Anger

Anger is: A natural emotion which evokes high intensity, high emotions, which is generally short-lived. Generally unavoidable unless we deny it. Taught to be handled differently in families.

Anger Stimuli Being misunderstood Being ignored Being unappreciated Being belittled Being taken for granted Experiencing abuse Being unjustly challenged

Anger Stimuli continued Misunderstanding rules Living with increased noise levels Hunger Sleep deprivation Malnourished Stress Pattern of behavior

Three Step Anger Development Process The child is attacked, criticized, or yelled at by an exasperated parent, brother or sister; The child responds aggressively. The child's aggression is rewarded when the attacker withdraws and the child learns to use tactics such as whining, yelling and temper tantrums.

Strategies to help the child deal with anger

1.Learn to deal with your own and others' anger As caregivers we must be able to deal with our own anger and then we can help the children. We need to model anger management.

2. Distract or redirect the child This works with younger children, but we need to be sure that we are not denying the child the emotion, nor escalating the emotion, or excusing the behavior.

3. Be prompt and brief with discipline. Don’t give the child empty threats, follow through with what the consequence will be and don’t lecture. Let the consequence have its full effect.

4. Try to discover the reason for your child's anger or temper tantrum. What is going on? Remember Adler’s 4 reasons for misbehavior in children. Also look at health of child, nutrition, sleep, stress, family issues

5. Avoid shaming your child about being angry. Research states that shaming a child’s anger can negatively affect the child’s willingness to relieve distress in others. Very interesting cause and effect, what have the parents learned through their early childhood years.

6. Teach children about intensity levels of anger. Begin describing words to define the varying degrees of anger. Be sure the child knows what behaviors are unacceptable, but that the emotions are OK.

7. Set clear limits and high expectations Keep in mind the child’s age, abilities, and temperament.

8. Notice, compliment and reward appropriate behavior. Remember discussion on praise needing to be specific, immediate, personal and sincere.

9. Maintain open communication. Keep the door always open to communicate, be open and listen to the child, not for excuses.

10. Teach understanding and empathy.. View and discuss each child’s view points and encourage empathy. Discuss the effects of his or her actions on others