Bullying: On and offline

The facts

How common is it? Nearly half of children and young people say they’ve been bullied. Nearly half of children and young people say they’ve been bullied. Almost 40% report experiencing cyberbullying. Almost 40% report experiencing cyberbullying. 15% of eight to 17 year olds say they’ve bullied someone online. 15% of eight to 17 year olds say they’ve bullied someone online.

What is it? Usually defined as repeated behaviour meant to hurt someone else (physically or emotionally). Usually defined as repeated behaviour meant to hurt someone else (physically or emotionally). Could include: Could include: Assault or violence. Assault or violence. Teasing, cruel jokes, name calling. Teasing, cruel jokes, name calling. Threats. Threats. Sharing unpleasant photos or comments about someone online. Sharing unpleasant photos or comments about someone online.

Who’s involved? Anyone can be bullied, but it’s more likely if they’re seen as different in some way. Especially common in certain groups: Over half of young LGBT people say they’ve been bullied at school. More than 1400 calls to Childline about racist bullying in Primary school pupils with SEN are twice as likely to be persistently bullied. Among young people who bullied someone online: 59% did it to fit in socially. 43% did it to keep from being targeted themselves. 25% did it in response to peer pressure. 12% did it because they were unhappy. Anyone can be bullied, but it’s more likely if they’re seen as different in some way. Especially common in certain groups: Over half of young LGBT people say they’ve been bullied at school. More than 1400 calls to Childline about racist bullying in Primary school pupils with SEN are twice as likely to be persistently bullied. Among young people who bullied someone online: 59% did it to fit in socially. 43% did it to keep from being targeted themselves. 25% did it in response to peer pressure. 12% did it because they were unhappy.

Is online bullying different? Harder to escape – mobile devices and plugged-in lives give bullies access to their victims 24/7. Harder to escape – mobile devices and plugged-in lives give bullies access to their victims 24/7. Could also involve more people – jokes at someone else’s expense have the potential to go viral. Could also involve more people – jokes at someone else’s expense have the potential to go viral. There’s often a permanent record of the bullying – could be upsetting even after it’s ended. There’s often a permanent record of the bullying – could be upsetting even after it’s ended. Can also make it easier to get help. Can also make it easier to get help.

Supporting your child

Practical steps Find out what exactly has been happening. Find out what exactly has been happening. Keep a record of all incidents and when they occurred. Keep a record of all incidents and when they occurred. Take screenshots of any messages before deleting them. Take screenshots of any messages before deleting them. Block and report anyone who’s been bullying your child online. Block and report anyone who’s been bullying your child online. Change any passwords that might have been compromised by online bullying and check privacy settings. Change any passwords that might have been compromised by online bullying and check privacy settings. Don’t confiscate your child’s device or stop them spending time online. Don’t confiscate your child’s device or stop them spending time online. Make a plan for where your child can go to escape bullying at school. Make a plan for where your child can go to escape bullying at school. Make sure your child’s school is aware – even if it’s been happening outside school. Make sure your child’s school is aware – even if it’s been happening outside school.

Emotional support Thank your child for telling you – it’s not easy to open up. Thank your child for telling you – it’s not easy to open up. Listen to what they say and follow their lead on how to handle it. Listen to what they say and follow their lead on how to handle it. Encourage them not to retaliate (this can make things worse) and discuss more productive ways to respond. Encourage them not to retaliate (this can make things worse) and discuss more productive ways to respond. Think of ways to help your child with their self-confidence. Think of ways to help your child with their self-confidence. Try to stay positive. Try to stay positive.

If your child is the bully Figure out what’s really happening. Figure out what’s really happening. Cooperate and accept the consequences. Cooperate and accept the consequences. Don’t panic or blame yourself – but think about the examples they see. Don’t panic or blame yourself – but think about the examples they see. Find out (and deal with) the reasons. Find out (and deal with) the reasons. Make sure they know it’s not OK – and work on empathy. Make sure they know it’s not OK – and work on empathy. Remember your child’s other qualities. Remember your child’s other qualities.

More resources Parentinfo.org – information for parents and schools on a range of topics including bullying. – the Diana Award’s anti-bullying campaign. Stonewall – LGBT rights organisation that also works against anti- LGBT bullying. – coalition of organisations working against bullying. Parentinfo.org – information for parents and schools on a range of topics including bullying. – the Diana Award’s anti-bullying campaign. Stonewall – LGBT rights organisation that also works against anti- LGBT bullying. – coalition of organisations working against bullying.