NEW CONCEPT LANGUAGE Men are from Mars; women are from Venus.

Mars (Martians) Venus (Venusians)

You don’t really listen. What the hell are you thinking about?

They had more and more unpleasant talking like this: Venusian (woman) I’m thirsty. It’s nothing. I don’t feel well. Are you busy now? I am so tired today. I suffered a lot! Martian (man) Go drink some water. Well. It’s fine. You’ll be fine later. Yeah. Quite busy. Me too.

Finally…

There was another story about a wise Martian and an intelligent Venusian Because they recognized that they were different, they were able to solve these problems.

1. They know that their languages are different  So when there ’ s a conflict: Step 1: They pulled out their phrases dictionaries to understand each other more fully instead of starting judging or fighting. Step 2: They go to a translator for assistance if that didn ’ t work.

2. They know that Martian and Venusian languages had the same words but different meaning depending on the way they were used. Similar expressions with different connotation or emotional emphasis.  So when communication problem emerged: they assumes it was just one of those expected misunderstandings and that with a little assistance they would surely understand each other.

They experienced a trust and acceptance that we rarely experience today.

A Reflection What is that difference theoretically and methodologically?

Movie episode: He’s Just Not That into You

An obvious truth is that: Men and women THINK differently Men and women SPEAK differently Men and women DECIDE differently

Learn it from the beginning

Women’s language: Yes =No No = Yes Maybe = No We need = I want I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry We need to talk = I need to complain Sure...go ahead = I don’t want you to

I’m not upset. = Of course I’m upset, you idiot! Are you listening to me? = Too late! You have to learn to communicate. = Just agree with me.

What is going on when a man and a woman are talking to each other… 1.Women tend to exaggerate the facts a little bit for effect and use various superlatives, metaphors, and generalizations. Men mistakenly take these expressions literally and react in an unsupportive manner or respond with an argument.

We never go out. The house is always a mess. No one listens to me anymore. Nothing is working. We are always in a hurry. That’s not true. We went out last week. It’s not always a mess. But I’m listening to you right now. Are you saying it is my fault? We are not. Friday we were relaxed. Only a way of expressing the frustration, not factual information.

2 Women have been taught since childhood to use “ hint language ” when asking for something she wants or needs. Men are more direct in their languages.

Is there anything else you want to say? Do you think I am fat now?

3. Men speak in short phrases with little or no details, whereas women speak in paragraphs, giving lots of story-like details. Men want and need the “bottom line” first, while women want and need details, details, details.

W: How was your day. M: Fine. W:… (I don’t know what’s going on in his life.) Men communicate to report facts, while women communicate to build harmony.

Anything to add? Argument Criticism Exceptions