Family Community and Empowerment Program Created by Gale Cannon - CFLE Navigating the Teen Years Office of National Drug Control Policy . National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign A parent’s handbook for raising healthy teens Parents: The Anti-Drug Presented by Northwest Suburban Integration School District #6078 Family Community and Empowerment Program Created by Gale Cannon - CFLE

Principle 1: Tune into your Teen Close relationship with parents- A common thread among teens that stay healthy and drug-free. Ways to foster a closer relationship: Spend regular time together. Talk openly and honestly. Use positive communication skills. Acknowledge positive qualities and behavior. Addendum by NWSISD- Foster the school/home connection

Tuning into your Teen: A self-check Do you praise your teen for accomplishments? Do you spend time each day talking with your teenager? Do you have regular meal time with your teen and other family members? Do you know your teens friends? NWSISD addendum – Talk to your teen about bullying and being bullied..

Principle 2: Guide your Teen Setting rules and expectations: Step 1- Communicate clearly your expectations in a firm but persuasive manner. Step 2- Discuss risk-taking behavior to your teenager and share the importance of being accountable for his/her behavior. [ cyber rules ] Step 3- Identify the rules of your household and be specific as regards to substance abuse and other risk-taking behaviors. Step 4- Consequences should be practical, supportive and able to teach and it’s very important to be consistent. Step 5- Don’t neglect to reward and praise your teen for making right choices.

Setting rules and expectations for your Teen: A quick check list Have you told your teens you expect them to avoid alcohol, tobacco, marijuana and other illicit drugs? Have you discussed and set “house rules” with your teen? Have you defined specific consequences for breaking rules? Did you involve your teen in the rule-setting discussion?

Monitoring your Teens Monitoring is keeping tabs on your teenagers. It is a parents responsibility to know where there children are and whom they are with and what they are doing. Teenagers are very active and spend several hours away from the home take the time to be informed, confirm that your child is where they are suppose. Check in with parents, neighbors, friends, teachers, coaches and others in your child’s life to help keep tabs. Monitor your child’s physical and mental health, look for any signs of problems. Engage with your teen when they come home at night, be vigilant about what’s in your medicine cabinet, be aware of any signs (odors on clothing) be in tune to what messages are being sent via the media on drug use and monitor your child’s online activity.

Monitoring your Teen: Quick self check Do you follow up on your teens to confirm his or her whereabouts? Do you know where your teen is after school and who he or she spends time with? Do you know the parents of your teen’s friends and do they know and respect your family’s rules? Do you have rules about where you teen can spend time?

Principle 3: Respect your Teen Teens want respect and want opportunities to assert their own identities and make their own decisions. Suggestions on building respect with your teen. Stay involved but give your teen privacy. Encourage your teen to express their own opinions and ideas. Make time to listen and be responsive to their concerns. When offering criticism or discipline focus on behavior not on the teen. Don’t belittle your teen’s way of dressing or appearance. Appreciate and acknowledge your teen’s uniqueness, skills and strengths.

Respecting your Teen: A quick check list Do you ask about and respect your teen’s worries and concerns? When you disagree with your teen, do you take the time to listen? Are you respectful of your teen’s friends and taste in music or clothes? Do you take care to treat each of your children as distinct individuals?

Principal 4: Be a good role model Parents and care-givers have a responsibility to set good examples for their children. Setting a good example is especially important when it comes to substance use. Don’t smoke. If you smoke, quit for your own health as well as for the health of your family. Don’t allow your teen to drink or smoke in your home. Don’t provide alcohol to teenagers in your home. Don’t involve your teen in your use such as asking him or her to get you a beer or a cigarette. Never drink and drive. Enlist other family members or friends to serve as positive role models for your teen.

Being a good role model: Quick check list Have family gatherings that don’t include alcohol. It’s important to show your teens that you can have fun without drinking alcohol. Share “funny” stories about your past substance abuse in front of your kids. Get help if you think you have problems with substance, alcohol or illicit drug use.

Busy parent’s daily check list Know your teen’s plans for the day. Know where your teens are when your are at work or not otherwise with them. Remind your teen about relevant rules. Praise and thank your teen for good behavior. Check homework and other responsibilities that need to be completed. Try having regular family meal time and family activities.

Busy parent’s weekly checklist Take some time to check in with each child. Ask your teen mid- week about plans for the weekend. Do this early to avoid last-minute conflict. Check that your teen is where they say they will be. Encourage your teen to have friends over. Remind your teen about weekly rules and weekend rules.

Busy parent’s monthly checklist Have a couple of activities with your teens Check the temperature of your relationship. Check with your teen on their current interest and discuss; asking if they need help. Make sure you’ve followed through on promises Get a report from teachers, coaches and guidance counselors. Take a monitoring inventory.. What have your teens been spending money on. Check in with your teens about rules and discuss meaningful ways to reward.

Final note to parents Most teens do well and have healthy relationships with their parents. Remember that you are an influencer in your child’s life. Your parenting style might be strict, lenient or somewhere in-between, but whatever the case, the research shows that parents and families are a teen’s best bet.