SAFE DATES SESSION 7 EQUAL POWER THROUGH COMMUNICATION

CLASSROOM RULES 1.Respect each others opinions 2.Listen to each other ( No talking while someone else is speaking) 3.No Names 4.1 person is talking at time 5.No Laughing

LEARNER OUTCOMES -Describe the 8 communication skills for resolving conflict -Demonstrate the use of the 8 Safe Dates communication skills -Describe some nonviolent responses when a bf/gf doesn’t communicate in a way that is fair and equal

EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION Effective communication is important in all parts of lives In relationships, open and honest communication is essential Positive communication skills can help you work through the situation without being hurtful or abusive

8 SKILLS OF EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION S ecure your center A sk clarifying questions F ind out what your partner’s feelings are E xpress your Feelings D etermine what’s important to you A cknowledge what’s important to your partner T hink about your similarities and differences E xchange ideas for a possible solution

8 SKILLS OF EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION What do you think each skill means? These communication skills are useful in establishing new relationships or in ongoing, healthy relationships where both people feel secure. In in a relationship where power isn’t shared equally these skills may not be useful on their own

IDENTIFYING COMMUNICATION SKILLS Role-play LaToya and Marcus ( 2 volunteers) Instructions: - As the role-play is acted out, listen for each of the Safe Dates skills of communication - Now complete Handout 19b LaToya and Marcus Checklist

ROLE-PLAYING COMMUNICATION SKILLS Communication is a skill No one is a born communicator, but everyone can learn to assert himself or herself while respecting the feelings and beliefs of others Scenario 1: Maggie & Josh Scenario 2: Serena & Tonya Scenario 3: Jammal & Jennifer

WHAT IF DOESN’T WORK For communication skills to work and to produce a result that both people are happy with, both people have to cooperate. What can you do if your bf/gf is doing their part? Scenario 1: Chang & Lucy What can Lucy do if Chang is clearly not going to cooperate? Scenario 2: Tyler and Rachel What can Tyler do since he can’t seem to calm Rachel down?

CONCLUSION Good Communication between dating partner’s can help keep the power in relationships equal and can prevent abuse from happening. In relationships that are already abusive, communication skills may not be enough When victims of abuse try and use these skills, their efforts may be blocked because the abuser doesn’t want to relinquish any power

STEREOTYPING LEADS TO ABUSE Scenario 1: Jason and Megan 1.What stereotypes does Jason hold of females? 2.What stereotypes does Jason hold of males? 3.Did Megan hold any stereotypes? 4.Did Jason’s friends hold any stereotypes?

STEREOTYPING LEADS TO ABUSE ( CONTINUED) Scenario 2: Tyrone and Nicole 1.What stereotypes does Nicole hold of males? 2.What stereotypes does Nicole hold on females? 3.Did Tyrone hold any stereotypes?

CONCLUSION -Television, movies, songs, parents, and friends reflect how people are “ supposed” to act in our society -Stereotypes can be both positive and negative -Trying to live up to certain stereotypes or expecting a partner to live up to certain stereotypes may cause conflicts -When in a relationship, think about your expectations for your bf/gf. Are they fair and reasonable, or are your expectations based on gender stereotypes?