly Inconsistent in behavior This relationship with self reflects relationships with others

What causes low self-esteem? Overly critical Parents Significant childhood losses Parental abuse Parental alcoholism and drug addiction Parental neglect/overprotectiveness Parental rejection Parental overindulgence

The Effects of Low Self-Esteem People with low self-esteem possess the following characteristics: -They don’t believe in themselves. -They see themselves failing before they begin. -They have a hard time forgiving their mistakes and make themselves pay the price forever. -They believe they can never be as good as they should be or as others.

-They are afraid to show their creativity because they will be ridiculed. -They are dissatisfied with their lives. -They spend most of their time alone. -They complain and criticize. -They worry about everything and do nothing. People with low self-esteem have an “I can’t do it” attitude.

How can we improve our self- esteem? Living more consciously Taking good care of yourself The practice of self-acceptance The practice of self-responsibility Self assertiveness Developing support and intimacy The practice of personal integrity

The practice of living consciously: Watch your thoughts…do you find yourself saying: I know I am not doing my best but I do not want to think about it. I know the way I eat is wrecking my health but…. I know I am living beyond my means, but…

Living consciously means: Being in the moment A concern to understand the world around me A commitment to learning To seek clarity Be aware of values that motivate me Distinguish between facts and feelings

Self acceptance Self-esteem is something we experience, self-acceptance is something we do. Refusal to be in an adversarial relationship with self. Listening to feelings can lead to a deeper awareness of important information

Self- assertiveness/responsibility Willingness to stand up for self Protecting boundaries To live by your values Learn to be kind without self-sacrificing Cooperate with others without betraying our standards and convictions

Living purposefully To live productively Translating thoughts into reality Answering questions such as: What am I trying to achieve ? Why do I think these means are appropriate ? Does the feedback from the environment convey that I am succeeding or failing ?

The practice of personal integrity Is the integration of ideals, standards, beliefs and behaviors When our behavior is congruent with our professed values, when ideals and practice match, we have integrity When we have lapses in integrity it is detrimental to our self-esteem

One of the biggest enemies to high self-esteem is Laziness: We do not challenge our inertia We do not chose to be “awake” We do not wish to experience discomfort The greatest problem is that it becomes a vicious cycle and our “laziness” or inaction damages our self-esteem and we tend to become more lazy.

12 Steps to High Self-Esteem (Reading) Step 1 -Forgive yourself for past mistakes. Step 2 -Focus on your positive attributes. Step 3 -Follow the example of successful people. Step 4 -Become a self talker.

Step 5 -Exhibit a good attitude. Step 6 -Get plenty of rest. Step 7 -Make your work skills your own Step 8 -Practice your talents

Step 9 -Become physically fit. Step 10 -Learn new things. Step 11 -Improve your personal relationships. Step 12 -Dress well!

Final Thought You are a unique individual. No one else is like you in the whole world. This makes you special already! Our time in this world is limited. Make it happen for you so you leave your mark in history!