1. Dr. Beverly Smith-Keiling Dr. Bev Goals: learn and practice different areas in writing – _ M Introductions/Organization (start outline & intro thesis) _ T Formats (outline-paper, journal, thesis, PPT, poster, etc.) _ W Mechanics/grammar (practice, practice, practice) _ Th Editing/revising (practice improving sentences) _ M Structure (Abstract, Intro, Methods, Results, Conclusions) _ T Language (practice precise and concise sentences) _ W Illustrations (example visual graphs, photos, tables, etc.) _ Th Putting it all together (citing sources, avoiding plagiarism) »Grammar practice each day

2. Structure: the Strategy of Style Beginning Ending Middle If a man can group his ideas, then he is a writer. Robert Louis Stevenson

3. Beginning Ending Middle The organization of a scientific document can be viewed as a beginning, middle, and ending Title Summary Introduction Middle Sections Conclusions Back Matter

4. Beginnings prepare readers for understanding the work Summary tells readers what happens in document Introduction prepares readers for the middle Title orients readers to document

5. A strong title orients readers to your area of work Effects of Humidity on the Growth of Avalanches Effects of Humidity on the Growth of Electron Avalanches in Electrical Gas Discharges

6. A strong title also separates your work from everyone else's work Studies on the Electrodeposition of Lead on Copper Effects of Rhodamine-B on the Electrodeposition of Lead on Copper

7. Several names for summaries exist Summary Abstract Technical Abstract Executive Summary Descriptive Abstract Informative Abstract

8. Although several names exist for summaries, there are essentially two approaches This paper describes a new inertial navigation system for mapping oil and gas wells. In this paper, we will compare the mapping accuracy and speed for this new system against the accuracy and speed for conventional systems. Descriptive This paper describes a new inertial navigation system that will increase the mapping accuracy of oil wells by a factor of ten. The new system uses three-axis navigation that protects sensors from high-spin rates. The system also processes its information by Kalman filtering (a statistical sampling technique) in an on-site computer. Test results show the three-dimensional location accuracy is within 0.1 meters for every 100 meters of well depth, an accuracy ten times greater than conventional systems. Informative

9. A document's introduction prepares readers for the discussion Topic? Importance? Introduction Arrangement? Background?

10. The introduction defines the scope and limitations of the work Proposed Study on Effects of Alcohol on Life Expectancy Three classes of drinkers: non-drinkers moderate drinkers heavy drinkers Ten-year study Other effects, such as exercise, not considered Medical histories not considered Women may not experience the same effects Men surveyed scope limitations

11. A strong introduction tells readers why the research is important This paper presents a design for a platinum catalytic igniter in hydrogen-air mixtures. This igniter has application in nuclear reactors. One danger at a nuclear reactor is a loss-of-coolant accident. Such an accident can produce large quantities of hydrogen gas when hot water and steam react with zirconium fuel rods. In a serious accident, the evolution of hydrogen may be so rapid that it produces an explosive hydrogen-air mixture in the reactor containment building. This mixture could breach the containment walls and allow radiation to escape. Our method to eliminate this danger is to intentionally ignite the hydrogen-air mixture at concentrations below those for which any serious damage might result. importance

12. In the middle of a report, you present your work Choose a logical strategy Make sections and subsections Heading Subheading Heading Subheading Heading [Sandia, 1985]

13. Common strategies exist for the middles of scientific reports Chronological [Maizels, 2001] Spatial [Pratt & Whitney, 2000]

14. Common strategies exist for the middles of scientific reports Parallel Parts Corel Corporation Flow [Sandia, 1985]

15. Section headings should be descriptive and parallel Non-Parallel Non-Descriptive Introduction Background Marx Generators Line Pulse Beam Generation Transporting Beam Pellets Results Conclusions Introduction Background Marx Generators Line Pulse Beam Generation Transporting Beam Pellets Results Conclusions Parallel Descriptive Introduction Past Designs for Particle Beam Fusion New Design for Particle Beam Fusion Charging Marx Generators Forming Line Pulse Generating Particle Beam Transporting Particle Beam Irradiating Deuterium-Tritium Pellets Results of New Design Conclusions and Recommendations Introduction Past Designs for Particle Beam Fusion New Design for Particle Beam Fusion Charging Marx Generators Forming Line Pulse Generating Particle Beam Transporting Particle Beam Irradiating Deuterium-Tritium Pellets Results of New Design Conclusions and Recommendations

16. When you divide a section into subsections, all the pieces should be of the same pie New Design for Particle Beam Fusion Charging Marx Generators Generating Particle Beam Pellets New Design for Particle Beam Fusion Charging Marx Generators Generating Particle Beam Irradiating Deuterium-Tritium Pellets

