 Who do you have the hardest time getting along with? Why do you think you have such a hard time getting along with that person?

 What do you think you could do to improve communication with the person you struggle to get along with?

 CHILD- Easiest & Most natural to use- very immature and the least effective. Ex) “I want, You’re so dumb, etc” › Whining, Yelling, Not Listening, Ordering  PARENT-This style has NOTHING to do with age or being a father/mother. Directs behaviors- gets someone to comply and gets the point across. Ex) Giving instructions, demanding, punishing, “Lend me a dollar. Mom, get me a cookie!”  ADULT-Highest level and most desirable/effective. Open, two-way communication, trusting others, respecting opinions, controlling emotions. Ex) Think of one you have had

 Definition: Those used to communicate with oneself  Examples: self-control, self-discipline, accepting responsibilities, self-talk

INTERPERSONAL SKILLS: OTHERS

 Definition: Those used to communicate with others  Examples: listening, talking, problem- solving, understanding

 They help us to understand our own behavior  They help us to cope with circumstances of life  They help us to control situations we find ourselves in

 Write a comic (next to the one from yesterday) using the same characters. This set must also show at least 3 scenes and needs to be about one of the 3 communication styles (child, parent, adult)

 Passive:  Characteristics: Blushes when someone looks his/her way. Agrees with EVERYONE. “Yes, you’re right” “I agree.”  Buys from every door-to-door salesman  Uses phrases like “They say”  Takes blame  Makes others feel guilty by letting others walk all over them  Often apologizes in a conversation

 Tells others what he/she wants and then talks them into it  Gets angry when someone disagrees  Rams opinions down people’s throats  Demands for explanations  Very critical  Must be in charge  Gets even with sarcasm  Listens by interrupting

 Buys only what they need  States opinion matter of factly  Negotiates and compromises  Smiles frequently  Takes credit when it’s due  Can admit he/she is wrong  Cooperates well with others  Listens when others speak

 Of the three types, which is the most successful?  What type of person would you want to communicate with?  What kind of communicator are you?

Communication Techniques

 Constructive  Destructive  Non-verbal

 This contributes to a meaningful exchange of ideas and/or leads to understanding.

-Giving positive or encouraging messages -Asking questions -Sending clear, concise messages -Being honest and open -Keeping the confidences of other people -Speaking with respect -Using tact- (communicating something sensitive without hurting or offending) -Being a good listener

This is talk that “hurts.” Some messages discourage rather than encourage helpful or constructive communication.

- Insults, harassing, teasing -Gossip, lies, blaming and accusing -“You” messages -Sexual Harassment -Threatening -Sarcasm- (when a person says one message, but nonverbal expressions and the tone of voice send another message) -Interrupting or dominating the conversation -Swearing

 Use “I” messages! - I feel ~ makes you responsible for the statement - When ~ Describes the situation - Because ~ tells why you feel the way you do (This really works!! You should try it!)

 Be clear - Say what you mean and mean what you say!

 Ask questions - If you are not clear on what someone is saying….ASK QUESTIONS!! - Restate what someone has said to make sure that you really did understand what they said. “S0 you are feeling sad because…”

 Be a good listener - Studies indicate that 60 percent of the time that you communicate is spent listening! If you are a poor listener you are a poor communicator.

 Nonverbal communication is the way a person expresses him/herself through movement, posture, and facial expression. It is possible to send one type of verbal message and at the same time, a different type with body language. Nonverbal communication is VERY powerful and can often be misinterpreted.

What are some examples of non- verbal communication?

 How can you let people know you are listening?

 Are you listening?