Conflict Styles Avoiding Issue and relationship both are insignificant Accommodating Relationship is more important than the issue Forcing The issue is more important than the relationship Compromising Cooperation is important (give a little, get a little) Collaborating Relationship and issue are both important (takes more time)

Analyzing Your Conflict Style How is this conflict style working for you? What are your needs, and are they being met? What outcome could using this conflict style lead to? Are you satisfied with the outcome of this conflict style? Are there situations in which you change your conflict style? Are conflict styles situational? What would it take for you to change your conflict style? How would using a new style affect the outcome?

Activity 1 With a partner, one student clenches his or her fist. As a team, they need to figure out a way to unclench this student’s fist. You have 30 seconds to figure it out.

Conflict Outcomes Win-Win Win-Lose Lose-Win Lose-Lose

Think of a conflict you recently had. With a partner discuss the conflicts. How did you approach the conflict? What conflict style did you use? Did both of you feel satisfied? If you could be in the conflict again, what style would you use?

Conflict styles are based on the issue, the situation, the significance of the relationship, and personal values. The style one chooses directly affects the conflict’s outcome.

Understanding other’s perspectives Helps us have better relationships Helps us to be more effective communicators Opens our potential to learning and understanding others.

Bias A preference that affects judgment Prejudice Acting on a bias; choice based on bias

What prejudices do you see in our building? What is it about you that might provoke a response in others that doesn’t reflect “the real you”?

Perceptions and biases are a natural way of understanding the world we live in, but we don’t need to act on them. Awareness of perception is the beginning of understanding that can lead to change. Make no assumptions; take time to get to know the person.

Hints for dealing with conflicts on a one-on-one basis Take time to cool off Emotions have to be worked through. A resolution in which one party is the winner and the other party is the loser is no resolution. Think about the person as a person Break down role stereotypes Know your aim Know what’s important to you – state it clearly Try to understand what the other person is saying Listen, paraphrase, give feedback

Find something you can agree on Be specific when you introduce a gripe Don’t just complain Confine yourself to one issue at a time Ask for and give feedback on major points Never assume Do not predict how a person will react or what they will accept or reject Forget the past and stay with the present You can have an impact on the future.

Remember that these steps are always available to you during a conflict. They often help de-escalate the situation. These steps also help you see the other person’s point of view or perspective. Their perspective might be different than your own.

Vocab. Paraphrasing In your own words, explain what the other person said Summarizing Paraphrasing plus stating feeling Clarifying Asking open-ended questions to understand better Listening for feelings Through observation and listening, identify the feelings