Identity A Sense of Who You Are

What makes up your identity? Combination of personality, abilities, strengths, weaknesses, interests, and values Continually shaped by every experience Never final Ultimately a mystery Composed of millions of bits of information

Why is it important to develop a sense of who you are? Helps us make better choices College Career Family Helps us deepen and develop our relationships Gives us a greater appreciation for ourselves and others Self-esteem: an understanding of our own worth and an attitude of cherishing ourselves

Story of Zach What are some of Zach’s personality traits? Which ones does Zach recognize? Which ones does Lisa draw out?

Knowing Yourself What am I feeling? What do I want? What are people telling me? What are my talents? What is out of my control? What is within my limited control?

What am I feeling? What do you remember about feelings?

Feelings Can be friends or dictators Do not let them take over

Make a list of 5 things that you really want either today or in the near future.

What do you want? Know wants and desires Need to know what we truly want Society constantly tells us what we want Forms our identity and shapes our life

Make a list of characteristics that you think teachers would use to describe you.

How does this make you feel? What do we need to do to change that?

What are people telling you? Relationships provide millions of pieces of data about you All of these pieces contribute to a sense of who you are Must examine what we learn about ourselves from others Ex: wild trouble maker Ex: Blue eyed/Brown eyed experiment

What are your talents? Talent: ability or aptitude that has value Gift in the sense that you are born with it Not always physical or intellectual Can be aspects of our personality Listening Compassionate

What is out of our control? The gifts/talents we are born with What we do with our talents is within our limited control

Certain factors that are out of our control Cosmic: born, die, natural disasters Genetic: genes affect our appearance, health, aptitudes, talents, personality traits Cultural: family, country, region, particular, religious, ethnic, economic setting Circumstantial: major historic events, accidents, chance meetings affect us, shape us

We have some control over how we respond to these Move with the grace of God

Healthy ability to shape life and actions Autonomy Healthy ability to shape life and actions

Why is it important to develop autonomy? Acting responsibly and shaping your own affairs brings about a more secure sense of identity

What does autonomy involve? Making choices that have consequences-realizing that you have to live with the consequences Making choices according to our best understanding of things Interdependence: delicate and healthy blend of independence and dependence

Gaining Independence from Family Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, intellectually, financially independent of parents

2 Kinds of False Autonomy Groupthink: make a sharp break from parents and Take on a different group’s thoughts/ideas Trading one form of dependency for another Pregnancy or Marriage Similar to groupthink See it as a way to escape their family

Learning Interdependence Capable of give and take Trusting themselves and others

Lessons of Interdependence Be sensitive to the needs of others Consider others points of views and, when necessary, to change Becoming aware of own resources so you are confident, not threatened, when involved in conflict Recognizing we need help

Freedom “Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose.” Who is the person in society who has nothing left to lose?

Christian Freedom We can see the big picture beyond our own narrow interests, and are able to respond to the needs of real situations and real people Include responsibility We grow and express ourselves within the context of others needs as well as our own

Christian Freedom Acting freely means that we consider the entire situation and respond according to the good for all Freedom is seen in the context of freedom from sin and freedom to love

Personal Power The ability to influence our own life and the people and events around us Christians are meant to be powerful people who empower others We need power The deprivation of power, can lead to violence and tragedy