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Writing the Conclusion Materials: Introduction paragraphs for “Should School Start Later?” Body paragraphs Planning Sheet copy as a reference Writing portfolios.

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Presentation on theme: "Writing the Conclusion Materials: Introduction paragraphs for “Should School Start Later?” Body paragraphs Planning Sheet copy as a reference Writing portfolios."— Presentation transcript:

1 Writing the Conclusion Materials: Introduction paragraphs for “Should School Start Later?” Body paragraphs Planning Sheet copy as a reference Writing portfolios Notebook paper

2 How to write a conclusion paragraph Writing a Killer Conclusion Schmoop

3 The preacher's maxim is one of the most effective formulas to follow for argument papers: Tell what you're going to tell them (introduction). Tell them (body). Tell them what you told them (conclusion).

4 Conclusions Conclusions wrap up what you have been discussing in your paper. After moving from general to specific information in the introduction and body paragraphs, your conclusion should begin pulling back into more general information that restates the main points of your argument. Conclusions may also call for action or overview future possible research.

5 Conclusio n: 1) Restate your Thesis. (Use 2 to 3 sentences to remind your readers of your main points) Finish With A STRONG FINAL SENTENCE! Try:  Making a Request or Call to Action  Making a Logical Prediction  Posing a Thought-Provoking Question  Reference to your Hook  Finding an Inspiring Quote  Make a strong emotional appeal

6 Reiterate your thesis Summarize your main points. This is YOUR CHANCE to take the liberty in your interpretation of your topic without having to show evidence as support. It’s like a lawyer’s closing statement/argument. Be BOLD in answering the question, “So What?”

7 How can I effectively present my argument? *Basic format Claim: The overall thesis the writer will argue for. Data (Evidence) gathered to support the claim. Warrant (Explain/Elaborate) (also referred to as a bridge [like the transitional sentence): Explanation of WHY or HOW the data supports the claim, the underlying assumption that CONNECTS your data to your claim. Backing (also referred to as the foundation): Additional logic or reasoning that may be necessary to support the warrant.

8 T. (transition) R. (reason) E. (evidence) E. (explain/elaborate) Many of you are citing evidence, but you are NOT explaining WHY or HOW that evidence proves your reasons.

9 Example: Claim: Hybrid cars are an effective strategy to fight pollution. Data1: Driving a private car is a typical citizen's most air polluting activity. Warrant 1: Because cars are the largest source of private, as opposed to industry produced, air pollution switching to hybrid cars should have an impact on fighting pollution. Data 2: Each vehicle produced is going to stay on the road for roughly 12 to 15 years. Warrant 2: Cars generally have a long lifespan, meaning that a decision to switch to a hybrid car will make a long-term impact on pollution levels. Data 3: Hybrid cars combine a gasoline engine with a battery-powered electric motor. Warrant 3: This combination of technologies means that less pollution is produced. According to ineedtoknow.org "the hybrid engine of the Prius, made by Toyota, produces 90 percent fewer harmful emissions than a comparable gasoline engine." Evidence Explain Evidence Explain Evidence Explain

10 Trampoline Thesis: So, do I think trampolines are too risky? Absolutely! They lead to entirely too many injuries and should be left only for the experts.

11 Although it is not exciting…a BASIC conclusion should restate the thesis with a summative transition word “in conclusion”. Example: In conclusion, trampolines are too risky and should not be used as toys because they lead to entirely too many injuries and should be left only for the experts.

12 One way to improve upon the conclusion is to use a different ending transition like: Conclusion / Summary / Restatement These transition words and phrases conclude, summarize and / or restate ideas, or indicate a final general statement. as can be seen in a word for the most part after all generally speaking in fact in summary * in conclusion (okay, but overused) in the final analysis in short in brief in essence all things considered to summarize on balance altogether as shown above overall ordinarily usually in the long run by and large to sum up on the whole given these points in any event in either case all in all as has been noted

13 Conclusio n Knowing what we know about trampolines, they are way too risky for kids to play on and use as a toy. There are far too many injuries, and serious ones at that. We should leave the use of trampolines to trained professionals who need trampolines to do their jobs, like acrobats, or people who need them to train and stay in shape. But, they are clearly not a TOY. If you were a parent, would you feel comfortable allowing your child to play at a friend’s house, knowing they have a trampoline, and one careless jump could leave them paralyzed for life or seriously hurt? Is that a risk you are willing to take? transition Try restating your reasons by paraphrasing them. Say them a little differently than “word for word” as in the first example. End with a BOLD statement. Try: Making a Request or Call to Action, Making a Logical Prediction, Posing a Thought- Provoking Question, Referring to your Hook, or Finding an Inspiring Quote.

14 Remember When transitioning between the body paragraphs, try to use a transitional sentence that touches upon the last thing you said and leads in to the new idea/reason. If you aren’t sure how to do that, then stick with transitions like: One reason… Another reason… A final or last reason…

15 Transitioning In the next two slides: Notice the last (safety nets) in my first body paragraph and how I take that idea and use it to transition in to the second reason I give in my thesis

16 One reason trampolines are too risky to be used as toys is because there are entirely too many injuries. According to the article “Are Trampolines Too Risky?”, there were “nearly 95,000 trampoline related injuries in 2012 alone.” That’s a lot of hurt children. The article also goes on to explain that many of these injuries are very serious. For instance, in the article the author told a story about a 14-year-old boy in Utah is now paralyzed after he broke his neck on a trampoline attempting to do a double backflip! A kid would never dream that they could have an accident so serious that they would never walk again from a toy that is supposed to be fun. Kids don’t realize the dangers trampolines really pose. In the section “Not a Toy” the article states, “One out of every 200 trampoline injuries leads to permanent brain damage.” And the article later explains that even when there are safety nets, kids are still getting hurt by the springs and colliding with each other. When this happens kids are ending up with more than just sprains and bruises. Some of them are breaking bones and even getting serious “injuries to the head and neck”. We should not be selling trampolines to kids as toys when this many serious injuries can and have occurred.

17 If safety nets can’t protect kids from getting hurt, then we should leave jumping and using trampolines to the experts. According to the article, “Are Trampolines Too Risky?”, young kids are most at risk. The article states, “37 percent of emergency-room patients injured on trampolines were younger than age 6.” The kid mentioned in the article who was in Utah and broke his neck and became permanently paralyzed after attempting a double backflip, was 14. So, even older kids, who you think would know more about jumping safely, still got hurt! Even Dr. Michele LaBotz, an author of the AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) said, “This is not a toy. It’s a piece of equipment.” The article explains that when trampolines were first invented in the 1930’s, they weren’t even meant to be used by anyone other than trained acrobats. And, later, when they were used again, they were only meant to be used by military pilots. Acrobats and military pilots are both experts in their fields. They have been trained. Kids haven’t. Kids can still jump, but they need to do it at a place like a gym or gymnastics facility where there are coaches to help them use trampolines correctly and safely.

18 Use your introduction and body paragraphs to craft your conclusion for “Should Schools Start Later?”.


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