How to Make Haiku in English By Howard Doyle (Dept. International Studies / 国際コミュニケーション学科 Kochi University / 高知大學 in connection with Kochi University English & Japanese Haiku Translation Competition

It is easy! A Haiku is a very short poem which people first wrote in Japanese. Now people write Haiku in other languages too.

Like this: (Photoby Howard Doyle, Exhibit of students Haiku from 英語テクスト構成研究中級 Course June2008)

Counting Syllables in Haiku Normally Haiku have 17 syllables -often as: 5 syllables + 5 syllables + 7 syllables

Do you know what syllables are? Syllables are the different parts of a word that you say. For example, ‘syllables’–>syl – la - bles this word has 3 syllables. OR this word in Japanese: お好み焼き おこのみやき -> o-ko-no-mi-ya-ki6 syllables!

But be careful ! – the way to see syllables in Japanese is different to how to see syllables in English. This is because spelling in English and also pronouncing words in English are done in different ways. Like this word: ‘vegetables’.vege – ta – bles (sounds like ‘veg – ta – bulls’) 3 syllables! Or this word: ‘strawberries’can bestraw – berries (sounds like ‘straw – bries’)2 syllables ORstraw – ber – ries (sounds like ‘straw – be – ries’)3 syllables

First, let’s try to make a Haiku in Japanese Actually you can make haiku in Japanese in a really similar way to making haiku in English. For example, you can start by thinking something like this: I smell smoke. What smoke is it? What is it coming from? Oh! it is fish. Fish cooking! Special Japanese style cooked saury (or ‘sanma’ – 秋刀魚 ). Also it is autumn now. Hmm! – people often cook sanma in autumn. Hmm! – so, if I can smell smoke from cooking sanma, it must be autumn. So, hmm! – autumn = smoky sanma. Hmm! – and therefore, smoky sanma equals autumn!! Interesting!! [ ア！けむりの におい だ！ 何の けむり かな？！ア！魚の けむり だ！ やいてる さ かな！ 秋刀魚 だ！そう だな！やはり 秋ですね！ Hmmm! やぱり 秋刀魚が 焼いて、 そして けむりの においも あれば、 秋の きせつと 分かる。 だから、 秋＝焼いて る秋刀魚のけむり … Hmmm! だから 秋刀魚の けむり = 秋 ！！ Ｈｍｍｍ！！！ おもしろい！！ …]

So, now I can think of how to start the haiku: smelling smoke and I don’t know what it is. あっ！ けむり だ！ なん の けむり か な？ Then: I remember it is the smoke from sanma cooking あっ！ さんま が やいてる！ Then: I remember it that people often cook sanma in autumn そう だ な！ さんま は あき に です ね！ Then: I know it must be autumn now. だ から やぱり いま は あき だ な！ Then I start to put these different thoughts together, something like this: Oh! Smoke! What kind of smoke is that? あっ！なん の けむり か な？ Then: Sanma is cooking! さんま が やいてる！ Then: Therefore it’s autumn さんま は あき に。

… and another idea: Sanma is autumn fish, so therefore I should know it is autumn, because autumn ‘is’ smoke from cooking sanma [ さんま は あき の さかな、 から あき の きせつ と わかって しまう、 なせな ら あき の は やき さんま の けむり か な！？ ]

So, then I can start cutting and changing different bits – words, grammar, the word order, etc. But I also need 17 syllables – maybe 5 – 5 – 7, but just now anything is OK. Also, if you like you can change some bits from kana to kanji, or from kanji to kana Then in the end, I make something like this: 何の 煙か？ 秋の焼き 秋刀魚だな！ な - ん - の - け - む - り - か？あ - き - の や - きさ - ん - ま だ な！ [7 syllables+5 syllables+5 syllables =17 syllables] *This haiku is not the traditional 5 – 5 – 7 syllable haiku pattern. It is a 7 – 5 – 5 syllable pattern. This is OK – of course it is still a haiku with 17 syllables.

