Murmuring 101

A Magic Key…

DES MOINES, Iowa Jane Hambleton has dubbed herself the "meanest mom on the planet." After finding alcohol in her son's car, she decided to sell the car and share her 19- year-old's misdeed with everyone — by placing an ad in the local newspaper. The ad reads: "OLDS 1999 Intrigue. Totally uncool parents who obviously don't love teenage son, selling his car. Only driven for three weeks before snoopy mom who needs to get a life found booze under front seat. $3,700/offer. Call meanest mom on the planet." The 48-year-old from Fort Dodge says she has fielded more than 70 telephone calls from emergency room technicians, nurses, school counselors and even a Georgia man who wanted to congratulate her. "The ad cost a fortune, but you know what? I'm telling people what happened here," Hambleton says. "I'm not just gonna put the car for resale when there's nothing wrong with it, except the driver made a dumb decision. "It's overwhelming the number of calls I've gotten from people saying 'Thank you, it's nice to see a responsible parent.' So far there are no calls from anyone saying, 'You're really strict. You're real overboard, lady."' The only critic is her son, who Hambleton says is "very, very unhappy" with the ad and claims the alcohol was left by a passenger. Hambleton believes her son but has decided mercy isn't the best policy in this case. She says she set two rules when she bought the car at Thanksgiving: No booze, and always keep it locked. The car has been sold, but Hambleton says she will continue the ad for another week — just for the feedback.

Testimony Meeting… I’m grateful for all my many blessings, I’m grateful for to be married to a priesthood holder who fulfills all his callings. I’m grateful all my sons went on missions and are now all married in the temple. I’m grateful I had parents who never yelled. Lastly, I’m grateful to be a member of the only true church on the face of the earth. Great! And if these are not true, do we still have a right to be grateful? Are we somehow “less blessed”?

Blessings BlessingsTrials

How do you see things? Nephi And so great were the blessings of the Lord upon us, that while we did live upon raw meat in the wilderness, our women did give plenty of suck for their children, and were strong, yea, even like unto the men; and they began to bear their journeyings without murmurings. And thus we see that the commandments of God must be fulfilled. And if it so be that the children of men keep the commandments of God he doth nourish them, and strengthen them, and provide means whereby they can accomplish the thing which he has commanded them; Laman and Lemuel …and we have wandered in the wilderness for these many years; and our women have toiled, being big with child; and they have borne children in the wilderness and suffered all things, save it were death; and it would have been better that they had died before they came out of Jerusalem than to have suffered these afflictions. Behold, these many years we have suffered in the wilderness, which time we might have enjoyed our possessions and the land of our inheritance; yea, and we might have been happy.

Neal Maxwell First, the murmurer often lacks the courage to express openly his concerns… Second, murmurers make good conversational cloak holders. Though picking up no stones themselves, they provoke others to do so. Third, while a murmurer insists on venting his own feelings, he regards any response thereto as hostile. Furthermore, murmurers seldom take into account the bearing capacity of their audiences. Fourth, murmurers have short memories. Strange, isn’t it, brothers and sisters, how those with the shortest memories have the longest lists of demands! However, with no remembrance of past blessings, there is no perspective about what is really going on. “‘Murmur Not’,” Ensign, Nov 1989, 82

1 Nephi 17 And it came to pass that after I, Nephi, had been in the land of Bountiful for the space of many days, the voice of the Lord came unto me, saying: Arise, and get thee into the mountain. And it came to pass that I arose and went up into the mountain, and cried unto the Lord. And it came to pass that the Lord spake unto me, saying: Thou shalt construct a ship, after the manner which I shall show thee, that I may carry thy people across these waters. And I said: Lord, whither shall I go that I may find ore to molten, that I may make tools to construct the ship… Wadi Sayq

Thomas B. Marsh “I became jealous of the Prophet … and overlooked everything that was right, and spent all my time in looking for the evil; … I thought I saw a beam in Brother Joseph’s eye, but it was nothing but a mote, and my own eye was filled with the beam; … I got mad and I wanted everybody else to be mad. I talked with Brother Brigham Young and Brother Heber C. Kimball, and I wanted them to be mad like myself; and I saw they were not mad, and I got madder still because they were not. Brother Brigham Young, with a cautious look, said, ‘Are you the leader of the Church, Brother Thomas?’ I answered ‘No.’ ‘Well then,’ said he, ‘why do you not let that alone?’ Testimonies of the Divinity of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints by Its Leaders, comp. Joseph E. Cardon and Samuel O. Bennion, Independence, Mo.: Zion’s Printing and Publishing Co., 1930, pp. 103, 105.

A cure for murmuring- Unrealistic Expectations About a year and a half ago I developed a severe case of respiratory flu. After six weeks had passed I was still weak, had developed a chronic cough, and continued to feel awful. Ruefully realizing that the doctor who treats himself has a fool for a patient, I finally gave up and made an appointment with a colleague. "I can't afford to feel like this. I've got too much to do," I complained. Muttering, he punctuated his thorough physical examination with some rather pointed questions. "How many Church jobs do you hold?" "How many scientific papers did you write this last year?" "How many hours sleep do you get a night?" "How many miles a day did you say you run?" "Did you have a garden again this year and put up all your own produce?" When he'd finally finished he put his hands on his hips, looked me sternly in the eye, and demanded, "Just exactly who or what do you think you are? Wonder Woman? You're expecting a thirty-five-year-old woman's body to perform as it did when you were twenty-one. In fact, you're copping out. You're avoiding making decisions by trying to do everything. Grow up. You don't need a doctor; you need a good verbal spanking!" Sheepishly I acknowledged he was absolutely right. And I have subsequently tried to temper my choices, realizing that my strength and energy are limited. I still try to do too much, but at least I'm gradually getting a little better at choosing among equally worthy activities. Balance: the Joy of Perspective," in LDS Women's Treasury: Insights and Inspiration for Today's Woman, 112.