Leadership – Emotional Intelligence Brittney Williams, CGFM, CPA

Dictionary.com Skill in perceiving, understanding, and managing emotions and feelings

IQ vs. EI Its not IQ versus EI both have value IQ tells you what level of cognitive complexity a person can manage in their job; you need high levels for top management, the professions, the sciences, while lower levels work fine in lower echelons. EI sets apart which leaders, professionals, or scientists will be the best leaders. A recent study on CareerBuilder stated that 71% of employers value EI over IQ.

What is Emotional Intelligence It is very important to understand that emotional intelligence is not the opposite of intelligence, it is not the triumph of heart over head – it is the unique intersection of both. David Caruso Emotional intelligence is a way of recognizing, understanding, and choosing how we think, feel, and act. It shapes our interactions with others and our understanding of ourselves. If defines how and what we learn; it allows us to set priorities; it determines the majority of our daily actions. Research suggests it is responsible for as much as 80% of the “success” in our lives. From Handle with Care: Emotional Intelligence Activity Book

Why is EI so important? IQ isn’t enough to be successful in life EI affects several areas of your life: Your performance at work Your physical health Your mental health Your relationships

Four Branches of Emotional Intelligence Perceiving Emotions First step in understanding emotions is to accurately perceive them. i.e. understand nonverbal cues Reasoning with Emotions Using emotions to promote thinking and cognitive activity. Help prioritize what we pay attention and react to; we respond emotionally when things catch our attention Understanding Emotions How we perceive others emotions can have a wide variety of meaning. i.e. boss is acting angry – could be your work, could be he got a speeding ticket driving to work Managing Emotions The ability to manage emotions effectively is the key part of emotional intelligence. Regulating emotions, responding appropriately and responding to the emotions of others are all important aspects of emotional management.

Quote time “We are being judged by a new yardstick; not just how smart we are, or by our training and expertise, but also how well we handle ourselves and each other.” Daniel Goleman, Ph.D. Working with Emotional Intelligence

Characteristics of Emotional Intelligence – 5 Elements Self-Awareness People with high Emotional Intelligence are usually very self-aware. Understand their emotions and don’t let feelings rule them. They are confident – because they trust their intuition and don’t let their emotions get out of control. Willing to look at themselves honestly. Know their strengths and their weaknesses, work on these areas so they can perform better. Some believe this is the most important part of EI.

Characteristics of Emotional Intelligence – 5 Elements Self-regulation Ability to control emotions and impulses. People who self-regulate typically don’t allow themselves to become too angry or jealous, they don’t make impulsive, careless decisions. They think before they act. Characteristics include thoughtfulness, comfort with change, integrity, and the ability to say no.

Characteristics of Emotional Intelligence – 5 Elements Motivation People with a high degree of EI are usually motivated. They are willing to defer immediate results for long-term success. They’re highly productive, love a challenge, and are very effective in whatever they do.

Characteristics of Emotional Intelligence – 5 Elements Empathy This is perhaps the 2nd most important element of EI. Empathy is the ability to identify with and understand the wants, needs and viewpoints of those around you. People with empathy are good at recognizing the feelings of others, even when those feeling may not be obvious. As a result these people are usually excellent at managing relationships, listening and relating to others. They avoid stereotyping and judging too quickly and they live their lives in a very open and honest way.

Characteristics of Emotional Intelligence – 5 Elements Social Skills It’s usually easy to talk to and like people with good social skills, another sign of high EI. Those with strong social skills are typically team players. Rather than focus on their own success first, they help others develop and shine. The can manage disputes, are excellent communicators, and are masters at building and maintaining relationships.

EI Skills What I See (Recognition) What I Do (Regulation) Personal Competence (Self) Self-Awareness Identify “hot buttons” Keep a journal Slow down- present Get to know yourself under stress Rewind the video- what can you learn Self-Management Breathe right Count to 10- Pause Get enough sleep and exercise Focus on what you can control Anticipate and respond positively to change

EI Skills What I See (Recognition) What I Do (Regulation) Social Competence (Others) Social Awareness (Empathy) Ask good questions Listen with your whole body Watch body language Practice active listening Eliminate distractions Relationship Management Be vulnerable and open Ask for feedback and follow up Check your attitude daily When you care, show it ID how you want people to feel Ensure you words and actions are aligned Be accountable

5 components at work Definition Hallmarks Self-Awareness The ability to recognize and understand your moods, emotions, and drives, as well as their effect on others Self confidence Realistic self-assessment Self-deprecating sense of humor Self-Regulation The ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods The ability to think before acting Trustworthiness and integrity Comfort with ambiguity Openness to change Motivation A passion to work for reasons beyond money/status Propensity to pursue goals with energy and persistence Strong drive to achieve Optimism, even in the face of failure Organizational commitment

5 components at work Definition Hallmarks Empathy The ability to understand the emotional makeup of other people Skill in treating people according to their emotional reactions Expertise in building and retaining talent Cross-cultural sensitivity Service to clients and customers Social Skills Proficiency in managing relationships and building networks An ability to find common ground and build rapport Effectiveness in leading change Persuasiveness Expertise in building and leading teams

QUIZ TIME

How Emotionally Intelligent Are You? 14 signs you have a high EQ You’re curious about people you don’t know You’re a great leader You know your strengths and weaknesses You know how to pay attention When you’re upset, you know exactly why You can get along with most people You care deeply about being a good, moral person You take time to slow down and help others You’re good at reading people’s facial expressions After you fall, you get right back up You’re a good judge of character You trust your gut You’ve always been self-motivated You know when to say “no”

Signs You Need to Work on your EI You often feel like others don’t get the point and it makes you impatient and frustrated. You’re surprised when others are sensitive to your comments or jokes and you think they’re overreacting. You think being liked at work is overrated. You weigh in early with your assertions and defend them with rigor. You hold others to the same high expectations you hold for yourself. You find others are to blame for most of the issues on your team. You find it annoying when others expect you to know how they feel.

How to Improve Your EI Observe how you react to people Look at your work environment Do a self-evaluation Examine how you react to stressful situations Find ways to reduce stress Take responsibility for your actions

Beware of the gap between intent and impact How to Improve Your EI Get Feedback Beware of the gap between intent and impact Press the pause button Wear both shoes

5 Ways to Spot an EI Leader Non defensive and open Aware of their own emotions Adept at picking up on the emotional state of others Available for those reporting to them Able to check their ego and allow others to shine

7 Habits of Highly Emotionally Intelligent People They focus on the positive They surround themselves with positive people They are able to set boundaries and be assertive when necessary They are forward thinking and willing to let go of the past They look for ways to make life more fun, happy and interesting They choose how they expend their energy wisely Continually learning and growing towards independence

Quote Time Having fulfilling, effective relationships – that’s a sign of emotional intelligence Goleman The resilient person isn’t papering over the negative emotions, but instead letting them sit side by side with other feelings. So at the same time they are feeling “I’m sad about that”, they are also thinking “but I’m grateful about this”. Barbara Fredrickson

Questions Brittney Williams, CGFM, CPA Heinfeld, Meech & Co., P.C. 3033 N Central Ave., Suite 300 Phoenix, AZ 85012 brittneyw@heinfeldmeech.com 520-275-3135