17. Organization is hidden when headings occur in a long list without secondary headings Performance of the Solar One Receiver Introduction Steady State Efficiency Average Efficiency Start-Up Time Operation Time Operation During Cloud Transients Panel Mechanical Supports Tube Leaks Conclusion Performance of the Solar One Receiver Introduction Receiver’s Efficiency Steady State Efficiency Average Efficiency Receiver’s Operation Cycle Start-Up Time Operation Time Operation During Cloud Transients Receiver’s Mechanical Wear Panel Mechanical Supports Tube Leaks Conclusion

18. Many journal articles follow a set organization named IMRaD Materials and Methods Results Discussion Introduction

19. In a strong ending, you analyze results and give a future perspective Analyze results from overall perspective Conclusions Analysis of Results Several options: Make recommendations Discuss future work Repeat limitations Future Perspective

20. Use appendices to supply background for secondary audiences Appendix A Concern About the Greenhouse Effect For almost a hundred years, experts have been concerned with the increasing concentrations of gases such as carbon dioxide, methane, and nitrogen oxides in the earth's lower atmosphere. These gases are natural by-products of combustion. Figure A-1 illustrates the correlation between global temperature and carbon dioxide concentrations...

21. Use appendices to supply secondary or tangential information to primary readers Appendix B Project Stormfury In 1961, the United States Weather Bureau and the Department of Defense (Navy) began a project to reduce the strength of hurricanes. The project, called Project Stormfury, uses cloud seeding, a process used to produce rainfall and reduce hail in thunderstorms. In Project Stormfury, silver iodide crystals, similar in structure to ice, are dispersed by airplanes in the upper reaches of cloud formations just outside the hurricane's eye where the winds are highest. Initial results showed that wind speeds decreased between 15– 30% after seedings...

22. Glossary burst point: the exact point in space where an atomic bomb is detonated. clear visibility: a viewing range of twenty miles. fallout: the descent to the Earth's surface of radioactive particles from a cloud contaminated with the fission products of a nuclear explosion. hypocenter: the point on the earth's surface directly below the burst point; also called ground zero. For secondary readers, use a glossary to define unfamiliar terms

23. Failing to cite the contribution of others can be a fatal flaw in your career James Watson surreptitiously looked at Rosalind Franklin’s work [Franklin, 1952] Watson did not give enough credit to Franklin [Luzzati, 1950]

24. Language: the Way We Use Words Short words are the best, and short words when old are best of all. Winston Churchill Concise Familiar Clear Fluid Precise Forthright wordwordwordword word wordwordwordword word wordword word

25. Some practice sentences helped us organize a thesis. We start with an idea. EX: Taking public transport is good. Then, we start with some broad ideas, and narrow them down. Using public transport reduces congestion, lowers CO2, lowers our stress of driving, increases exercise and health, etc. We write the thesis statement to focus the scope. We use parallel sentence structure to outline the focus of the paper and organization of the body of the paper. This paper presents ideas about why taking public transportation is better than driving a car, and focuses on the benefits to the environment and the individual based on lower carbon dioxide (CO2) and better health. The impacts of reduced congestion, lower CO2, and improved health are analyzed and discussed.

26. Generalities that are not anchored with specifics are soon forgotten After recognizing some problems with the solar mirrors, we took subsequent corrective measures. Trash After finding that high winds (and not hail) had cracked the ten solar mirrors, we began stowing all mirrors in a horizontal position during thunderstorms.

27. Generalities that are not anchored with specifics are soon forgotten After recognizing some issues with traffic congestion, we believed CO2 was highest with commuting. Trash After finding that the number of cars with individuals were highest during the morning commute, we began analyzing the difference if people took busses instead.

28. For precise language, you should avoid over-specifying details The number of particular hydrocarbon combinations in our study is enormous. For example, the number of possible C 20 H 42 is 366,319 and the number for C 40 H 82 is 62,491,178,805,831. The number of hydrocarbon combinations in our study is enormous. For example, the number of possible C 40 H 82 is more than 62 trillion.

29. For precise language, you should avoid over-specifying details The number of vehicles during every morning commute is enormous. For example, the number of cars on Monday is 366,319 on highway 1 and the number for Tuesday on all highways is 62,491,178,805,831. The number of vehicles during every morning commute is enormous. For example, the number of cars on any given day varies around four hundred thousand per highway and is more than 62 trillion on all highways.

30. For precision, you must choose the appropriate level of detail Operations at the plant stopped momentarily because the thermal storage charging system desuperheater attemperator valve was replaced. Operations at the plant stopped for 1.5 hours so that a valve in the thermal storage system could be replaced.

