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English II EOC Writing
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Make-up of test Revising & Editing Expository Essay Persuasive Essay
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Dictionaries Can use a dictionary on any part of test. Revision / editing – check misspelled words or make sure right word used (i.e. correct spelling with correct meaning). Multiple-choice questions – make sure you know the correct answer when it asks you about a definition. Essays – check words that you may have misspelled or look up good words to use.
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Expository Essay Expository – Clearly explain what you think about something. It is not an argument, it is a very clear explanation about what you think about a particular subject or idea. You are NOT trying to convince the reader. You are simply explaining your viewpoint. You may use 1 st or 3 rd person. It should reflect your thinking about your life and your world, so first person is ok, but try not to overuse it. In other words, use it sparingly.
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Expository Essay Prompts Contain a stimulus or background information and require students to do four tasks: Read – A 2-3 sentence story / summary to get the student thinking about an idea. Or it may be a quotation of some sort to get students thinking. Think – They give you a one sentence statement that they ask you to think about. This helps you to get closer to understanding your topic. It helps you to construct an idea of what you will be talking about. Write – What you will write about.
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Sample Essay Prompt (Read):Read the information below. In 1955 medical researcher Jonas Salk introduced an effective polio vaccine. At the time polio was considered the biggest threat to public health, yet Salk refused to profit by patenting the vaccine because he was more concerned with preventing the disease than with personal gain. (Think): Although many people work to benefit themselves, some people choose to put other first. Think carefully about this statement. (Write): Write an essay explaining whether people should be more concerned about others than about themselves.
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Attacking the Expository Prompt DO NOT WRITE ABOUT THE STIMULUS (THE READ) OR THE STATEMENT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO THINK ABOUT. Write only about the sentence where it says “Write an essay …” The top part should stimulate your thinking and help you to better understand what they are asking, but it should ABSOLUTLEY NOT appear anywhere in your essay AT ALL. So, let’s re-read this prompt and try to attack it together.
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Practice Pre-Write So, let’s re-read the prompt. Make sure to focus on the WRITE part especially. Now let’s underline and brainstorm. Write an essay explaining whether people should be more concerned about others than about themselves. So underline explain (means you need to defend your choice with a because statement), whether (you need to make a choice about the next part), and should be more concerned others than themselves. Now you need to brainstorm. So first make a choice – should people be more concerned about others than themselves. Why? Take your brainstorming and form a complete sentence. This is your THESIS. It is the basis that your whole essay is built around. Every other sentence in your essay should be supporting, explaining, defending, and clarifying this sentence. Do not stray from this task.
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Pre-Write Continued Now that you have your thesis, you need to pre-write for your body paragraphs. You need to come up with examples from the real-world, news, politics, non-fiction literature, or from your life that support your statement. Now remember that the prompt asks SHOULD people do this, so your examples can also be how people don’t and how that is bad. Really think about the best examples you can think of. Talk about what you know but also think about conversations you have had with parents, about your social studies class lessons, books you have read, any of these things that are relevant to the topic. You need to come up with 4 examples to discuss. Figure out how will you divide up the two paragraphs; or if it is better for you to put it into one solid body paragraph, you can. You need to figure out a topic sentence for these paragraphs.
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Introductions Short but effective. 2-3 sentences long. Come up with an attention getter that is on the topic and NOT IN THE FORM OF A QUESTION. State your thesis (answer to the question) very clearly. Get to the point. Really explain what you think.
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Body Paragraphs Concrete details are examples from the real-world, news, politics, non-fiction literature, or from your life. Use 4 concrete details. 4 concrete details. Only use really good examples. Really explain how it relates to thesis, and what it reveals about it. Why do you believe what you do? Be really clear in explaining what you believe and why. Develop your examples with explanation. How does that relate to your thesis? Don’t get off topic, but don’t say things without explaining them…remember point of this essay is to clearly explain what you think. Don’t make the reader try to guess what you meant… not doing a good job explaining then. Develop a game plan ( a pre-write) for the order of the examples. Think about why you are putting examples in that order or that paragraph.
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Conclusions You must have one. You must wrap up your point…don’t leave reader hanging on an undeveloped idea. Don’t repeat yourself. Graders hate repeated words because it is wasting space. Make it an effective and meaningful way to wrap up your essay. Tie it to bigger ideas. The bigger meaning behind what you think. Use more of a thematic statement that relates to the answer of the question covering the purpose of your point. 2-3 sentences. Really explain yourself here. Delve deeper into why you believe this…and the impact on society of believing what you do. What would happen if others believed the same way, etc.
