FHS FINAL PROJECT LOVE IN THE MEDIA BY: TANYA ALLEN

BRIDGET JONES DIARY If you have not seen this movie, I highly recommend that you do. In the first courtship of this movie we find the all common, passionate love. Bridget has had a long standing crush on her boss and falls hard for him once he shows her the slightest bit of attention. He then leaves her by the wayside once he is done with her. Of course he comes pinning back for her in end of the movie but by then she has moved on. Is this not the plot line that most of us who have be burned by someone yearn for? I really love this movie and it makes me laugh every time I watch it. I think that more humor in any relationship can give it longevity and meaning. I do like how Bridget becomes ok with herself and that gives her what she needs to discover her attraction to Mark Darcy. She is silly and says the wrong things at the wrong times as most people tend to do at some point in time. However I still do not think that it gives a realistic view of love since all her mistakes look so enduring whereas in real life they just look like mistakes. I do however think that you can have hostile feelings for someone and then realize the deeper attraction to them. There truly is a thin line between love and hate.

LOVE ACTUALLY This movie is one of my personal favorites, it has all different kinds of love. While doing this project I found that the majority of love that you will find in movies is the passionate love. This usually develops into companionate love which lasts longer and is usually more fulfilling that just a short term stint of passionate love. In this particular movie I think most people are looking for the perfect combination of both. Emma Thompson and Alan Rickman play a married couple who seem to have figured out how to do this. However, the man strays for a small amount of passion and forever hurts the long standing relationship he has with his wife. In this particular scene, Colin Firth has discovers he cares a lot for his short term housekeeper and makes the decision to go and find her. I don’t necessarily think that this is a good example of realistic love. Awhile I am sure that several people feel the love that this couple portrays, the grand gesture in opinion is always one that does not work out like you have planned. I don’t think that love needs to witnessed by hundreds of onlookers to validate it but it sure does make for a fabulous movie.

PRIDE AND PREJUDICE Ah, Pride and Prejudice! You see several types of love in this movie as well. There is the long standing marriage between Elizabeth’s parents. A great example of companionate love. Mr. Wickham and Elizabeth are good example of passionate love. Once they found out more about each other the relationship would not have lasted. Of course the famous Darcy and Elizabeth connection has that every so desirable combinations of attraction and long term compatibility, or so we are lead to believe. Most of the problem with love in the media is you only see the beginning of most stories which are fun and filled with attraction and giddiness. Once again, I don’t think that this is the best example of real life romance or love. It is the adult version of Cinderella. Poor girl with little circumstance gets rescued by rich, handsome gentleman. I do like that there are compatibility issues and there is not just a memorable ride away in to the sunset. Elizabeth is also every woman’s hero. She speaks her mind and calls people out as she sees it. This makes Darcy just love her even more, when in real life this quality can be a bit exhausting to deal with.

FIDDLER ON THE ROOF At last we come to the classic. I grew up watching this movie, my parents just loved it. When I first read the definition of companionate love in the text, I immediately thought of this movie. The passion, if there every was any, has died out. Perhaps it is still found here and there. What is left if the everyday life of survival and family. I think that this is a better portrayal of realistic love. I have been married for 16 years and there were times of joy, times of sadness, times of love, and times of frustration. There are no rich princes or fairy godmothers, just the everyday commitment to each other and our family. It is the calm getaway from the craziness of life and I am very grateful for it. As she says in the song, she has spent the last 25 years enduring with him, and if that is not love than what is? I think this a better depiction of a real life marriage and relationship. The ups and downs and the years of struggle would hopefully just bring you closer together. In a real marriage there will be times when you are not head over hills and that is just fine. With the bad times I am told you learn more to appreciate the good ones.

THE NOTEBOOK At last we have come full circle. Even my husband can say that he likes the notebook. I think this is the perfect example of both types of love. They are so involved in one another in the very beginning it is the perfect example of passionate love to me. Then once they do decide to move on with their own lives, they are never quite able to forget the intense feelings they had for one another. This is pretty realistic to me for the start of most long term relationships. Almost everyone at one time or another can remember being head over hills for someone. I love at the end how he tells her how hard its going to be but wants them to be together anyway. We don’t usually see this side of the relationship in movies and you forget or do not realize how much work a relationship is going to take. While not everyone’s story can be as romantic as the Notebook, it does capture so many things that most people have felt at one time or another. I think is why it was such a successful book and movie. I really like how they show the progress of the relationship and how even after the passion is gone or hard to find again, there are other things that take its place.

CONCLUSION As much as I just love all of the movies that I chose for entertainment, I do think they may have a harmful effect on those who get a little too obsessed with the characters and the relationships. If there is anything I have learned in this class and life in general, its that you can compare anything of yours to someone else’s. It will only confuse you and make you feel like you are above or lacking what another person has. While I think love in the media is definitely here to stay, this project has made me wonder what the long term affects of it might be. They young girls obsessed with “Twilight”, the book series “50 Shades of Grey”, even the television show “Greys Anatomy” all give the wrong idea how things are in reality. As much as I love the escape of a good book, show or movie I have to wonder what my young daughters or son take away from it. If you are only basing your idea of relationship on some sort of medium, I fear you will always be left wanting. I am sure it depends on what your fascination may be also. If it is a handsome vampire coming in you window at night, then yes there is going to be an issue with reality. I have to say that this was such a fun project to work on. I learned to much about love, the human body, how the mind reacts to sex and so forth that it really does make the more sappy movies I love have a bit more depth. I really did learn so much more than I thought I would. I really did think that this would be a basic anatomy and functions class. It was much more in depth and I am so glad I chose to take it.