31. For precision, you must choose the appropriate level of detail The number of vehicles during every morning commute is enormous. For example, the number of cars on Monday is 366,319 on highway 1 and the number for Tuesday on all highways is 62,491,178,805,831. The number of vehicles during every morning commute is enormous. For example, the number of cars on any given day varies per highway, per day, and is more than 62 trillion on all highways.

32. R.I.P. Complex wording buries ideas This study will consider why current solar energy systems, such as Solar One, have not reached the commercial stage and will find out what steps we can take to make these systems commercial. The goal of this study is to develop a commerciali- zation strategy for solar energy systems by analyzing factors impeding early commercial projects (i.e., SOLAR ONE) and by identifying the potential actions that can facilitate the viability of the projects.

33. R.I.P. Complex wording buries ideas This study will consider how taking public transport, such as the bus M5107, will decrease the number of cars on each respective highway, for example, highway 1 and 171, and will reduce the number of personal vehicles in our urban environment. The goal of this study is to determine what the decrease in cars on city highways would be if more people switched from driving individual cars to taking more public transportation (e.g., express commuter buses).

34. Stacking adjectives before nouns swallows the ideas Solar One is a solar-powered pilot plant located near Barstow, California. Solar One produces 10 megawatts of electricity by capturing solar energy in a central receiver design. Solar One is a 10 megawatt solar thermal electric central receiver Barstow power pilot plant.

35. Stacking adjectives before nouns swallows the ideas The M5107 is an express commuter bus that runs directly between Suwon and Seoul. It has fewer stops, uses the hi-Pass bus lane, and arrives faster than driving a car. M5107 is a direct access high speed express faster-than-a-car commuter bus between Suwon and Seoul.

36. Complex sentences misdirect readers The goal of the work was to confirm the nature of electrical breakdown of nitrogen in uniform fields at high pressures and electrode gaps which approach those obtained in engineering practice, prior to the deter- mination of the processes which set the criterion for breakdown in the above-mentioned gas in uniform and non-uniform fields of engineering significance. At high pressures (760 torr) and typical electrode gap distances (1 mm), the electrical breakdown of nitrogen was studied in uniform fields.

37. The more muddled the original, the more revisions are needed to streamline it At high pressures (760 torr) and typical electrode gap distances (1 mm), the electrical breakdown of nitrogen was studied in uniform fields. In our study, we examined the electrical breakdown of nitrogen in uniform fields. For these experiments, the electrode gap distances were typical (1 mm), while the pressures were relatively high (760 torr).

38. One measure for the complexity of the writing is the Gunning Fog Index In the index, the complexity of the writing depends on (1) the lengths of sentences (2) the lengths of words Desired index values for scientific writing are 10-12: New York Times (11) Scientific American (12) F i = 0.4 ( (N w / N s )+ P lw ) N w = number of words in a typical paragraph N s = number of sentences in the paragraph P lw = percentage of long words in the paragraph

39. An ambiguity is a group of words that can have more than one meaning We examined neat methanol and ethanol and methanol and ethanol with 10% water. We examined four fuels: neat methanol, neat ethanol, methanol with 10% water, and ethanol with 10% water.

40. Ambiguities occur for many reasons ????????? ??????? As light hydrocarbons evaporate the oil vapor pressure falls. Although engineers realized the design flaws in the Titanic soon after its sinking in 1912, the reasons for the severe damage inflicted by the iceberg remained a mystery until its discovery in 1985. ???? The proposed schedule is discussed below for the next four years.

41. about cause; bring about carry out individual can operate use Pretentious diction often causes problems with tone approximately facilitate implement individualized operationability utilization

42. Weak verbs hide the energy of your work A new process for eliminating nitrogen oxides from diesel exhaust engines is presented. Flow tube experiments to test this process are discussed. The percentage decrease in nitrogen oxide emissions is revealed. This paper presents a new process for eliminating nitrogen oxides from the exhaust of diesel engines. To test this process, we performed experiments in flow tubes. These experiments revealed a 99 percent decrease in nitrogen oxide emissions.

43. Passive sentences should be made more active. Is presented… by whom? This paper presents… Is discussed…by whom? To test this process, we tested… Is revealed…how? By what? Experimental results revealed…

44. A formal definition has a specific form Bremsstrahlung: the radiation emitted by a charged particle that is accelerated in the Coulomb force field of a nucleus. noun term + noun naming class to which noun term belongs information to separate noun term from other terms in class noun term

45. To tighten your writing, eliminate redundancies and writing zeroes Vibration measurements made in the course of the Titan flight test program were complicated by the presence of intense high-frequency excitation of the vehicle shell structure during the re-entry phase of the flight. Vibration measurements made in the Titan flight were complicated by intense high- frequency excitation of the vehicle shell during re-entry.

