Verbal and non verbal strategies De-personalise the issue Why take the flak for something out of your control?If you have no influence over an issue then say so. Try not to sound like a ‘jobs worth’ but if its not your decision but policy then say so. Personalise the issue If the aggression is directed at your professional role a little disclosure about yourself may encourage openness in others. You do not need to give them your life history but show yourself as an individual. You should also try to establish a relationship with them based on ‘we’ ie ‘we can try to work this out together’

Asking for a particular behaviour You may need to ask for a specific behaviour to be carried out. You may also need to be assertive and raise your voice but DO NOT SHOUT at them. Be very clear about what you want them to do. ‘Sit down and we can better than ‘why don’t you stop pacing up and down because it’s getting on my nerves and I cannot talk to you properly because you are not paying me any attention.’ ‘let go of my arm’ is better than ‘oh yea just what do you think you are going to do now’

Fogging You can block an irrelevant challenge made to you such as ‘How can you help me,you have never been homeless,mentally ill etc’ You could say ‘I may never have been homeless,mentally ill etc but that should not stop me from working with you to solve the problem’ Distraction Re route the conversation to another subject and/or event

Ask for delayed compliance Rather than standing over someone demanding that they do what you want immediately you could ask for delayed compliance. They are more likely to comply if you allow them some dignity and space ie: ‘ I will be back in 5 mins and would like to see you …….

Non verbal tactics to diffuse Our non verbal behaviour can be a powerful indicator of how we really feel. It includes everything with the exception of the actual words we use. It includes the tone level and pitch of our voice,gestures,proximity etc. It is more powerful than the words we use and a major part of any interaction. People will believe non verbal language over verbal. Much of it is unconscious and must be employed subtly to have any positive effect.

Mood matching Try to match the arousal level of the other person. Try to put as much energy into your problem solving or however you are dealing with their problem as they are into being aggressive. DO NOT display your level of energy as aggression but rather interest,and concern. Slightly reduce your level of activity and try to being their level of aggression down. Eye contact Try to maintain normal eye contact. Avoid if at all possible the 3 rd stage where eye contact is of high intensity, of long duration and aversive.

Mirroring We can reflect they way the other person is standing or sitting. This can happen naturally when people get on well or are in agreement. If we can subtly mirror the other person it can be quite effective in defusing the situation. DO NOT be perceived as mimicking or it will have the opposite effect. Squaring up People square up when they are being confrontational. Try to maintain a small angle between you and them. Try bending the knee without moving feet.

Personal Space Try not to crowd the other person. Violent people have been found to require about 3 times the personal space as non-violent people and as such can be more easily crowded in and feel uneasy or threatened. Trans cultural non-verbal communication within mental health.