1. jokes What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea.

2. What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no idea

3. What did the dumb ghost do? Climb over the wall.

4. Who gives cats presents on Christmas? Santa paws.

5. When your Mum was crazy what did she do? She tried to drown a fish!

6. What did your dad do when he was crazy? Try to kill a bird by throwing it off a cliff!

7. Why was no one at the sea? Because the sea weed!

8. How do you win a race easy besides cheating? Run faster then everyone else!

9. Where do ghosts hang out? At dead ends!

10. What biscuit can fly? A plain biscuit!

11. Why didn’t the football player play football on the plane? Incase he was put on the wing!

12. What begins with p ends in e and has a million letters in it? Post office!

13. What do you get if you cross and millipede with a parrot? A walkie talkie!

14. What to you get if you see a vampire in the snow? Frost bite!

15. What did the crazy man make? A solar powered torch!

16. What do you cal a penguin in the dessert? Lost!

17. What do you get if you cross a vampire with a teacher? Lots of blood tests!

18. Speaking jokes! A boy was on a bus and he sat down. A fat lady was across the walkway from him. Fat lady: “If you were a gentlemen you’d get up and let someone else sit down.” Boy: “And if you were nice you’d get up and let four people sit down!

19. Teacher: Tom what’s on trees besides leaves? Tom: I'd no. Teacher: bark Tom bark. Tom: Woof woof.

20. Teacher “Today we’re talking on mount Everest!” Kid “I cant I need to be home before 4 o’clock.”