46. Examples anchor abstract generalities By the late Middle Ages, cities throughout Europe were building Gothic cathedrals. The only way, however, that architects could test a new design was to build the cathedral, a process that took more than forty years. Unfortunately, many cathedrals caved in during or after construction. What took forty years to test in the Middle Ages could have been done in minutes on a supercomputer. William Wilson

47. Mount St. Helens erupted on May 18, 1980. A cloud of hot rock and gas surged northward from its collapsing slope. The cloud devastated more than 500 square kilometers of forests and lakes. The effects of Mount St. Helens were well documented with geophysical instruments. The origin of the eruption is not well understood. Volcanic explosions are driven by a rapid expansion of steam. Some scientists believe the steam comes from groundwater heated by the magma. Other scientists believe the steam comes from water originally dissolved in the magma. We need to understand the source of steam in volcanic eruptions. We need to determine how much water the magma contains. When sentence openers do not vary, the sentences do not seem to connect Z Z Z

48. Varying sentence openers allows for more kinds of transitions between sentences Sentence #1 Sentence #2 Sentence #3 Topic of SentenceSubject Time of actionPrepositional Phrase Location of actionPrepositional Phrase Manner of action Adverb Subordinate actionDependent Clause Reason for actionInfinitive Phrase

49. Vary sentence openers to vary rhythm Mount St. Helens erupted on May… subject-verb In minutes, the mountain emitted… prepositional phrase Recently, debate has arisen... adverb Although the exact time of the eruption surprised scientists, evidence had been collected... dependent clause To understand the eruption, we have to... infinitive phrase

50. Varying sentence openers enlivens the writing and allows connections Mount St. Helens erupted on May 18, 1980. Its slope collapsing, the mountain emitted a cloud of hot rock and gas. In minutes, the cloud devastated more than 500 square kilometers of forests and lakes. Although the effects of the eruption were well documented, the origin is not well understood. Volcanic explosions are driven by a rapid expansion of steam. Recently, debate has arisen over the source for the steam. Is it groundwater heated by magma or water originally dissolved in the magma itself? To understand the source of steam in volcanic eruptions, we need to determine how much water the magma contains.

51. Avoid difficult or confusing words if the simple word is best. ability able (change sentence) additional more, extra additionally and accompanying with accommodation house acknowledge thank you adjacent to next to administer manage advantageous useful, helpful aggregate total, add up aid help alleviate relieve allocate give, divide alter change

52. Avoid difficult or confusing words if the simple word is best. alternative another, other, different amend change, fix ameliorate improve analogous like announce say, tell, report anticipate expect apparent clear, plain, obvious applicant you appropriate suitable approximately about attempt try aware know collection survey combined with used with compile put together complete fill out comprise have, include, contain

53. Avoid difficult or confusing words if the simple word is best. conclude end concur agree conduct carry out constitutes makes up contribute help, take part i correspondence writing, letter currently now, at present deem consider, think demonstrate show depart leave determine decide detrimental harmful disclose tell dispense give due to because of edit check

54. Avoid difficult or confusing words if the simple word is best. enable allow encounter come upon, (across), meet endeavour try enter (on a form) write enunciate say, state erroneous wrong eventuate result exclusively only exercise carry out exit way out finalise complete, finish, settle foregogo before forgo go or do without forward send immediately at once inaugurate start, begin inception beginning, start

55. Avoid difficult or confusing words if the simple word is best. indicate show, say, state individual person, or you (the respondent) inform tell inquire ask issue give lessee you (the occupant) livelihood living locality place maintain continue, support materialise happen, occur, come about moreover and, also notify tell, let know participate take part penultimate second last per annum for each year per capita for each person per caputa head

56. Avoid difficult or confusing words if the simple word is best. per diem for each day permit let persons people possess have Primarily mostly, firstly, mainly preceding last, before prescribed set, fixed preserve keep proximity near, close to record write down, keep refrain from do not render make, give repercussion effect, result represents is retain keep return, proforma form, questionnaire reside live

57. Avoid difficult or confusing words if the simple word is best. respondent, informant address directly as you request seek, ask require want, need rhetoric language, speeches said, same, such the, this, that (when you mean the) sibling sister, brother shall may, must, will solely only spectrum range submit send subsequently then, after, later suffice enough, will do supplement extra, another supplementary extra, another surrender give up thus so

58. Avoid difficult or confusing words if the simple word is best. transpire become known transportation transport ultimately at last, in the end utilise use wealthy rich would like want