1. Zounds! Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevelopment.com/

2. Let me give you an “I” message. Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevel opment.com/

3. “I” messages are based on a theory of communication called transactional analysis. TA was first described in the 1960’s by Eric Berne in his book Transactional Analysis. Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevel opment.com/

4. Transactional Analysis Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevel opment.com/ Parent Adult Child Parent communications are best demonstrated when one person tells another something and gives directions or expresses opinions that should be assumed to be obvious facts or the information is presumed to be indisputable. “Don’t use drugs. They are bad for you.”

5. Transactional Analysis Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevel opment.com/ Parent Adult Child Child communications are best demonstrated when one person acts deferential in the communication. “Daddy, do you think I should use drugs?” Some child communications are silly. “I really luv you werry, werry much!”

6. Transactional Analysis Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevelopment.c om/ Parent Adult Child Adult communications are best demonstrated when one person gives another information and the expectation is that the information will be interpreted appropriately by the person receiving the communication. “Many studies have shown that drug use is dangerous.”

7. Transactional Analysis Communications that work. Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevel opment.com/ PACPAC PACPAC

8. Transactional Analysis Communications that work. Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevel opment.com/ PACPAC PACPAC

9. Transactional Analysis Communications that work. Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevel opment.com/ PACPAC PACPAC

10. Transactional Analysis Communications that don’t work. Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevel opment.com/ PACPAC PACPAC

11. Transactional Analysis Communications that work best. Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevel opment.com/ PACPAC PACPAC

12. “I” messages. Use the force………. Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevelopment.com/ When you________________ _________________Happens and I feel ________________. Behavior Here Feeling Here Behavior Consequence Here

13. I Messages the graduate course. Hiam Ginott XYZ When you did X It made me feel Y and I would rather you did Z. Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevel opment.com/

14. Dr. Hiam Ginott I've come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element in the classroom. My personal approach creates the climate. My daily mood makes the weather. As a teacher I possess a tremendous power to make a child's life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration. I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations it is my response that decides whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or dehumanized. Henry J. Nicols http://internationalcenterfortalentdevel opment.com/