Understanding Grief and Loss The Path to Recovery

“Grief is the binding alloy and the armor of the heart. Like a fire touched, the mind recoils at losing what it holds most dear.”

Losses Loss of health Loss of health Loss of trust Loss of trust Loss of future Loss of future Loss of routine Loss of routine Loss of financial security Loss of financial security Loss of social support Loss of social support Loss of identity Loss of identity Loss of hope Loss of hope

Common Characteristics of Grief  Feelings  Sense of unreality, irritability, self reproach, anxiety, fear, helplessness, depression, intensity of all feelings  Physical Sensations  Fatigue, numbness, headaches, stomach and intestinal problems, oversensitivity to noise

Characteristics of Grief (cont.)  Thought patterns  Sense of unreality, lack of ability to concentrate, feeling the presence of the deceased, problems with decision making  Behaviors  Appetite and sleep disturbances, social withdrawal, searching for the deceased, loss of libido, absent minded behavior

Characteristics of Grief (cont.)  Social changes  Increase or decrease in desire for support of friends and family, dependency on others, marital difficulties, role changes, need for rituals

The Grief Cycle Shock & Denial Anger & Guilt Bargaining Depression & Despair Acceptance LOSS RECOVERY

Shock and Denial “Is this really happening?”

Anger and Guilt Self Self Spouse Spouse Friends/Family Friends/Family Industry Industry Health care system Health care system Media Media Attorneys Attorneys

Bargaining “Let’s make a deal”

Depression and Despair Helplessness Helplessness Change in sleep patterns Change in sleep patterns Increase or Decrease in eating patterns Increase or Decrease in eating patterns Inability to be productive Inability to be productive Loneliness/Alienation Loneliness/Alienation Physical symptoms Physical symptoms

Acceptance Adjusting to the reality of the loss…… “Good days outnumber your bad days”

Helping Yourself Through Grief Be gentle with yourself Be gentle with yourself Accept your feelings Accept your feelings Identify your support system Identify your support system Share your grief Share your grief Be attentive to physical needs Be attentive to physical needs Be attentive to emotional needs Be attentive to emotional needs Prepare for special days Prepare for special days

“Through the willingness to stretch, we come to see ourselves not as helpless victims, but rather as those who are indeed strong in the very midst of brokenness.” Ernest Hemingway