What do you think about the fact that… Traditionally, it is the man’s responsibility to propose marriage. Brides have showers and receive gifts for the home, while grooms have bachelors’ parties to “live it up” one last time? Carrying the bride over the threshold symbolizes the ancient method of marriage by capture? Brides to be wear engagement rings to show that they are already “taken”? Traditionally, the bride’s father “gives her away”?

Marriage Plans Jacob, age 92 and Rebecca, age 89, living in Florida are excited about their decision to get married. They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding, and on the way they pass a drugstore. Jacob suggests they go in. Jacob addresses the man behind the counter: “Are you the owner?” The pharmacist answers, “Yes.”

Jacob: “We’re about to get married. Do you sell heart medication?” Pharmacist: “Of course we do.” Jacob: “How about medication for circulation?” Pharmacist: “All kinds.” Jacob: “Medicine for rheumatism and scoliosis?” Pharmacist: “Definitely.” Jacob: “How about Viagra?” Pharmacist: “Of course.”

Jacob: “Medicine for memory problems, arthritis, jaundice?” Pharmacist: “Yes, a large variety. The works.” Jacob: What about vitamins, sleeping pills, Geritol, antidotes for Parkinson’s disease?” Pharmacist: “Absolutely” Jacob: “You sell wheel chairs and walkers?” Pharmacist: “All speeds and sizes.” Jacob: “We’d like to use this store as our Bridal Registry.”

Ch Making Wedding Plans In some ways, planning a wedding is a preview of how a couple will work together in marriage. They make choices and accept compromises. They try to accommodate each other’s family and friends and they see each other under stress.

I. The Ceremony Few occasions in people’s lives are treasured the way weddings are. Cultures around the world have created different rituals, but whatever form, a wedding symbolizes the personal and spiritual union of a woman and a man. It is a formal and legal expression also of their commitment.

II. Contracts and Customs When a couple marries, they enter into a contract with each other. A contract is a legal and binding agreement between two or more people. Marriage is a contract overseen by the state and made official with a marriage license.

A. Marriage Laws 1.Minimum age 2.Mental soundness 3.Forbidden to marry people with close blood ties such as a cousin. 4.Marriage is regulated by each state. Couples must be sure they meet the requirements of the state where the ceremony will take place. Their marriage will be valid in every state. 5.Many states require a blood test to check for sexually transmitted diseases. 6.Each state has a time frame for obtaining a license. 7.The marriage must be performed by an authorized person and be witnessed. 8.The license becomes valid when the person who marries the couple and the witnesses sign the license.

Marriage License in Missouri ID Requirements: You will need to apply for your marriage license at the Recorder of Deeds office in any county. You will need identification and your Social Security Number. Residency Requirements: You do not have to be a resident of Missouri. Previous Marriages: You need to show the date your last marriage ended (final divorce decree) and wait at least 30 days after the final decree before getting married again. Waiting Period: There is a three day waiting period. This can be waived by a judge if the situation makes getting married earlier “advisable” Fees: $51 plus $1 fee for each parental consent (CASH ONLY) Other test: Missouri does not require any medical or blood tests. Proxy marriage, cousin marriage, common law marriage, or covenant marriage option: NO

Same sex marriages: No, in August 2004, voters in Missouri overwhelmingly approved a state amendment to the constitution banning same-sex marriage. Under 18: If either of you are under 18 years of age, you must have the consent form of a custodial parent or your legal guardian. If you are under 15 years of age, you will need the approval of a county judge. However, according to State Law, he can only grant approval due to “good cause” or that the conditions surrounding the situation make the marriage “advisable” Officiates: Any ordained minister, active or retired, who is in good standing with congregation; Circuit Court or Associate Circuit Court Judge (cannot receive money for performing the ceremony); Marriage Commissioners and Judges (Circuit Court, District Court, or Retired) in Missouri may also perform civil weddings. Where to get a copy of Certificates of Marriage: Missouri Department of Health and Senior Services

B. Prenuptial Agreements Additional agreements before the wedding. They typically deal with three main issues: 1. Protecting Property 2. Establishing Ownership 3. Defining Roles

C. Ceremonies 1.Civil Ceremony- performed by a judge, justice of the peace, or other appropriate official. 2.Religious Ceremony- officiated by a religious official such as a minister, rabbi or priest. The reading of vows and music all reflect the couples beliefs. 3.Usually a reception of some type follows a wedding ceremony to celebrate a marriage.

D. Customs Vary according to ethnic background, religion, and even geography. Some common traditions are 1. Exchange of rings to symbolize unity and timelessness. 2. Engagement parties and showers. 3. Sometimes couples customize their wedding vows. Self written vows should be checked with a religious or civil authority to make sure they are legally binding.