The key to good communication J. O'Connor & A. Lages Adapted by M. Doe Building Rapport The key to good communication J. O'Connor & A. Lages Adapted by M. Doe

What is Rapport? Rapport is a relationship of mutual respect, responsiveness and influence It is an ongoing process Its an honest attempt to understand another person from their world A willingness to be open – it is not agreement It is possible to have good rapport and strongly disagree

Respect Values and Beliefs In order to build rapport you need to have respect for the clients beliefs and values ~ you do not have to agree with them It’s a willingness to see events from their perspective The person is the embodiment of their beliefs and values ~ we all are

Matching Behaviour How do you show your respect and willingness to understand? People like people who are like them We all have a natural ability/skill to match people We do this all the time in our work settings, home and socially

Matching Behaviour Think of situations you are in on a regular basis Notice similar body movement and gestures when you get on well You are likely to have similar beliefs and values It is entirely possible to match someone where you do not have similar beliefs

Voice Tone People who have a good relationship tend to speak at much the same speed and volume The rate of speech and the latency (pauses) will even out People in close rapport will even be breathing at the same rate

Behavioural level This rapport is on the level of behaviour It must come from a sincere desire to enter and understand the other persons model or map of the world It is easy, powerful and you do this all the time You may notice that you already do this and already have the ability to build good rapport with clients

Pay Attention Notice their posture, gestures Do not copy!!!!! Mirror what they do – if they are sitting forward in a chair you do the same, try to match the tone of their voice (unless they are angry!!) Matching body posture, gesture and tone and speed of voice when disagreeing or challenging will maintain rapport Clients often comment on feeling heard and respected

Successful Assessments Imagine being that person ~ this does not compromise your beliefs and values but helps to understand their world Be open to seeing things from their perspective Use your natural skills and abilities Giving challenging feedback is entirely possible with-out conflict

Rapport Rapport is a relationship of trust and mutual influence At the heart of managing people well People are the key assets of an organisation or relationship Agreement does not guarantee rapport Having Rapport builds good relationships

Perceptual Positions There are three in NLP First Position ~ yours Second Position ~ other persons Third Position ~ both

Perceptual Positions The art of seeing events through the eyes of others ‘the way I see it’ ‘If I were you I would’ ‘taking into account both views it seems like this'