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Format Introduction: Attention Getter / thesis (attack it the same way as an AP Prompt) Body(ies): CD, CD, CD, CD, CM as needed. One or two body paragraphs is up to you. Conclusion: DO NOT RESTATE THE THESIS. Wrap up your point and then comment on the relation of your point to how it affects society.
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Be Sure to… State a clear thesis. Organize your writing. Develop your writing. Choose words carefully. Proofread.
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Length One page – MAXIMUM! 26 lines (includes bottom “heavy border line”) No “double-lining” allowed 15 – 20 sentences Get to the point. Make each word count. Choose examples and words wisely. Must pre-write because every word counts. Develop your answer but no wasted words or space.
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Score Point 2 Essay Thinking about others before you is a nice thing to think of, but if you think of yourself first it makes you feel isolated. Caring about others before you isn’t a bad thing, but thinking about yourself isn’t bad either. To me I think of others before me. Some people have the good life, others don’t. I’ll rather put myself in danger than others being in danger as well. I’m only one person but risking myself could save more than one life. When your in a room where there seems to be a fire some people will think of themselves while others think of the rest. The doctor could risk himself getting polio but he could save hundreds of lifes that currently have polio. To me people that think of themselves before others are selfish and maybe greedy, but other that think of others are kind people.
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Critiques of Score 2 Essay Didn’t get to the point quickly enough. Didn’t take a side. No organization. One paragraph only…no division of ideas or organization. Lacked connections and transitions. Discussed stimulus story about polio. Vague language – bad, nice, etc. Didn’t explain ideas (i.e. how feel isolated) Lacks specific examples (closest one is fire example). All hypothetical and general, no real-world examples. “To me” – no need…you are writing, reader knows it is your opinion Spelling and grammar errors (lifes and comma errors).
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Higher Scoring Essay Eample Humanity has a funny way of contradicting itself sometimes. All children are taught to share and put others’ needs before our own. Somewhere down the line we realize that the very people who preach these things to us don’t follow their own rules. It is very important in society today to remember the bigger picture, which often includes doing things to help others with no benefit to yourself. People use each other for personal gain all the time. A glorified outlook on this way of life is all around us. In media, people are more concerned with which Hollywood star is going out with which millionaire rather than the thousands of people dying of hunger in third world countries. As consumers we see this life and wish to be like that. Doing something for monetary gain is just like money itself: easily expendable and transient. But doing something to help others leads to emotional and moral gain. The memories and feelings you get from helping others won’t ever go away. It’s worth something to you. Worth more than money could ever be.
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Class Pre-Write Write an essay explaining whether people are judged by the friends that they keep.
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Examples of Evidence There is no limit to the kinds of evidence you can use. Real life or real world examples are best. Everything from a quotation -- Most people believe that "birds of a feather flock together” …to a personal anecdote -- "When I became friends with Sharla, a sunny cheerleader, my popularity increased for a few days; when I befriended Aaron, a shaggy-haired introvert, my reputation plummeted” …to a modern or historical example -- "political candidates like Mitt Romney are often judged for the lobbyist friends they keep" or "During the Red Scare, it became dangerous for people like to be friends with a known Communist” …to a serious piece of statistics, even a fabricated one -- "In a recent survey, 55% of teens surveyed listed 'who their friends are' as one of the top factors influencing their opinions of their peers”.
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Partner Pre-Write READ the following quotation. A famous businessman once said, “Players win games; teams win championships.” THINK carefully about the following statement. Sometimes you can accomplish good things by yourself but better things with other people. WRITE an essay explaining whether it is better to work by yourself or with a group.
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Persuasive Essay Introduction: Attention Getter / thesis (attack it the same way as you do an AP prompt) Body(ies): CD, CD, CD, CD, CM as needed 1. You must make a concession (consider a point from the opposite side) 2. Refute the opposition Conclusion: DO NOT RESTATE THE THESIS. Wrap up your position and then comment on the relation of your position (side) to how it affects society.
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Let’s Practice Are teenagers given more than they need by their parents? Complete a pre-write More objective/serious prompt: Is the world producing enough food?
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Revising & Editing Remember that you can use a dictionary and thesaurus in this questions. If you don’t know what a word means in a reading or questions, LOOK IT UP! Make sure to go back to the reading and examine the sentence along with the sentences around it. This will help you to determine how the sentence is phrased or worded best.
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Revising & Editing continued Read the passage carefully before attempting to answer the questions. Read the essay one paragraph at a time. Make meaning notes by each paragraph. Remember the paragraph format when determining where to move or when to delete sentences. Pay attention to verb tenses! When working with sentences, be sure not to change the meaning of the sentence.
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