By: Maria Velez CHD 205 Guiding the Behavior of Children Professor: Rachel Sweeney Assignment # 5 11/19/12

How many of you know a boy or girl here at school who gets picked on and left out and never included and laughed at all the time? School can be a mean and dangerous place

“A whole new vision of education that says that educating the heart is as important as educating the mind” (Linda Lantieri)

The term emotional intelligence refers to: the ability to: recognize understand, handle and appropriately express our emotions. Also known as emotional literacy, it involves: How we feel How we think How we behave

Emotional Literacy is a term that was used first by Claude Steiner (1997) who says:Claude Steiner Emotional Literacy is made up of ‘the ability: 1.To understand your emotions, 2.To listen to others and empathize with their emotions 3.To express emotions productively. To be emotionally literate is to be able to handle emotions in a way that improves your personal power and improves the quality of life around you. Emotional literacy improves relationships, creates loving possibilities between people, makes co-operative work possible, and facilitates the feeling of community

Over the last twenty years, a series of studies has clearly demonstrated that children’s emotional and social skills are linked to their early academic standing Children who are disliked by teachers and peers grow to like school less, feeling less love for learning and avoid school more often.

The baby whose distress is responded to lovingly and promptly will learn confidence. A child who understands the important role of emotions will have a better foundation for a joyful, fulfilled and integrated life. Adults living in healthy relationships will serve as positive role models for their children. Older people who have learned to practice emotional literacy can complete their days with peace of mind.

How Emotional Literacy can be enhanced by teachers? (By Leah Davies, M.Ed.) 1.Helping children to understand about feelings through books, puppets, interactive storytelling or role-plays. 2.Teach children to identify the emotional signals from other children and adults. 3.Observing child's facial expressions, posture, play or art work for signs that a child is experiencing a strong negative emotion. Then offering a dialogue to talk about their feelings’ and letting him know we understand it. 4.When a child hits, the feeling of anger is demonstrated. Stop the child and say, "It's okay to feel angry; it's not okay to hurt others. Talk to me about what your feeling.” 5.Communicate understanding and empathy by reflecting the observed emotion. For example, say, "You seem sad" or "You seem upset." Then, if the child confirms your reflection and begins talking, be quiet and listen. 6.Observe the child's nonverbal behavior for clues as to how he or she is feeling. Listen for the content of what is being said, as well. 7.Avoid negative statements like, "What's your problem?" These comments discourage open communication and suggest that when a child does not behave perfectly, he or she is "bad.” 8.Avoid moralizing ("That was wrong of you!"); humiliating ("I can't believe you did that."); lecturing ("You should have known better."); denying ("You'll be okay."); pitying, ("Poor you. It's all their fault."); and rescuing, ("I'll take care of it."). Instead, listen patiently and nod your head appropriately. Remember that questions can often lead the child away from the real problem or cause the child to stop talking. 9.Problem solve with the child by encouraging him or her to think of options and decide what constructive action to take. 10.Keep lines of communication open. You might say something like: "Emily, I am glad you told me about your mom's illness. It must be hard to have her in the hospital. Please know that I care about you and that I am here if you want to talk again."

Ten Ways to Foster Resiliency in Children (By Leah Davies, M.Ed.) Resilient children are those who adapt well, despite experiencing adversity in their lives. Families, schools, and communities have a profound influence upon children's ability to be persistent, overcome obstacles, and develop hope for their future. When children are influenced by caring adults with high expectations for their success, they are more likely to withstand negative pressures and become responsible adults. What Can School Professionals Do To Enhance Resiliency In Children? 1.Respect and Demonstrate Kindness Toward All Children Kids should be greeted by name as often as possible, especially at the beginning of each school day. Staff members need to be encouraged to display interest in students through thoughtful words and a pleasant demeanor. 2.Promote a Sense of Belonging and Ownership in the School Children can participate in their school by helping in the classrooms, doing errands for their teacher, working as crossing guards, being peer mediators, picking up trash, tutoring younger or special needs children, or contributing in other areas. After-school involvement in arts and crafts, drama, sports teams, clubs and activities can also increase school bonding. 3.Recognize and Believe in Each Child's Worth Challenge students to do their best and express confidence in their ability to do many things well. Make expectations clear and encourage perseverance and critical thinking. When children express original thoughts or unique points of view, acknowledge their ideas. 4.Accentuate Cooperation Rather Than Competition Structure environments so that children feel safe, secure, and ready to learn. Acknowledge individual improvement, rather than emphasize who is smartest, fastest, or most talented. Give recognition freely and compliment individual and team effort. 5.Teach Social Interaction Skills Empathy, communication, and responsiveness need to be modeled and stressed. Be aware of and prevent teasing, gossiping, excluding, or other bullying behaviors. Have the students role play friendship and assertiveness skills; be careful to choose children who will model the behaviors you want to reinforce.

Ten Ways to Foster Resiliency in Children (By Leah Davies, M.Ed.) 6.Teach Problem-Solving Skills To foster self-awareness and self-control have the children practice using the following steps from the Kelly Bear C.A.R.E.S. Program: Ask, "What is the problem?” Ask, "What can I do?” Make a list of ideas. Decide which one to try. Try it. Ask, "Did it work?” If not, ask, "What will I do now?” 7.Foster Leadership Skills and Good Will Provide opportunities for children to discuss their ideas and make decisions regarding classroom activities. Establish a children council or other organization that acknowledges children's interests and concerns and promotes character development. Increase kindness throughout the school by having students and staff write down observed caring behaviors. Acknowledge the identified children. 8.Help Children Discover Their Strengths and Talents Provide time for children to imagine themselves doing something outstanding and worthwhile. After they set goals for themselves, discuss ways to reach their goals, and brainstorm choices they may need to make. 9.Model Tenacity, Emotional Maturity, and Healthy Attitudes Be organized, consistent and use appropriate coping skills. Be genuine and avoid embarrassing or using sarcasm with a child. 10.Involve Parents To Foster a Bonding, Nurturing Parent-Child Relationship Help parents see that they are their child's most important teachers, and that as role models they need to spend quality time teaching, training and exhibiting those habits and values they want their child to have.

Thank You

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