How could you improve the email (letter) below? VA FEEDBACK  Extending ideas VA FEEDBACK  Extending ideas.

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How could you improve the (letter) below? VA FEEDBACK  Extending ideas VA FEEDBACK  Extending ideas

LO: how can I improve my response for the Writing section of the exam? C/W20 th May

Did I get your level right? Highlight the different sentence types

School Librarian

Hardworking, polite Like reading Play sports Book monitor in Primary School Want to be an English teacher when I am older How do you plan?

School Librarian 1. Hardworking, polite Like reading Play sports Book monitor in Primary School Want to be an English teacher when I am older How do you plan?

School Librarian 1. Hardworking, polite 1. Like reading Play sports Book monitor in Primary School Want to be an English teacher when I am older How do you plan?

School Librarian 1. Hardworking, polite 1. Like reading Play sports 2. Book monitor in Primary School Want to be an English teacher when I am older How do you plan?

School Librarian 1. Hardworking, polite 1. Like reading 3. Play sports 2. Book monitor in Primary School Want to be an English teacher when I am older How do you plan?

School Librarian 1. Hardworking, polite 1. Like reading 3. Play sports 2. Book monitor in Primary School 4. Want to be an English teacher when I am older How do you plan? Introduction? Conclusion?

Dear Mrs Carew, I am ing you regarding the position of pupil-librarian. I would very much like to be considered for the role and believe I have all the characteristics to be a success.

In conclusion, I would like to thank you for taking the time to read my letter and I hope to hear from you soon. Yours Faithfully, ___________

Dear Mrs Carew, I am ing you regarding the position of pupil-librarian. I would very much like to be considered for the role and believe I have all the characteristics to be a success. Firstly, Secondly/Also, Thirdly/In addition/Furthermore In conclusion, I would like to thank you for taking the time to read my letter and I hope to hear from you soon. Yours Faithfully, ___________

VA FEEDBACK  Extending ideas  Organising ideas  Sentence structure: accurate, ambitious and varied VA FEEDBACK  Extending ideas  Organising ideas  Sentence structure: accurate, ambitious and varied

How could you improve the (letter) below?