1. What Child Abuse Professionals Must Know About Domestic Violence Jan Langbein Executive Director

2. WHICH CAME FIRST?

3. FACT Between 3.3 and 10 Million Children are Exposed to Domestic Violence Annually.

4. FACT The U. S. Advisory Board on Child Abuse suggests that domestic violence may be the single major precursor to child abuse and neglect fatalities in this country! (U. S. Department of Health and Human Services, A Nation’s Shame: Fatal Child Abuse and Neglect in the United States: Fifth Report, 1995)

5. Domestic Violence is the leading cause of injury to women. One in four women will be physically assaulted by a partner. One in three teens will be physically assaulted by a boyfriend. Every 12 seconds a woman is battered in this country.

6. FACT Women are more likely to be injured by domestic violence than by car wrecks, muggings, and rapes combined.

7. FACT Leaving a violent relationship is the most dangerous time. She has a 75% greater chance of being killed after she’s left the relationship.

8. What is Domestic Violence? Verbal Emotional Physical Sexual

9. WHY DOES IT HAPPEN?

10. WHY DOES SHE STAY?

11. WHY DOES HE DO THAT?

12. Battering/Abuser Personalities Jealous Controlling Behavior Unrealistic Expectations Isolation Blames others for Problems Hypersensitivity Verbal Abuse Treats of violence Rigid Gender Roles

13. Early Stage of Abuse The grooming process The true dynamic: control His attitude/paradigm His biggest fear: losing control

14. Later Stages of Abuse Abuse escalates as the relationship progresses How the cycle of violence is established and progresses Mutuality vs. Power Over Victim

15. Her Worldview Rigid Beliefs--all good, all bad Her fantasies about family and her role Value system

16. Her Worldview 50% Grew up in violent home Doesn’t recognize the abuse Abuse is the norm Rigid World View -Not safe -Not competent -Can’t control things (no one can) 50% All Good All Safe I can fix it without help It’s ALL my fault Rigid World View Competent In control

17. How She Presents to the World She makes up stories about injuries She believes she can solve all of their problems He capitalizes on her value system, further isolates her, and makes her responsible for the shame

18. Why is this Important? And, how does this impact children and adolescents who have grown up experiencing it…

21. What is your role in keeping the family safe? The impact of violence on kids is profound. It is not enough to tell mom to leave. It is not enough to say mom is not protective. We MUST work together to get mom safe so that she can protect her children.

22. THE CHILD….. Unintended Victim? Target?

23. Some Statistics Children are 1500% more likely to be abused in homes where domestic violence occurs 70% of men who batter their wives also batter their children The number one predictor of child abuse is woman abuse One in three teens will be physically abused in a dating relationship

25. Children who grow up in violent homes: Are 6 times more likely to commit suicide 24 times more likely to commit sexual assault crimes 74 times more likely to commit crimes against people 50 times more likely to abuse drugs or alcohol

28. SAME/DIFFERENT??? Child Abuse – there is someone to blame Domestic Violence – not so easy Is Mom Responsible???? Can they be Mutually Exclusive? Child Abuse + Domestic Violence ≠ Family Violence

29. SIMILIARITIES Crosses all Socio-economic, Ethnic, Culture Boundaries Increases in Frequency Increases in Severity Adults raised in a violent home have increased risk of perpetrating child abuse Adults raised in a violent home have increased risk of perpetrating partner abuse

30. SIMILIARITIES (CONT.) Not Isolated Events Underreported Shrouded in Secrecy Surrounded in Shame and Isolation Learned Behavior Transmitted Intergenerationally

31. DIFFERENCES CHILD ABUSE Perpetrators are Equally Divided Between Men and Women Reporting Requirements PARTNER ABUSE Majority of Perpetrators are Men Reporting Requirements

32. Factors That Affect the Impact Age Developmental State Severity, Proximity, Duration and Frequency of the Violence Child’s Role in the Family Presence (or Absence) of Loving/Supportive Adults

33. Maladaptive Coping Mechanisms Of Children Who Witness Domestic Violence

34. When a child is exposed to stress: Respond with increased hormones and activating different brain circuits to cope Essential response: help people protect themselves when threatened When it is over, the physical response decreases and disappears

35. Chronic exposure to stress = Never turn off stress response Live in constant state of alert, crisis

36. Three Categories of Stress Positive stress--moderate, short-lived response to normal situations Especially if occur against backdrop of safety, children learn to control and manage reactions to events with support Develop a sense of mastery (first day of school, meeting new people, experiencing frustration)

37. Tolerable Stress Responses that affect brain architecture, but are: Time-limited Allow for brain to recover and reverse harmful effects Supportive adult to help cope is critical to success (Divorce, frightening accident)

38. Toxic Stress Traumatic or complex stress Strong, frequent, prolonged activation of body’s stress management system Chronic, uncontrollable and/or experienced without access to support from caring adults

39. Toxic Stress Adverse impact on brain architecture Can mean development of smaller brain Intervention is necessary to prevent/reduce negative impact

40. Brain of 3 Year Old Victim of Abuse Brain of Normal 3 Year Old

41. Make no mistake… Living with abuse creates toxic stress A home where a child is terrified… And having ONE parent who is TERRIFIED and ONE parent who is TERRIFYING creates a long- term toxic stress response that needs expert intervention to help recover from.

42. All stress is best managed with: Understanding that permanent damage is not necessarily done Supportive adults are critical Effects of exposure to violence is mitigated with supports and interventions

43. This means…. It is up to YOU and YOUR department to create a top-rate response to TOXIC stress YOUR interventions must help FACILITATE safety in the home so that the child can recover. It is not enough to say that your intervention was to TELL mom to leave. That won’t work.

44. Factors promoting resiliency Number one factor in promotion of resiliency: relationship with mom We must foster this relationship in our work

45. Factors promoting resiliency Biological and psychological characteristics of child Quality of parent/caregiver relationship Stability and responsiveness of systems and staff Social supports and interventions for parents and other caregivers.

46. JAYCEE LEE DUGARD

47. Phillip and Nancy Garrido

48. Research shows: Intensive intervention programs work BEST Highly qualified staff that has access to program supports (supervision, consultation, training) Programs that are poor: minimal impact Outcomes increase with: intensive trauma-focused therapy

49. Intensive Therapy: Must focus on stopping negative chain reaction (child abuse, homelessness, depression) Critical to healing

50. It is not enough to just tell mom. We must help her make important changes that promote HER safety and safety of the CHILDREN

51. Values to infuse with family Boundaries Responsibility for actions Bullying won’t work Comfort first; correct later Increasing social support Identity development Problems can be solved

52. We must create a vision of safety and protectiveness for mom Empower her to make a difference Facilitate her taking the necessary steps

54. Jan Langbein jlangbein@genesisshelter.org 214.946-HELP