FROM WARTS TO WINGS: HELPING “TOUGH” STUDENTS LIVE HEALTHIER AND HAPPIER LIVES John Sommers-Flanagan, Ph.D. Department of Counselor Education University of Montana Johnsommersflanagan.com

TODAY’S PLAN Thanks to Iestyn Bright and Chris Schimmel of WVSCA for this opportunity Big GOAL: Articulate 10 key principles and strategies of human change that you can immediately use with students and parents

TODAY’S PLAN II Organized like a book All powerpoint slides are at johnsommersflanagan.com Instructions: I talk about 10 key principles and strategies You listen, laugh at all the right times, learn, and leave feeling inspired and filled with insights

MY POLITICAL PLATFORM The road to economic vitality, the road to environmental sustainability, the road to excellence in health care and social support programs, and the road to good government always has and always will run through education.

WHO ELSE HAS/HAD THIS PLATFORM? Nobody in But, John Adams, in the 1770s: “Laws for the liberal education of youth, especially for the lower classes of people, are so extremely wise and useful that to a humane and generous mind, no expense for this purpose would be thought extravagant” (McCullough, 2001, p. 103)

INTRODUCTION Keynote rating: R or PG-13? Tough Students are not Tough Students Opening Story or Visualization

CHAPTER ONE THE CATATONIC WOMAN

THE 1 ST BIG PRINCIPLE We should WORK HARD to not judge students, parents, and teachers based on their appearance and behavior because there’s always more to it than we think

CHAPTER TWO MEETING JESUS AT THE PORTLAND VA

THE 2 ND BIG PRINCIPLE If you want genuine cooperation Be less threatening

CHAPTER THREE TY AND THE BIG TRAUMA BOY The Amazing Mary Cover Jones

COUNTERCONDITIONING MOJO Challenging students (TOUGH KIDS), parents, and teachers are aversively conditioned to school counselors! How do we get reluctant students, parents, and teachers comfortable “in the room” with us?

THE 3 RD BIG PRINCIPLE Use counterconditioning mojo to get people comfortable with you and working on change What will you use?

CHAPTER FOUR: POWERS OF MIND

THE 1 ST CHANGE STRATEGY Use the power of your mind to creatively and relentlessly focus on YOUR GOALS

CHAPTER FIVE THE SATANIC GOLDEN RULE

THE 2 ND CHANGE STRATEGY Create your own positive respect bubble... and watch out for the REVENGE IMPULSE

CHAPTER SIX A CAT ON MY HEAD

THE THREE-STEP EMOTIONAL CHANGE TRICK 1.Feel the feeling (accept and respect it) 2.Think a new thought or do something different 3.Share the good mood 4.Teach someone else the three steps

THE 3 RD CHANGE STRATEGY Emotional states and emotional reactions are complex Students need simple strategies for managing their emotional lives.

CHAPTER SEVEN CREATE NEW STORIES

THE 4 TH CHANGE STRATEGY We can collaborate WITH STUDENTS to build stories of health and resilience

CHAPTER EIGHT ANDREA’S STRONG ARM

THE 5 TH CHANGE STRATEGY What you use tends to grow and strengthen This is the main rule from neuroscience We can help students strengthen their weak spots

CHAPTER NINE STOP SHAKING THE BOTTLE

THE 1 ST ANGER MANAGEMENT STRATEGY Counting to 10 is worthless if you’re carbonating your cognitions We need more sophisticated educational strategies

CHAPTER TEN THE CHERRY STORY

THE 2 ND ANGER MANAGEMENT STRATEGY It’s not what happens to us... But what we think about what happens to us... That causes us misery

SUMMARY AND CONCLUSIONS Be careful in your judgments, because students are watching If you want genuine cooperation, be less threatening Like MCJ, use your counterconditioning mojo Use the power of mind to focus on your goals Create a school filled with respect bubbles Help student manage their moods Use collaborative storytelling Teach better strategies Stop carbonating those cognitions It’s not what happens to you... but what you think...