Second, let’s try to make a haiku in English. There are 2 ways to make a haiku in English: 1.make the haiku in English from the start; & 2.make the haiku in Japanese and then translate it into English. Let’s look at both of these ways. Then you can practice a little bit and see which way you like to make haiku in English.

i.Let’s try to make a Haiku in English from the Start (what you are going to write about): 1. think about: somebody or something (ie - a person, - an animal, - a season, - a particular place, - a time, - a condition, or - a feeling Eg. A party With friends from my old school Feeling happy In a restaurant

2. think about when or where (ie any time or place) any special time or place Eg A party In a restaurant

3.think about what is happening (ie any event, or a change): is anything happening, or has anything happened, or will something happen; or is there a change, or is something changing now, or has something changed or did something change before, or will something change in the future Eg. A party with old friends Talking together I am feeling nostalgic

So, I can get this set of points: A party – in a restaurant – with old school friends – talking together – I feel nostalgic But, if I just use this, there are 21 syllables, which is too many syllables A party – in a restaurant – with old school friends – talking together – I feel nostalgic A – par-ty – in – a – res-tau-rant - with old school friends – talking together – I feel nostalgic But, if I just use this, there are 21 syllables, which is too many syllables A party – in a restaurant – with old school friends – talking together – I feel nostalgic A – par-ty – in – a – res-tau-rant – with – old – school – friends – tal-king – to-ge-ther 7 syllables9 syllables – I – feel – nos-tal-gic 5 syllables 7 syllables

So, then I can start cutting and changing different bits – words, grammar, the word order, etc But I also need 17 syllables – maybe 5 – 5 – 7, but just now anything is OK – even 5 – 7 – 5!! Then in the end, I make something like this: In a restaurant talking with my old school friends. It has been a long time. In - a – res-tau-rant - tal-king - with - my - old - school - friends - It’s - been - a - long - time! [ 5 syllables + 7 syllables+ 5 syllables= 17 syllables ] [Question for you: To change the haiku from 21 to 17 syllables, WHAT HAVE I CHANGED?] *(By the way, if you make a haiku like this you can enter the competition)

ii.Let’s try to translate a Haiku from Japanese to English First, take your Haiku and make a literal translation. This means translate every word in order. [ Of course the English will be strange, but you fix the English grammar and idiom and vocabulary later.] な - ん - の - け - む - り - か？あ - き - の や - き - さ - ん - ま だ な！ なん の けむり か？あき の やき さんま だ な！ What (of) smoke (is that)?Autumn (of) barbeque(ed) saury(fish) (is) (n’t it)! What smoke is that?Barbequed saury, isn’t it?

Second, fix the grammar and idiom and vocabulary. Maybe you need to do this a couple of times, because sometimes there is more than one way to say something in English. Also, of course, maybe your Haiku in English will not be 100% the same as it is in Japanese – don’t worry, because this is normal. But please try to translate as closely as possible. What – smoke – is – that? - Bar-be-qued – sau-ry - is-n’t – it! [TOO SHORT] What – smoke - is - that? - It’s - the – bar-be-qued – sau-ry – of – au-tumn, - is-n’t – it! [17 SYLLABLES, BUT NOT QUITE RIGHT] What’s – that – smoke? - San-ma – ya-ki! - The – smo-king – fish – of –au-tumn [TOO SHORT! BUT MANY PEOPLE KNOW ‘SANMA’ IS A FISH & ‘YAKI’ IS ‘BARBEQUED’ – OK!]

Third, change the translation to fit 17 syllables. If necessary, you can have 16 syllables or 18 syllables (because sometimes different people say different English words in different ways). Maybe you need to cut some bits from your translation, or change some bits, or add some bits – don’t worry, because this is normal. But please try to keep it as similar to the original Japanese as possible. Oh! – What’s – that – smoke? - Ahh! – It’s – san-ma – ya-ki, - the – smo-king - fish - of - au-tumn. [CHANGED A LOT, BUT EXACTLY 17 SYLLABLES. THIS SEEMS MUCH BETTER!!] Oh! What’s that smoke? Ahh! It’s sanma yaki, the smoky fish of autumn

Another question for you: Please look at the original Japanese haiku - 何の 煙か？ 秋の焼き 秋刀魚だな！ and the final English translation haiku - Oh! What’s that smoke? Ahh! It’s sanma yaki, the smoky fish of autumn What has changed? (Advice: of course the language has changed!! But what else??!) Try to make a list! … and good luck making interesting haiku in English