Healthy Relationships Health 9

Health Relationships Define relationships –A bond or connection you have with other people How do relationships have a… –Positive influence on a person’s health –Negative influence on a person’s health

Health Relationships Development of relationships –Parents –Siblings –Friends –Opposite sex

Health Relationships List characteristics of a healthy relationship –Mutual Respect –Consideration –Honesty –Dependability –Commitment

Healthy Relationships List characteristics of an unhealthy relationship –Jealous of you when you spend time or talk with others. –Makes fun of you in front of others. –Makes all the decisions and tries to control what you do. –History of bad relationships. –You feel isolated from family and friends. –You feel less confident. You worry about doing or saying the right thing. You change how you behave to avoid an argument.

The Cycle of Violence The cycle of violence consists of a tension-building stage, a violent episode, and a calm or “honeymoon” stage.

Tension-Building Discuss situations in which freshman develop tension –Picks fights –Acts jealous and possessive –Criticizes or threatens –Has unpredictable mood swings –Isolates victim from others

Violent Episode Discuss what may happen during a violent episode –Uses force –May use a weapon –Causes serious injury –May destroy possessions

Calm or “Honeymoon” Stage Freshman often do…… during the honeymoon stage? –Asks for forgiveness –Makes promises –Buys presents –Is affectionate –Denies the abuse happened

Effects of Abuse Discuss why each of these situations present these specific feelings/behaviors –Victims of domestic abuse experience feelings of shame, fear, humiliation, and guilt –They often feel powerless to change their circumstances –An inability to trust or establish healthy personal relationships. –Often don’t get help

Breaking the Cycle of Violence You are in an violent relationship, discuss ways to break the cycle of violence? –Tell a trusted adult. Ask this person to help you find a way to resolve the problem. –Contact an abuse hot line or crisis center that can assist you in finding counselors or other forms of help. –Report the abuse to the police. It may also be appropriate to contact child welfare or youth services.

Dating Group dating vs. steady dating What to do on a date –Sports or athletic event –Community activities –Charitable activities List and discuss advantages and disadvantages of group dating List and discuss advantages and disadvantages of steady dating

Abstinence Abstinence – a deliberate decision to avoid harmful behaviors, including sexual activity before marriage and the use of alcohol, tobacco, and other drugs

Benefits of Abstinence How would freshman benefit from being abstinent? –Eliminates both persons’ risks of contracting a sexually transmitted disease, including HIV/AIDS –It’s the only 100% effective method to avoid unplanned pregnancy –Becoming sexually active goes against their personal values and adds to their self-concept –Abstinence allows to build a deeper friendship

Remaining Abstinent Discuss possible problems that would make it tough for a person to remain abstinent –Requires commitment and control –Dealing with peer/partner pressure

Expressing Affection List and discuss ways freshman can express their affection in healthy, respectful ways –Communicating and listening to each other –Spend quality time together

Saying No! –If you love me, you will. If you care about me, you won’t pressure me –Everyone’s doing it I’m not –Don’t be such a baby I’m not being a baby. I’m being smart. –My feelings won’t change. I’ll still respect you Maybe I won’t respect myself

Questions to think about How can you decide for yourself about remaining abstinent? Have I communicated with my boyfriend/girlfriend about my expectations in this relationship? Do my boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s beliefs about premarital sexual activity differ from my own? Does my boyfriend/girlfriend pressure me to engage in behaviors that I’m uncomfortable with? How would I feel about myself if I engaged in sexual activity? Am I prepared to deal with an unplanned pregnancy? What would I do if I found out I had an STD? How would I handle being infected with HIV? -virus that causes AIDS How would being a teen parent affect my goals and dreams?

Class Activity Divide males and females Each group make a list of the top 5 qualities they look for in a friend Compare list Next, discuss how the qualities change when considering someone to date